Ginny... and others familiar with the law
Moms View Message Board: General Discussion: Archive April 2007:
Ginny... and others familiar with the law
I have a question for a friend and was hoping you girls would know the answer.
I know that in most, if not all, states it is required that both parties be aware in phone tapping/recorded conversations. In my friends case she wants to record conversations with her ex in case she needs them for court with child custody issues. Does she have to tell him each and every time he calls that he is being recorded or can she just let him know from the get go that from this date every phone conversation that takes place between them is being recorded???
TIA
You have to check the individual state laws. In Pennsylvania, recording a conversation without the knowledge (and assumed consent because it is announced at the beginning of the conversation that it is being taped) of all parties is absolutely illegal and subject to potential stiff criminal penalties (this came up in a case I worked on). In New Jersey, I believe the consent of only one party is needed, but I don't know. So it is a matter of state laws. I suggest a google search with (state name) taping or recording telephone conversations or (state name) wire tapping. (In case you are wondering, when a police department or the feds have someone wear a wire, they always get a court order first.)
On the whole, however, she should talk to her lawyer first. It might be legal in her state but still something the court frowns upon. And, if he doesn't say anything "incriminating" in a phone conversation and she leads the conversation in such a way that he does say something that might reflect badly on him, is she commiting "entrapment"? If it were me, I'd recommend against it. In fact, my suggestion is that she tell him that discussions re custody be held only with her lawyer. If it is visitation, then the conversations are very simple - if he has specific visitation periods and rights, then he calls to say what time he will be there and when he will return the children, and nothing else should be discussed unless a child is ill and medication instructions need to be relayed, or a child has an "appointment" (play group, scout meeting, etc.) that has to be relayed.
I really recommend against trying to play games around this issue. It is one that can come back and bite the player in the proverbial sensitive place.
Here's a list to see if you are in a one party consent state or all party consent state.
http://www.pimall.com/nais/n.recordlaw.html
Thanks Ginny, i'll relay the message to her. I don't really know the details of their ordeal. I actually prefer to stay out of it.
Good thinking, Melissa. I try to stay out of such kinds of siutations myself, or simply murmur "oh dear", and "I'm sorry".
The ins and outs of child custody and visitation are a dreadful thing in general unless both parents adamantly put the welfare of the children first. Even if a spouse cheats on the other spouse, the cheating spouse is still the children's parent, and they should not be deprived of a parent or visitation unless the visitation is definitely harmful to the children. Unhappily, all to many parents put their children in the middle or use them as weapons - fathers demand full custody as a tool for financial negotiations, and so do mothers. it is really sad.
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