...had their tubes tied OUTSIDE of a c-section birth? Meaning, they were done having kids so 2 yrs after their last child they went into the hospital to have them tied?

We have some friends where the wife just did this because the husband REFUSED to get a "v". DH and I were like you've got to be kidding me! I don't know anyone (until now) whose done this. She's had 3 kids and he can't get a needle in the balls? Sorry, that's just the way I feel.

Tying them immediately after a c-section, okay that's your business they're in there anyway. Do you know women who have done this, or have you? I wouldn't do it that way in a million years. DH said I should ask the "mommy board".

By Mrsheidi on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 10:20 pm:

"She's had 3 kids and he can't get a needle in the balls?" ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, tell him that he has to use a condom for the rest of his life...maybe that might change his mind.

I've never heard of a guy not agreeing to a vascectomy. Is he afraid he won't be able to "spread his seed" anymore? Or, is he just plain afraid?

By Juli4 on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 10:59 pm:

The day after my 4th child was born I had my tubes tied. No big deal to me. Small incision and the recovery time is quick except that I just gave birth. The only thing I noticed was my muscles were more sore than usual. It is also not just a needle in the balls. IT is an incision and they cut the mans tubes also. So it is their personal choice. I would have pushed for a V though.

By Dawnk777 on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 11:04 pm:

My sister had her tubes tied, just a few years ago. Her only daughter will be 13 this year. DH and I still have all our parts.

By Kaye on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 11:16 pm:

I was always under the assumption that if you had your tubes tied after delivery it was something they just did. Well that is only true if you have a csection. If you have a vaginal birth, it is a 2nd operation, not a huge deal, but really no different than doing it a year or two later.

As far as a vasectomy. To each their own. I have to say though, although I was for the big v, I don't think I could have tied my tubes. yes I am finished birthing kids, but if he died and I remarried I might just have one more (maybe not so much now..lol). It is a big decision and we do all feel very differently about it. It is natural to give birth, not so much to stop the process, there can be side effects.

By Tink on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 11:33 pm:

I did have my tubes tied during my final c-section but one of the other reasons I was the one "fixed" was because my dh didn't want to lose his fertility...for lack of a better term. I knew that I was done having kids but he wanted to keep his options open if something were to happen to me or the kids we already have. It wasn't a big deal to me since I was having a c-section but I don't think I would have been so agreeable if I wasn't already going into surgery.

By Trina~moderator on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 08:47 am:

I know of several women who have had their tubes tied after having kids simply because their DH refused to get a V. My Mother is one of them. To each their own, but I find it sad. Apparently some men think it threatens their manhood. When we were sure our family was complete DH volunteered to get a V. He figured it was only fair, especially after I had 2 c-sections. I couldn't agree with him more! LOL! We didn't tell my parents because 1)it was our personal decision and no one else's business, and 2) we didn't want to hear my Dad's disagreeing comments. Even when the topic came up during casual conversation 2 yrs. after the fact my Dad shook his head as in disbelief that DH actually went through with it. Oh well, not his life or decision. Neither of us have any regrets whatsoever.

By Dandjmom on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 09:09 am:

All my aunts tubes are tied, my youngest want age 42 she had hers done two years ago after having her last and 3rd child by c-section.

Yes whom ever mentioned it they will only do it during child birth if you are having a c-section at the time. But she didn't have any complaints aboout extra healing time.

I wanted mines done after my daughter But could not find a doctor to agree to do them since I was only 21 and had just the one child. Well 8 years later I had my last child my son, and still since I had vaginal birth I couldn't get it done then. And yes I'm scared of any type of surgery so I backed out of an appoitment that I had Jan 06. But after of year of spending all that money on pills I finally went through with it this January And I must say I've heard stories form other women that your period gets heavier and you cramps , I haven't expercienced any of that.

And I don't know what other doctor's do but I was told my my doctor that they dont' tie and clip them no more, because they have found that they do grow back sometimes, do mines where burned I was back to work in 48 hours no problems. I have a small incision under my navel which is almost gone.

By Yjja123 on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 10:00 am:

My hubby had a vasectomy. He is always telling guys that it is no big deal. It is done in the office and is not major surgery (like having your tubes tied). He said it was the least he could do after seeing me go through childbirth twice.
We have several family members who think it is terrible. Granted-- they do not believe in any form of birth control. We knew two kids is all that we wanted.

By Karen~admin on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 10:28 am:

Regarding vasectomies, I think when men absolutely refuse, it is due to either of 2 reasons - they have a great fear of it, or they don't want to *lose their manhood* (as I have heard MANY men say, so whether that means losing their fertility or a fear of not being able to perform, which we all know is not the case, it's anyone's guess).

And, as in anything else, some men experience more or less discomfort than others. When my X had it done, he made me take the kids and stay at my mom's for the weekend because he *wanted to be alone with his bag of frozen peas*. Of course, I later discovered that his girlfriend (translated: MY X-friend, who was a skank for having sex with my husband when I and HER own husband did not know. LOL) was giving him lots of TLC that weekend, including keeping Big D and the boys iced down............. ROFL

But in answer to the ORIGINAL question, yes, I've know a few women who had their tubes tied at times other than when giving birth, but most of the women I know personally who've had that done, did it when they were having their last baby.

By Angellew on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 10:44 am:

ROFL Karen!!!!! Went off on a little rant there, no??? Too funny!

By Karen~admin on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 11:34 am:

Yea....~~~~blushing a bit here~~~~~ unfortunately, I tend to do that.....as you all know.......... sorry.........

By Breann on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 12:00 pm:

A good friend of mine had hers done on an outpatient basis. Her little boy was 2 years old. She said it wasn't a big deal. It's a tiny little incision. She was out of work for just a few days.

By Bobbie~moderatr on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 12:32 pm:

I think it is a personal choice... But yes tubes do grow back and it isn't only the womans tubes that do.... I know this from personal experience and I have 10 years olds to prove it.. LOL I know, not what anyone ever wants to hear. LOL

We have the Big V, a tubal and a hysterectomy between us.. LOL And I think it is a personal choice.. Dh did it because of two births on my side and he felt it was what he wanted to do.... He survived and it never effected him sexually in any way... However one of his tubes did scar back together and I ended up pregnant.. They aren't all together sure how but one of his tubes is reconnected.. I had the girls by C so I had them take care of my end of the baby making machine but good and they took out extra tube when they "tied" mine. I am clipped, sniped and burned ... Last year I had a hysterectomy and no more baby concerns for me...

It has to be an agreement and a personal choice between the couple...

By Paulas on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 02:16 pm:

I had my tubes tied 6 weeks ago. My children are 7 and 10. It's not that DH wouldn't get the big "v". I was going in for bladder surgery and the doc asked me if I wanted to get my tubes tied while he was down there. Partly b/c the birth of my children is what caused my bladder issues and if I wanted more children it might be best to postpone the bladder surgery until I was done having children/

By Wandilu on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 03:14 pm:

*****Karen**** too bad you didn't know what was going on with X and X friend at the time of his "surgery"...would have been fun to dress up like a surgical nurse and "help" them make the incision !! Like, oops, i didn't MEAN to cut it off !!!!!

By Tripletmom on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 04:11 pm:

ROFLMAO!!!!!!,Wanda

By Bellajoe on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 04:35 pm:

"including keeping Big D and the boys iced down"

Karen, that sentence cracked me up.

No i have not known anyone to have their tubes tied...at all. At least not to my knowledge.
My dh actually volunteered to get the V done. He was all set to go to it but I was 28 at the time and he was 30. Hello! That's a bit young to have your husband fixed. What if we changed our minds and wanted more kids or Heaven for bid something happened to one of our kids, i think i'd want to have another one.

In every couple I know that is "fixed" it's the man who's fixed, not the woman.

By Tarable on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 05:10 pm:

My husband and I have been discussing this very topic for about 6 months now. He has a huge phobia of doctors and anything medical so I would not dream of putting him through that (causes huge anxiety attacks). I would be the one that got "fixed" but we can't decide if we truly trust the procedure to be as effective as birth control. I don't want anymore kids, the 2 I have are plenty to handle.

I guess that the only thing that is stopping me if being a little lazy and not calling the dr office to find out how much of the procedure my insurance will cover. Well that and not being sure of the percentage that reverses on its own.

By Latonya on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 07:07 pm:

I had my tubes tied after my 4th child. It was done when he was 6 months old. He is 3 1/2 now. It was a fairly easy procedure. They went in thru my belly button so there is no scar. There wasn't much pain afterwards. Just mostly feeling bloated and a little pain in the incision area. My periods did get heavier and more cramping for a long time afterwards. They are just starting to get back to normal. But I knew I was done having kids and I was ready to have it done. OH I never had a c-section. All my kids were born vaginally.
My ex had a V and I do believe mine was easier. I was back up and at it the next day.