Nikki's post on the parenting board made me wonder how other people's DH's feel about MV.

I think when I first discovered it, he was curious how you can feel connected to people online, simply because he hasn't had that. I can relate because I was NEVER online when I worked unless it was work-related. I never would have imagined myself having online friends that I actually think about regularly! LOL He doesn't mind it one bit, but just didn't get it at first. He realized though that it's a nice outlet as a SAHM and a way to be social when you stay home. He calls it the "Mommy Board"! He often brings it up if we're debating an issue together or if we have a question about Natalie. He'll say, "Check with the moms on the mommy board and see what they say." He's realized also that you guys are like a mother's encyclopedia.

By Mrsheidi on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 10:03 pm:

LOL Scott loves it...he also calls it the "Mommy Board". He asks me how "the mommies" are doing all the time! And, Deanna, I had never felt so disoriented about a job, such as being a mother, and this place really is my anchor.

By Reds9298 on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 10:09 pm:

OMG Heidi! I'm so glad to hear you say that! I still sometimes feel like a fish out of water in this SAHM gig. Regardless of how much I love it, it's still going against my personal grain and was such a big adjustment for me.

Do you know what Natalie asked me yesterday out of the blue? "Mommy, do girls work?" (In my mind my mouth drops.) I answered that yes, of course girls work and that mommy works, remember? (developmental therapy = teacher to her) All I could think afterward was Wow..5 years ago I never thought I would hear that from MY child because I thought I would still be working full time. It doesn't change that I want to be home, but I just thought omg, maybe we should be emphasizing jobs more and what women AND men do. I don't know, it just made me think.

Sorry, that got way off topic but your statement really hit home with me!

By Mrsheidi on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 10:17 pm:

Yeah, teaching came SOOOO naturally to me. I felt like I was one of the best, at the top of my game, and knew everything! Being a mom, I was like, "What the...???" why won't this cute little thing let me sleep for longer than 4 BLEEPING hours?? ha ha ha...I laugh now but, at the time, I was a zombie whose memory cells seemed to evaporate into some parallel universe. I could have sucked on the pacifier myself and not remembered it 2 hours later.

And, I bet when Natalie talks about Daddy, you guys talk about him "going to work". That is a keen observation for such a young girl though. You have one smart cookie!

By Dawnk777 on Thursday, April 5, 2007 - 11:08 pm:

Ask me about his TDI board!! He talks about those people as much as I talk about all of you!!

It's a board for VW diesel cars. He's even gone to a get-together for the TDI Club people and is going to another one at the end of the month!
http://www.tdiclub.com/

By Enchens on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 12:12 am:

Mine says I spend too much time here, but he doesn't hesitate to ask me to ask you all for help when we have questions about stuff, like gophers, or blankets, or carpet cleaners...I could go on.

By Bobbie~moderatr on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 01:56 am:

I think most of the original group had issues with their spouses at first... I remember it being constantly brought up by the members.. This was 10 years ago for me, his major issue was me being on when he was home.. He didn't like to share me with a stupid computer.. He got over it with time.. Once he started hearing stories and seeing what it was truly about it became easier for him to understand.. He now knows most of the old timers by name, where they live and some of their stories.. There have been many instances over the years where he has had me come in and check on someone or something that was going on when I left...

MIL wondered what I was doing on line so much when she moved in 3 years ago, she had never seen a computer work, let alone had any use for one... DH told her that you all are like my real time pen pals... Instead of waiting for weeks for letters to arrive, they are there in the touch of a button and that instead of talking to one woman (as in a pen pal) I talk to so many in one day at one time it makes his head spin to think of all the chatter.. She has heard some of the discussions DH and I have had about things on the board and she finally gets it..

DH bought me a lap top, so I wouldn't have to share with the kids and so I could be online from a more comfortable seat.. Nice guy huh?? I don't think he cares to share in it but I think he gets what it has meant to me and he is fine with it..

Oh and it was/is also common that we were/are a little secret to the rest of the people in the real world outside of our homes... Honestly, it just came to me that this just might be one of the only spaces that is all mine in my life... LOL

By Trina~moderator on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 08:55 am:

Ten years for me too, Bobbie! DH knows and understands how important my online friend are. A valuable source of information and friendship! Before kids I taught for ten years and loved it. I had always planned on becoming a SAHM when we started a family, but the isolation came as a shock. I don't know what I would have done without my online friends!

By Karen~admin on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 10:19 am:

Ditto Bobbie and Trina. I met this group at Mom to Mom, when I was recuperating from my 2nd back surgery. Pam (Bubbels) and I have been friends since high school and she had been talking about it for months and months, trying to get me to join. Once I did, I was addicted. DH used to tease me about it, but it wasn't long before he was asking about *the moms*. Every day when I'm online, he asks *so what's new with the moms today?* LOL

More than once he's sent me links about product recalls, child safety (yes, he knows *who* you are, Trina! LOL), other things he thinks might be a good debate topic, or when he wants to know what people think about particular things (GPS, DV recorders, vacuum cleaners), he'll tell me to *post to the moms, see what the consensus is.*

He knows I am off-the-board friends with some moms I have met here, and honestly, *why* WOULD he have a problem with that? WE met online.

By Kaye on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 10:28 am:

Mine had his own sports forum. He actually exchanged emails with mark cuban (mavericks owner) for several years right when he was considering buying/bought the team. So he gets it. I have been a member since I was pg with my 11 year old at mommytimes. When that board shut down several of us formed a yahoogroup (different name back then..lol) and we still sort of stay in touch.

By Angellew on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 10:49 am:

When DH and I are discussing things regarding our DD, 95% if the time, he will say "What do the ladies on the Mommy Board say about all this?" LOL... I think HE looks to the advice I get here just as much as I do!

By Melanie on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 10:58 am:

Dh jokingly refers to it as the hen house. He says he knows when I am on the board because I am pecking away at the keyboard. LOL. But seriously, he gets why I like it here. He has his own forum that he frequents.

It's been nine years for me. I found Mommytimes and connected with Trina, who I had met a few years before IRL. She reconnected me with Eve who I was friends with in college. I was instantly hooked on the site!!

By Trina~moderator on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 11:09 am:

Kaye, MommyTimes was my very first mommy board. Talk about a rude and harsh awakening to the Net. LOL! For those of you who don't know, MommyTimes was not moderated at all. It was a very unfriendly place with lots of swearing, bashing, flaming, etc.. Several of us left and MomToMom was born.

Yes, Melanie is originally from the area where I grew up. We had met in the past IRL and then bumped into each other at MommyTimes.

By Karen~admin on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 11:32 am:

I've heard enough horror stories about MommyTimes to make me happy I didn't discover it. LOL I'm really glad I came on board at Mom to Mom when I did, and that so many members from there flocked to this site, AND that we have attracted even MORE great members.

By Bobbie~moderatr on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 12:10 pm:

Mom to Mom was my first and only site.. I found the site on mothers day.. I was looking for a site for mom's because I had seen a program on Oprah about SAHM connecting and saving their sanity through the internet.. The connections people had made, they were interviewing women that had connected through a site..

I remember very well when we got word that the site was going to be closing down and changing it's focus... I know just hearing we weren't going to be able to meet at Mom to Mom sent a lot of the members into a panic, LOL... What am I supposed to do now?? How are we going to stay in touch?? However, thanks to Pam (Bubbels) and her investing time into looking for a similar site that was up and running and not using their message boards, we were able to keep going with out missing a beat.. A bunch of us were on line the night that Mom To Mom closed.. Making our last post and saying goodbye to a site that had been our homes for many years...

Once it closed we had a mass joining here, thanks to Feona and John.. I think we blew their minds... We showed up and jumped their membership in one night.. Many of us came over here... Some chose not to but in time many have found us again... And thankfully all the rest have you have found us too...

The stories I (and many of the members) could tell about the things we have been through together to get to this point in our web lives with the group... We have seen each other through so much... And we have had some down right nasty fights.. But we always seem to get it together and keep pushing forward and growing stronger.. It is nice knowing this is here and I'm glad we have been able to keep it together for so long.. Heck many of us have gotten old together... LOL Can't say that about most groups.. LOL

By Boxzgrl on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 12:48 pm:

DH doesn't care. Well, i'm not here so much anymore but I do have another board I go to quite frequently. I'm actually planning a summer vacation here in San Diego for about 8 members so we can meet for the first time. He thinks it's pretty cool. When I first started message boards 4 years ago... he wasn't too thrilled about it.

By Nicki on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 02:12 pm:

I find myself wondering how SAHMs managed before the days of the internet. I guess that's one of the reasons moms on the same block would go to the next door neighbors and talk over coffee. I for one, am so grateful for MV!
My dh says he could never get involved with online groups. He said he believes people are not themselves, or rather make up an imaginary personality and join groups such as these. I figure, sure, once in a great while, but my thoughts are that these individuals don't hang around long. I mean, who would want to keep that up for years, LOL? I tell him I feel, if anything, we can be more ourselves and genuine when we communicate online. He doesn't get it, though, LOL. Yet, he listens when I have some helpful advice I receive here at MV.

By Dawnk777 on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 02:28 pm:

Well, I managed! LOL! I had a network of co-workers, who I could ask for advice, though. 1987 was the year of the weddings and 1989 was the year of the babies! We had 7 nurses pregnant, and due from January to September, in 1989!

We didn't get the internet, until 10 years ago, when Sarah would have been 7 and Emily about 5! So, I had to survive!

Oh yeah. When they were 3 and 1, we moved to Sheboygan, where my best friend from college lived, so if I needed anything, I could just call her!

By Kaye on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 02:39 pm:

I was at mommytimes in the very beginning before it got really ugly. I mostly skipped mom to mom though, not sure why. I made such good friends at mommytimes that it was worth putting up with the non moderation, well until the end, it had some bad moments!

The first time it really struck me odd about message boards was running into a former member..LOL. Long story, but the short version is I used to read and not really post, this member was moving, had posted several photos of her kids, etc. My dad also had just moved, the more this member talked the more I realized it was probably the same small town. I went to visit him and saw her in a store there. Honestly I was too stunned to say anything. But all I could think is, I knew so much about her, she had no clue who I was, IF i had been a bad person I would of be dangerous. Anyway, so I shyed away from posting for awhile. And now even though I post a lot, I don't post my children's names often and I don't give out too many specifics. There are times I forget we can have stalkers though!

By Bellajoe on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 04:58 pm:

When I first joined he was skeptical. You know how people pretend to be someone they are not online. He was worried that some of the people were not really women but men lurking. (you never know) When Amy had the house fire, which was when i was pretty new here, he thought it was a ploy to get people to send stuff to them. Which i can understand. But of course I know it was absolutely true and it devastating.
Now I have been here for about 4 years and he believes you are all women and moms LOL. I don't talk much about this place just because to me it's my own little sanctuary. It's where I get some of my "me" time.
Last year I was asking all your opinions on kitchen stuff when we were designing our kitchen. He really started liking ya'll when most of you agreed that hard wood floor was the way to go...because that's what he wanted and what he got LOL.

By Karen~admin on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 08:08 pm:

Nicki, I have said this before - I WISH I'd had a computer and a mommy board in the 80's!!!

By Paulas on Friday, April 6, 2007 - 09:13 pm:

I've been here from the beginning too. First Mommytimes, then Mom to Mom and now here. I don't post as often as some but it's been almost 11 years for me. Oh my goodness, how could it have been that long ago??

By Melanie on Saturday, April 7, 2007 - 01:00 am:

It's amazing how fast it goes, isn't it Paula? When I found Mommytimes I had a 2 year old and a five month old. Now my kids are 11, 9 and 6!! When I arrived at Mommytimes, Trina was pregnant with B. I remember her playing the name game and setting the date for her c-section. It's unbelievable to think about!!

By Ginny~moderator on Saturday, April 7, 2007 - 01:02 am:

A bit over 9 years for me. My mom died in October of 1997 after we had been living together for 5 years and I found myself living alone again, and I was lonely. I got a modem and got on the internet for the first time in December of 97 or January of 98> I started looking for those "chat rooms" I had been hearing about and after looking around a bit, typed "parenting" into a search engine because I figured that was something I knew about and it should be a safe topic - and found MomtoMom. I lurked for a few visits and then there was this post I felt I *had* to respond to. I felt a bit "funny", because it was clear that most of the women were young moms of young children, so in my first post I asked if it was alright for me - then in my late 50s - to join in, and I was made thoroughly welcome. I joined the trek over from MomtoMom, and would be lost without Momsview. I don't think I've missed a day - certainly not more than a weekend - since my first post.

By Annie2 on Saturday, April 7, 2007 - 09:42 am:

I first posted ten years ago when I had a 2 1/2 year old and a newborn. Now my kids are 15, 13, 11 and 9! We were stationed in Okinawa when the other board blew up.
Being so far from home, the board was a life link to the states for me and also as a parent of small children. Now I check everyday unless I'm away.
Even though I have never met anyone from here in person; I consider many of you dear friends. And lately I feel like I have met new friends. Justanaunt, Deanna, Angela and Heidi come to mind