Sampling Fruit in a Grocery Store??
Moms View Message Board: General Discussion: Archive January 2007:
Sampling Fruit in a Grocery Store??
The freecycle question got me to thinking about this one. Mods...feel free to move it to the debating board if you wish.
There is a man on talk radio here every morning that throws out a question for discussion, and asks people to call in with their thoughts. Sometimes, they are local issues, sometimes national or global. Todays's subject was this...
He was in a brand new, local grocery store that just opened. He saw an older couple in the produce department. They were shopping, but they
were helping themselves to grapes, and chowing them while picking out other fruits and veggies. The man said that he almost said something to them because he found it appalling, but he didn't know what the store policy was reagrding this.
I, too, have seen this happen, as has my DS Mike, who works in a grocery store produce department. He and I both believe that it is wrong. The store frowns on it, but seldom does anything about it for fear of offending the customer. His manager, however, has said that he wished there were a way to weigh the customers upon entering the store, and upon leaving it.
I deem it stealing. The gentleman on the radio said that he has seen people help themselves to loose candy (that you buy by the pound), and actually open packages of cookies or candy and take one, and put it back. So have I. That product now can't be sold, and is a loss to the store. If an EMPLOYEE gets caught even eating a piece of candy from a package that has been opened, they are fired. (That keeps them from OPENING a package, and saying they found it that way).
To me, until you have paid for something, it isn't yours, so it is stealing. I won't even let my boys (or myself) open a soda or candy, etc., until after we pay for it.
What are your thoughts?
I used to be a member of an unmoderated message board and we had a conversation like this one. Man, did it get crazy!
The gals there compared opening a bottle of pop in a store to dining in a restaurant and paying for the meal after you have eaten it.
Some people honestly think it's no big deal to open a soda or a bag of candy, especially if you are going to pay for it anyway. I can see in some extreme circumstance, like if your toddler spits up and you have nothing to wipe it up with, so you grab a roll of paper towels off the shelf and rip it open to clean up the mess, as long as you then purchase it. But really, some people are of the attitude that it's no big deal to grab an apple, since grocery stores (at least I was told where I used to work) do not have any way of taking inventory of produce or they just mark off open bags of candy as damaged goods.
And the stores probably don't take up their time and resources picking on people who pick up fruit when there are bigger apples to pick (pun intended! ) like people stealing baby formula or DVD players or shoes.
And only in a perfect world would everyone have such sterling moral vaues like you and me and refrain from consuming anything before it has been paid for.
Before we go to the store sometimes we go to the gas station and I may buy a bottle of pop for my son, and then I won't even allow him to take the pop with him inside the store for fear that they will think we got it there and didn't pay for it.
It has also always been an exercise in patience for him to wait to open a toy until AFTER the checkout process is complete. I always say, "No, it's not yours yet."
In fact, I have taught him that anything in the store must be treated with respect because it belongs to the store. We have seen kids ride skateboards and scooters and bounce balls in the aisles of the store. A manager had to talk to a couple of teens one night because they were so out of control.
Lisa - that's EXACTLY what I'm talking about...respect. I have even taught my children to pick up items that have hit the floor, and put them back where they belong. It really bothers me to see an item on the floor, and people step on it, or push their shopping cart over it. I guess we have so MUCH in this country that we take it all for granted. I once spoke to a lady who came here from Vietnam. She said that she was blown away by our grocery stores. She said that when she walked in and saw all of the abundance, she thought she was in Heaven! What really surprised her were whole aisles devoted to pet food, and for bags to throw away our GARBAGE! She said that all of the smells and colours of the food and produce just made her head spin.
Maybe we should all try to view what we have through the eyes of someone like her. Maybe we wouldn't take such things for granted.
You are right about teaching children patience and delayed gratification. And, you wouldn't allow your children to walk into someone's home and take out a package of cookies and help themselves. The same respect must be shown to stores.
Lisa, you and I are on the same page on this one. I actually go shopping with my 3 year old ds to the grocery store and I make it a point to let him know that we can't eat anything until after we buy it when he asks for something. If he asks for a yogurt or a piece of fruit, I tell him we haven't paid for it yet, so we can't eat it yet. We have to wait until we've paid. And I know he sees what I see, other people, adults mind you, helping themselves to the fruit. He hasn't asked me yet what I know is going to be the tough question. Why can they do it and we can't?
"Why can they do it and we can't?"
Because their parents didn't teach them any better!
Sampling fruit is wrong, because you can't pay for it, if you ate it! It's stealing!
On the other hand, a few times, I have grabbed a box of kleenex off the shelf, opened it up, used a kleenex or two and paid for it, at the end of the trip. I was desparate for a kleenex and it couldn't have waited.
Another time, we grabbed a toothbrush, opened it up, put it in the holes of the new toothbrush holder we were also purchasing, to see if it fit, and then paid for it, too. Our previous toothbrush holder had tiny holes and toothbrushes are so much fatter now! We needed to see if it would fit. We figured someone would need a new toothbrush eventually, anyway.
Dawn, I can justify that. You were buying those items. I, too, have had to grab a roll of paper towels to clean up a spill or mess that one of my toddlers made. However, to consume food that is sold by weight, or to open a pacakge of something, help yourself, and put it back in an unsaleable condition is just plain wrong!
Our local pizza place has a cooler with Cokes, etc. in it. When you order your pizza to eat there, you just go get a soda and consume it with your pizza, sub, or whatever. The man trusts people so much, that you pay AFTER you eat. I always have the boys (and myself) bring our empty soda bottles to the register to be rung up with our bill. However, I wonder how many don't, or inadvertenly throw away the empty bottle BEFORE paying. We live in a small town, and the merchnats trust the residents, because for the most part, the local people are honest. However, I'm sure he's been "burned", too.
Boy, do I get dyslexic late at night!! LOL!
Dawn, I've done similar things. The kids were hungry (bad timing on my part) and I'd open a box of granola bars and pat for it when we got to cash.
Lately though if something similar is required I'll pay for it before the rest of my groceries, esp. when it's something like bananas that need to be weighed. I never though about whether other people in the store might think I had stolen the bananas. 
As long as you pay for it when you get to the register - assuming it is something not sold by weight - that's OK. I agree, people who "sample" fruit or help themselves to loose candy are stealing - and the people who open a package, take some out, and leave the opened package are definitely stealing because that package can't be sold.
I was adamant with my sons, that if you don't pay for it you can't have it. I remember taking my oldest son, at about age 7, back to our neighberhood drug store to pay for a candy bar he had taken from the shelf. I can tell you that he was impressed by that (as was the store owner, who very nicely played along with me in impressing my son with the importance of not taking something you don't pay for).
Sadly, some people don't raise their kids the way we (me and all the posters above) do, and it's a shame. Having a good sense of what's mine and what's yours helps keep kids out of trouble. The general rule in my house was "if it's not yours, leave it alone - unless it's on fire, in which case you call Mom". (That last bit came from a question from my youngest, trying to find an exception.)
Ick - imagine all the germs on the produce at the supermarket from all of those people picking up fruit/veggies and smelling and squeezing for freshness. I can't imagine eating produce right from the store without washing it. I agree it's stealing, I don't care if someone grabs a box of something and opens it and uses whatever is in the box, as long as they pay for it at the end.
Ditto Colette on the germ thing!!!!!!
I agree that it's not yours until you pay for it, and for produce, how can you pay for it if it's sold by weight and you've already eaten it? Are you supposed to remember how many grapes you've eaten and then count out that many and have the cashier weight them and add that to your total? Yeah, like that would happen. My MIL will taste a grape or two to see if they're bitter. She asked me once when she was visiting and shopping with me why I don't do that. I told her first of all, they hadn't been washed yet (ew!) and second I hadn't paid for them. She thought I was nuts. We do have a couple local grocery stores (national chains) that in the produce department they will cut up peaches or such so you can sample them before you buy. The first time someone did that for me I was so impressed. They manager saw me smelling the peaches and said, "Here, let me cut one for you to try." I guess he figured if I liked them and would buy some it was worth the loss of one peach.
Growing up we NEVER opened anything in the store until we'd paid for it. Not even a box of crackers or cookies if we were really hungry. It just wasn't done. I do remember my mom opening a box of tissue once because I had a bloody nose, but we already had them in our cart to buy. I imagine if we hadn't she probably would have decided whether we needed tissue, paper towels or toilet paper and then we would have opened whichever we needed because we were going to buy it because we'd opened it!
"I guess he figured if I liked them and would buy some it was worth the loss of one peach." Actually, they loose so much to spoilage that employee offered sampling is worth the loss. You are more likely to buy something you know will be good and you are more likely to return to the store if you leave feeling they went beyond their duty to help you. Which is why they often offer samples of new items on the market.
However, sampling of products, that are not offered by an employee, is stealing.
I have opened tissues and paper towels in a time of need. I even opened a package of pads one time but I made the cashier aware, as I ran by her, of what I was doing. But they were things I bought when I cashed out, whether I needed them at home or not.
I can't stand it when I walk through a store and see things that need to be kept cold just shoved on a shelf.. I also have an issue with people opening packages of socks and underwear.. They tell you right on the package what the cut of the underwear is and they have a size chart on the back. Same thing with the socks.. Why the need to open them??
We went to Walmart on Wednesday. I decided to go through the U-scan because they were pretty busy and they NEVER have enough cashiers. I put my cash into the money thing and the part that kicks out your dollar bill change came to life. I was to get back six dollars. It kicked out five ten dollar bills and then it shut off came back on and kicked out my six dollars. I took the fifty dollars to the cashier that watches over the U-scan. She was shocked that I gave it to her. She then called over the head cashier who came right over to fix the U-scan. She too was shocked that I had given the money back. I on the other hand, did it with out a second thought. I just couldn't take it and leave, even though I know most would have. I would rather be broke and know I am broke then have money that isn't mine. I surly could have used the money but I know I will be provided for and I don't have to steal to get what I need.
Bobbie, I would have given that money back, too! No way could I have kept that!
I once was way undercharged for a pillow I bought. I went back and made it right! The cashier was really appreciative.
Ditto Lisa. It irks me when people open food in the store and eat as they shop. I was taught, and teach my kids, that it isn't yours until you pay for it.
Hmmm I have eaten a grape before buying them, because it is about taste for me. I wouldn't dare eat another fruit though.
As far as packaging opening...I open stuff. Why, well sometimes the size chart just doesn't work well, or I have had a bad experience, to see how thick the seams are, are the labels printed or sewn on. I never rip into it, I always try to open it carefully. I will say I have been burned so many times at walmart, by stuff not matching the packages, or just flat out being misrepresented that I open almost everything there. But not stuff that couldn't be resold. Like I wouldn't open a movie, or a game. If I choose not to buy the item and it needs taped up, then I will take it to a clerk to do so.
I don't let my kids eat and shop(i don't either), but because it is unclean mostly and a hassle for me. I am sure there have been times I have. I don't think I would pay first, I think I would open and pay when I checked out, but again not with weighted things.
I don't sample the fruit, just because it hasn't been washed...definitely a germ issue for me. I have seen people taste a few grapes, but nothing bigger then that.
Now, I have opened packages, but it is always something I am buying. A few times when my dks were toddlers, I have opened a package of cookies or something if they were having a major meltdown. But, like I said, I have always paid for them. I have also opened tissue before.
You know, now that I think about it, I did open a package of long underwear at Target last month. My ds is so tall and skinny, I have a hard time going by the size chart. However, I did open it at the flap, I didn't tear the package. And, after I looked at it, I folded it up, and put it back just like it was.
If my kids come with me to the store, they can eat something that I am buying if they are hungry. It's usally a granola bar, fruit snacks etc. I don't have an issue with this. I am responsible, and they are too. We would never steal, and I have taught them this from a very young age. Oh and I have sampled grapes when their not in season to make sure I'm not paying $6 for something that I will end up tossing when I get home! The stores I shop at almost always have the produce guy out there willing to let you sample any fruit they have in the store,so usually the fruit thing isn't an issue.
One time and one time only when dd was little and inconsolable in the grocery, she wanted a banana. I gave her a banana to eat and got a bunch. When I got to the register, I had the girl ring them up, then I pulled 1 off and told her to weigh that and charge me for one more and explained what I did. I apologized and told her it might be a couple cents off one way or the other but it would be close. She was looking at me like I was nuts and there was a manager standing there and heard me. He walked over laughing, told the cashier not to worry about it and appreciated my honesty. He is like someone mentioned above that it happens all the time and he wished there was some way to stop people from doing that. But he said he'd never had somebody offer to pay for fruit that had already been consumed and appreciated it.
But for the most part, I'm like the others. It doesn't get opened or eaten until it is paid for and officially ours. DD understands this oh too well so there's not usually a problem.
Barring any extreme circumstances, I think it is wrong to open any merchandise to consume it, whether or not it is sold by weight, before it has been paid for. I feel this way not only because it belongs to the store and isn't ours to consume until it is paid for, and because we need to model restraint, but mainly because if we allow ourselves or our children to get into the habit of consuming food or drink in the store before it has actually been paid for, then we run the risk of inadvertently forgetting to pay.
In addition, if a child thinks that he/she may be able to get away with opening or consuming something before it is paid for, they are given an avenue with which to experiment and go the next step and may intentionally try to get away without paying for it at all.
We can always prepare ourselves to go to the store with little ones. We can pack our our own snacks in plastic baggies in case they get hungry, juice in a sippie cup if they get thristy, and some wipes in a wipies case if there is a spill. There may always be some unexpected catastrophe that we aren't prepared for, but we can try our best so that we don't need to use the products off the shelves if we can avoid it.
And oh yeah, at our Home Depot on the little Coca Cola cooler in the front of the store, there is a sign posted on the door that says, "Please wait to consume beverage until it is paid for."
Okay ... who read my post on the parenting board (in the popcorn post) about Helen eating a tomato in the store I will taste a grape to see if they are ripe and sweet. That's the only way I can tell. I've seen some beautiful looking grapes, bought them and then thrown them away because they were sour.
That's the only time I do that and I taste just one.
Helen's learning slowly that all food within her reach is not for her, but she's only two and she loves tomatoes.
Ame
Lol, Ame, I thought of that when I read your post about Helen! I would have loved to see her eat that tomatoe!:-)
I have opened a package of granola bars from my cart in desperation for dd then paid on my way out. I don't like to do it, but bad timing on my part sometimes, too. Lara understands nothing is to leave the store unless we go through the check out and pay. Hopefully she is learning respect. Lol, she has been one to pick up things in the isle and put it back in it's place. She really has a time in the toy section, putting toys back in their right spot.
The first Christmas that Shawn and Mike were with us, I ordered a Playstation 2 on walmart.com, as a surprise Christmas gift for them. Well, a glitch happened, I guess, because they shipped me TWO, a few days apart. I took the second one back to my local Walmart store and told them what happened. I told them that I didn't have a refund or credit coming back because I had only paid for ONE, which I kept. All I wanted to do was return it. The girl at the customer service desk looked SO confused. She called the manager over who said he didn't know what to do. He wasn't sure he could absorb it back into his stock without granting a refund. He kept looking at me like I just landed from Mars. They kept thanking me. After they found a way to take it back, the manager handed me a $25.00 gift card for my honesty, which I thought was nice.
After Christmas, I told the boys what happened, as an object lesson in honesty.
Ginny, I too had to take my DD back to JC Penney when she was three years old. My Mom had given her an old purse to play with. She took it to Penney's with me. Apparently, while I was buying cards, she slipped some into the purse. No envelopes, and they were , like 'sympathy'cards, and the like. LOL! I found them when I was cleaning her room and questioned her about them. She knew she was "busted", and started to cry. We took money out of HER piggy bank, and we went back to the store. I asked a clerk to watch DD while I spoke to the manager. I asked her to really lay it on her, and tell her that they COULD have her taken to jail. She took Deb aside, talked to her, and then gave her a chance to pay for the cards and apologize. I NEVER again had a problem with any of my kids stealing. The manager thanked me and said that if more parents did that at three, they wouldn't be calling the police at 13.
Deb says that she remembers that to this day, and can't take as much as a pen from work. LOL!
I will admit that I have opened a box of Nilla Wafers for little dd, but, she only eats a few and I do pay for the whole thing at checkout. I have always paid for something I opened. I asked the cashier about this one time and he said that the store doesn't mind as long as you pay for it. However, I have worked at a grocery store where people have actually gotten a pickle out of the big tub and have eaten it while they walk around shopping and then discard the wrapper. I think that is totally tacky. Also, I hated it when the store closed at nine and people came in at 8:55 to do a huge grocery order. Now maybe they thought we were open until 10, but the loud speaker always came on to let them know that we were closing. Maybe that sounds petty of me. If they only came in for toilet paper or just a few items, I really wouldn't care.
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