Video Monitors
Moms View Message Board: General Discussion: Archive September 2006:
Video Monitors
Okay I have come to the decision I am looking into a video baby monitor (I am sure that my dd will love having a baby monitor in her room since she is 9). Does anyone have any experience with any of these. If so which one do you suggest or have you had problems with any?
This after she was up until 3:30 this morning and I didn't know it until she told me. She was a grouch this morning (yelling at everyone and not wanting to do anything but go back to bed) and I asked her when she finally went to sleep last night. She told me 9 for a long time, but I kept insisting that she only acts this way when she has stayed up too late and she told me "Okay you are right I think I went to bed finally around 3:30." This is very strange because my DH and I were both up until at least 2 and never heard a single sound coming from upstairs.
Oh well I would really like to know your experiences with video monitors if any of you have any.
You know really I wouldn't bother, at 9 she is smart enough to move it or to fake it if she needs to. Why isn't she sleeping? Personally if it were me and it was a behavior thing, meaning she can control it. Then I would ban her to the downstairs. Set up a pallet for her, have her sleep on the couch etc. Until she can choose to go to bed like a big girl, she stays downstairs.
My youngest at age 8 is doing this some. We pretty simply stated that it was his job to go to bed at bedtime. So we put him to bed and 30 mintues later I go check. He is usually asleep. If he isn't and he is up playing he is grounded for the next day. This has been very effective for him.
The problem with this is that we don't have a very large house and the only rooms downstairs are my room, the living/dining room and the kitchen. I don't want to go to bed at 9 like her and neither does anyone else in the house. If i put her to bed at 9 and go up to check on her she acts like she is asleep and I can't tell 95% of the time if she really is asleep or not and I can't sneak up on her because the stairs creek really loudly.
The days that she does this and I can tell usually and she is grounded but we never hear her up playing. I just know the next day by her attitude.
She says she does this because she can't sleep. I don't know what would be different so that she can't sleep. I just think she is not giving herself enough time to fall asleep. I am trying to make her bedtime earlier but I don't think this is going to help much since she says she does it because she can't sleep.
I noticed on the other board that you mentioned your DD has been prescribed ADHD meds. My next door neighbor's DD is ADHD, too. She literally never sleeps and the meds make it worse. Yes, she is a crank most of the time. The doctor said her body and brain are tired but her brain won't quit working to allow her to sleep. So, she now has to take another pill to sleep. The parents aren't happy about it but there is no way they can take her off of the ADHD meds as she is just now starting to do well in school. Just thought I would mention that as a possible reason she might be up at the wee hours.
We went through the same thing with our DD.She just wanted to keep reading,her books are that great to her.We grounded her from her reading for 3 nights after a few warnings.Magically she learned to put the book down and get to bed early.The book was very easy to hide under the covers so we didn't see it.I hope you get somewhere soon.I wouldn't go the video route I'd just try to figure it out or tell her bedtime is now at 7pm to catch up on the sleep that she's not getting at night.Good luck its frustrating knowing whats best for them but they think they know it all.
Ditto Tayjar-We were posting at the same time.I didn't realize you're DD is on meds for ADHD.I'd put a call into the doctor and get some suggestions.That's probably the reason, her mind is racing constantly.Maybe try some soothing things for her before bed. A bath,warm milk,classical music/relaxation music.It might wind her down a bit to ralax enough to fall asleep on her own.((HUGS))
Tara, I didn't notice that your dd was on ADHD medication. Dora's absolutely right that that could be part of the problem. What is you dd on? Mention her lack of sleep to her doctor and see what he suggests. Robin was on medication to get to sleep at night for years and still takes it occasionally (if he's stressed or has something really important that he has to be well rested for the next day). You can email me if you'd like. cathy liz me at fal con broad band dot net (without the spaces and formatted correctly, of course  )
I guess this could be, but it seems a little weird that she has been on the meds for 3 years and has never had this problem until about 2 months ago. Nothing has changed in this amount of time.. (well her meds got upped about 2 weeks ago but this started long before that.
I am just at a loss for what to do. Her dr says that since it is not a nightly thing, only about 2 times a week that she doesn't want to try anything to help her sleep. That I should just watch her more. DH and I try to go up and check on her but that wakes her up when she really is asleep. This is why I was thinking a monitor would help, so we know when she is awake and can deal with it but not wake her if she really is asleep.
Trust me I don't want to spend this money and I would love for it to be as easy as telling her she has to sleep but I am at my witts end with this. She has such an attitude on days that she says up that it ruins my outlook on the rest of the day and I end up moody for the rest of the day at work.
I totally understand not wanting to medicate if it's not nightly. I don't have any experience with monitors but I did see a video on with a small (like 3") display screen on it at either Home Depot or Lowes a couple weeks ago for I think $99. It's worth a try. Good luck. Cranky kids are the pits!
I just remembered something. The girl next door doesn't have to take meds everynight, just a few days a week. On the days where something significant has happened at school or at home, her parents make her write every single one of her thoughts in a journal. This helps her clear her mind which helps her sleep. If she still can't sleep, they give her the medicine. Just a thought...
Jordan is on Focalin XR 20 mg. She has been on Focalin for 2+ years and has never had any issues with it keeping her up. The whole staying up started about 2 months ago.
Her dr doesn't want to put her on anything to help her sleep until either it is effecting her school work or keeping her up 4 or more nights a week.
I talked to her teacher last week and she says that on the mornings that I told her she stayed up late and we had problems while getting ready for school she just kept to herself for about an hour in the morning and then she would be back to her normal self.
As I stated I really don't know what to do with her anymore because as I say she has me in tears after I drop her off on these mornings. I don't let it happen until after I drop her off but I drive to work in tears everyday she does this.
This is not the only behavior problems we are having right now but this is the worst one and makes everything else worse.
My older DD also has ADHD but they are totally different. Alexis (older dd) is very hyperactive and Jordan is inattentive. I am having a really hard time figuring out what works as far as punishments go for Jordan. Nothing seems to bother her. If i ground her she its and reads or draws. I take away toys and she doesn't even notice... Last year things got so bad with Jordan's behavior that I took everything out of her room but her bed and all she could do is read or sleep and she was totally okay with that. In fact she never even asked for her toys back.
I have started making her start relaxing at about 8 with a warm bath and milk. I have changed her reading for school time to after her bath. Any and all suggestions are welcome and appreciated.
Do you think white noise or soft music could help her? Or one of those things that they use for babies that have a soft lighted picture scene rotating on the ceiling? Something to kind of concentrate on that is soothing and calming enough to help her fall asleep?
My children fall asleep to music. I turn it off when I go to bed. I think it helps drown out some of the noise of the house since we are still up.
Also, some medications can suddenly cause different symptoms, or stop working all together.
I have a problem where my body produces too much adrenaline all the time. So I have to take nightly medication to sleep. No matter how tired I am, if I don't take it, I can't "turn off" my thoughts. I have a million different things racing through my mind. And if I finally do fall asleep, I wake every hour and a half and while I am sleeping, I have mini dreams, like the thoughts that run through my head. I can't rest. I can always tell if I've forgotten to take my medicine.
It sounds like it is more of an issue than behavior. Will she fall asleep watching television? I know there are a lot of moms on here just cringing that I mention this, but anything's better than her not sleeping at night. I know there are many times that I can't concentrate enough to read, so I'll fall asleep watching t.v. You could always buy videos or DVDs of something calm like Care Bears, or a video of baby animals geared towards younger children. Anything you don't have to concentrate much on, and that isn't loud and exciting...
My kids listen to music when they are falling asleep. Maybe try a set of headphones with a cd or a book on tape. This way she has to lay in bed to listen to it.
Whoops! I think all of us, including me, have gotten off subject here, haven't we! I'm sorry about that...
I don't really have any experiences with baby monitors, although you can get them for a much lower price than when they first came out...
Good luck!
Melatonin works wonders for sleep. It's cheap, effective and safe. One of my kids takes it every night.
Some of my girls go to bed with quiet cd's on, too.
One of them in a nighthawk, and reads til she is ready to fall asleep.
The only thing with the video monitor is that you would have to stay up til the wee hours to watch her. Is that something you want to do? If you do find she's awake, how are you going to force her to sleep? It's a tough one, because if her mind IS racing, there's really nothing you can do if you see she's awake.
Also, does she have a clock in her room? She told you it was around 3:30, but since she was so quiet, do you really think it was? My girls would all take a wild guess at the time, and wouldn't even be close.
I hope things improve soon, for both of your sakes!
I don't have a video monitor system so cannot help you there.
I do have an ADHD ds who is 14 yo now. Some of this *could* be age related?? I remember my ds going through this. So in order to let him feel in control the rule was be in bed by 8:30 pm lights out by 9 pm. If he really could not go to sleep he would come tell me. I would simply tell him that's ok, just stay in your room and read or watch tv, or listen to music until you finally do fall asleep. There were nights when he was up all night practically and he would just stay home from school that next day and rest. As long as I was communicating with his teachers about it they had NO problem at all. You cannot force them to shut off their brain. I promise it does get better with age. You have to beat them out of the bed when they are 14 yrs old. LOL He would sleep til 1pm now if we let him.
Hmmm...
I have two friends with baby moniters and neither of them love them. One bought one for the baby and thought she would put it in her sp needs daughters room, she ended up giving it away because it just wasn't great. SO I guess that is why I am problem solving.
I think it is normal for all kids to go through sleep issues. I also think you add adhd into the mix and it can be harder. For my dd, she couldn't get her mind to stop. We started having her journal at night, or we made out list for the next day. That way she didn't lay in bed and worry about what she might forget tomorrow.
Also what about foods...no caffine after 5, no sugar at night etc...maybe some of that would help.
My DD started staying awake (and sometimes til 2am) EVERY night (min of 11pm) about 1-2 months before school ended. Luckily I had the entire summer to correct her behavior. Besides getting a new brother that school year, she did have many other emotional things going on w/ her, so I was never sure what the base route was.
During summer I made sure she was in bed by 9pm unless there was something really special going on. She may or may not have gone to sleep on those nights, but at least there was no pressure like school nights. She woke no later than 8:30a and I kept her busy and active during the day as best I could.
Then when school started I got tough. I changed our dinner hour. She is bathed and done w/ dinner by 7pm. We slow down at 7pm and head to bed at 7:30pm but allowed to stay awake until 8pm. She doesn't know it, but I don't mind if it takes til 8:30 to fall asleep. She may do anything calming between 7:30 and 8pm. Then nothing, no matter what. Even if she needs water or that "mom, I gotta tell you something!" routine. Doesn't that just drive everyone crazy? I have made if very clear that all the water and "gotta tell" stuff must be done before 8pm. Otherwise it waits til morning.
For the most part we have conquered the severe sleeping disorders. The occasional up til 9pm still happens. We wake at 6am each day so every half hour missed from sleep counts.
I think we have all fallen into those bad sleeping routines in our life. Kids do it too. The trick is to just get in a few normal nights to start the normal routine again...as long as their aren't outside pressures causing it. I know that is when I have difficulties sleeping, esp if I am over tired.
Good luck to you. I know how it makes you feel to see them so tired.
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