DH and I would like to get our spiritual lives in order after several years out of the church for reasons that aren't really relative to go into. We are going to start looking for a new church. We are not at all interested in leaving Natalie in a children's church/sunday school type class, and probably wouldn't for quite some time after attending the same church. Meaning, we would need to feel pretty established in the church and comfortable with the staff and class. This presents another problem- Keeping a 2 yr old occupied during the service.

Natalie is well-behaved and quiet by nature, especially in new settings. She's the kind of child that people always comment when we are out how good she is and how pleasant she is. I've never taken a toy or activity to the grocery, in the car, or anywhere other than on a walk in her bike trailer stroller. She just seems happy watching people, talking to people,singing, or having a snack. Do any of you keep your smaller children with you during church services? If so, what kinds of things do you bring for them to do? I know she would color well, look at books,or do her magna doodle, but food isn't usually allowed in a sanctuary. Are toddlers exempt from that? Cheerios would keep her busy! She would love the praise and worship portion of the ceremony, but the sermon would just be a completely new experience for her. She's never been in a situation where she had to be quiet for that length of time. Any suggestions? What do you do or does everyone send their toddlers to a children's class? Eventually we would I'm sure, but that would be down the road. I'm guessing that it would just be like anything else...train, train, train the appropriate behavior.
In general, church tips for toddlers would be appreciated!

By Annie2 on Monday, August 28, 2006 - 10:45 pm:

You obviously know your daughter very well. Test her out in the real situation. If she does become fidgety, then one of you can take her out of the service.

By Luv2fly on Monday, August 28, 2006 - 10:47 pm:

If both of you go then perhaps one can be prepared to quickly take her out should the need arise. The churches I have attended have "crying rooms" or lobby type area that the sermon is broadcast so the parent can still listen to the message.

Coloring, books, etc that you already mentioned are great ideas.

Good luck church shopping!

By Imamommyx4 on Monday, August 28, 2006 - 11:08 pm:

Our church is Bible based but relatively contemporary. I would not normally take food into the sanctuary. But I did take Cheerios and other bite sized hand foods for dd when she was little. Sounds like you have it covered with the other things, too--coloring books, blank paper, Magna Doodle, books, dd loved to color on a tithing envelope. I figured it was a small cost for her quiet.

By Hol on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 12:34 am:

I have always believed that children don't learn how to behave in church unless they are taken to church. I, too, never trusted enough to put my children in the nursery. I wanted them with me. Debbie was really good, like it sounds like Natalie is. She would have fun cleaning out my purse, reading her own books, or colouring.

Danny was a little more restless, but he just wanted to be held, so that's what I did. Some people would tap me on the shoulder and "inform" me where the nursery was, but I would just smile, thank them, and keep him with me.

Once they got old enough for Sunday School (about age four), I let them go to class, but only after I had gotten to know the teachers.

I also didn't want to use the nursery because most of the churches we attended in the course of our military travels, operated on a reciprosity schedule. If you were a parent who used the nursery, then you had to sign up to work in it. I always felt like I went to church to be in church. If I wanted to babysit, I could stay home. The church we belong to now has a PAID nursery person, who is an RN. She may have teenage girls volunteer to help her, but she is in charge so no one HAS to take nursery duty.

If people don't understand, then too bad, in my opinion. We were all children once. Jesus forbid his disciples to shoo the little children away.

One word about colouring, tho: I am an usher at my church. One of our duties is to clean up the sanctuary after the service; i.e. gather up the bulletins, put the hymnals back in the pew racks, etc. We have discovered that some parents have allowed their kids to crayon in the hymnals, or even on the pews. If they are going to use crayons, they need a close eye on them.

By Dawnk777 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 06:26 am:

Sarah did go to the nursery, when she was little, but she handled that well, and it really wasn't a problem. As Emily got older, she really never got to go to the nursery, because she would stay relatively quiet during church and could occupy herself nicely with a coloring book (in fact, she still doodles during church.)

People at my church bring cheerios, or other hand-held treats, for little ones during church. I did too, until the day I managed to grab the ziploc bag the wrong way and spilled cheerios all over the brick floor. My kids were a little older and that's when I decided my kids really didn't need treats in church anymore! LOL! although, I sure can't remember anymore how old they were (I'm sure Emily was older than 2 or 3, though!)

By Kittycat_26 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 07:12 am:

Our minister was really good when we started going back to church. Timmy was about 2 and rather filled with energey 24 hours a day. He told me that if he could definately talk over a 2 year old if the situation arose. However, Timmy would never learn if we didn't try.

Some Sundays are better than others. Some people are more tolerant than others. But we all weren't ALWAYS perfect.

By Juli4 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 07:57 am:

my two year old is very social and when we walk into church or someone stands to say something then she will sometimes just say "hi josh" or something like that where most people can hear her. People just chuckle and go on. Other times she just talks loud and forgets to whisper about the second after I tell her to whisper. So you can only expect so much out of some two year olds. We do not have a nursery worker though. The parents keep their kids in church and if they need to be taken out then the parent does it. They do however have Sunday school and then the kids go into to church for singing and everytrhing and right before the preaching 4-12 year olds go to their own class. The kids like it and get to be in church a little also. Evening services though the kids just sit in church. I would not think that bringing cheerios is a problem. I don't know though. Some churches are different.

By Tink on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 10:13 am:

My children stay in church with me. Our church provides a clipboard with coloring pages, a short bible story and crayons to help keep the children occupied during the sermon, if parents choose to keep them out of Children's Church. My youngest is like Juli's and will talk to some of the other attendees but she's learning when it is and isn't appropriate. My dks have a children's Bible that they can look through while the sermon is going on, lots of pictures and sometimes they can follow along with the service's scripture. When my dks were younger, I did bring Cheerios or goldfish crackers in with us. I know that I'm more concerned with my children's behavior than anyone else at the service and many people have told me that the quiet talking doesn't disturb them at all. Of course, I go to a very family friendly, slightly more casual church.

By Debbie on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 11:15 am:

My dks go to church with us. When they were little, I always had a bag with books, coloring books, and crayons. My oldest always did fine. Now, my youngest had a hard time for awhile because he was so active. If he got too rowdy, dh would take him out for awhile, and then he was fine when he came back. We also had a deal that we would go out for pancakes(his favorite breakfast) if he behaved.

By Reds9298 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 02:28 pm:

Thank you ladies! Having spent a lot of time in church, but never with a toddler (LOL), I wanted to make sure those quiet activities for her were appropriate. I do feel like we know her behavior very well, and we will probably be a lot more anxious than necessary, but that will subside with time I guess. I'm also glad to hear that I'm not the only one who isn't interested in sending her to the children's room! We thought we might be a little overprotective, but we still wouldn't send her there. And I agree - the only way she will learn the correct behavior is to be in the service. I'm sure we will sit near the end of a pew or toward the back for quite some time...easy escape if necessary. I can't imagine her crying or throwing a fit, just talking too loud or too much.

Thank you.

By Juli4 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 03:51 pm:

If she tends to be active then make sure she is in between the two of you with room to move around. I have one that will leave the pew when we are not looking if no one is there. She is just active. With our oldest and middle one though it wasn't a problem. Good luck.

By Dawnk777 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 06:54 pm:

Kids leave pews on occasion, where we go to church. Our sanctuary isn't all that big, though, and they couldn't get too far away. Parents usually come and get them, though.

We do have a children's sermon every week and then there is a sermon time, for young kids, where they get to hear a bible story and color a picture. This is new, though. They didn't have it, when my kids were young enough for it!

By Reds9298 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 07:06 pm:

I meant for us to "escape" WITH her...like take her out. She's not really physically active.

By Dawnk777 on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 07:52 pm:

Well, yeah, that too! We usually sat in the back, so if we needed to leave quickly, we could.

By Hol on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 - 10:05 pm:

At one of the churches that we went to years ago, a little boy escaped from the nursery. I guess it was supposed to be supervised by teenagers. They found him wandering around the parking lot. He was only about two at the time. When I heard that, any thought I might have had about using the nursery was over. Yikes!!!

By Dawnk777 on Wednesday, August 30, 2006 - 02:31 am:

Wow, no kids ever escaped whenever I watched the nursery!