Some of you know that we just moved to the St. Louis area. Well, dh's boss just called and said that she was giving him the Oklahoma City office, in addition to his current one. If only this could have happened 2 months ago!! Urg! She told him that she knew I was going to kill her, but that they would offer us full relocation if we wanted to move there. We also have the option of staying where we are, it is up to us. So, now I am torn. We just moved here a month ago. But, we really wanted to get further south. Oklahoma City is only 2-1/2 hours from my brother, and my parents have been thinking of moving to the lake up that way since my Dad is now retired. So, we would only be about an hour from them. Relocation is usually good for a year, so dh is trying to find out if we could have the year to decide. I cringe at the idea of packing and moving again since we haven't even unpacked yet! But, then I think, heck, we haven't done anything to the house, we haven't registered our cars, gotten our driver's licences, school hasn't started, I haven't found doctors, so what would it matter. I just don't know what to do! Any advice, what are your thoughts!

By Pamt on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 03:14 pm:

I think the kids would be the key consideration. Moving, esp. for kids, is considered the second most stressful event in life second only to the death of a close family member. How would they feel about it? Obviously, they haven't started school or anything yet so that makes it a little easier, but I would definitely take their input into consideration. Can your DH find a different job? This company seems like they jerk him (and your family) around an awful lot. You move more than military families it seems. Can you be assured that if you move to OKC that it would be permanent? Very tough situation!! Good luck!

By Tarable on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 03:27 pm:

I think that if I had the choice of moving right now or in a year in your situation I would choose to get it over with since your kids have not been to another school or anything like that yet. You also said you are not finished unpacking so that would make packing even easier. If this is something that you are going to end up deciding to do in a year anyway I would do it before school starts so that you don't have to go through the had part of relocating your kids to new schools so often. I would also ask for some sort of reassurance that you are not going to be asked to relocate again for some time.. a few years anyway.

That would be a hard decision and I would ask the kids but I think (JMHO) that for thier sake it would be easier to just have to learn one new school in the next year instead of 2 if you waited to move until next summer.

Good luck with what you decide.

By Reds9298 on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 03:31 pm:

Oh dear! Good luck with whatever you decide!! I think I would agree with Tarable...it would be much easier to do it now than later. Easier on the kids, too. Tough choice! I hope it works out for the best! Some jobs just require regular relocation, even though it's a pain.

By Crystal915 on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 03:39 pm:

I think if you are going to move (and remember I'm a military spouse, I know it's stressful!!!!) it'd be better to do it before school starts. Switching schools often can be hard on kids, I know a lot of soldiers who were military brats, and their education was messed up from moving so much, not to mention the stress of leaving friends. I'm sorry you are faced with this decision, I know it's gotta be tough!!

By Debbie on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 04:21 pm:

Pam, in defense of the company, this last move was the only move we did not have a choice in. All the other moves, dh put in for a promotion and got it.It involved moving, but we knew that ahead of time. They are not forcing us to move this time, his job is actually more stable now because he has both the St. Louis and Oklahoma City offices. We just have the choice to live either place. The reason he was given the office is that his boss was forced to go down 1 director. She decided to let go of the Oklahoma City director(his results were low) and give the office to my dh. So, they aren't really jerking us around.

School doesn't start there until Aug. 21st, so I could have us in temp housing(at least) by then, so the boys can start on the 1st day of school. I researched the area already because we thought we might be moved there when the St. Louis situation happened. So, I know what schools are good and the areas we would be interested in looking at. We have only actually been in this house 2 weeks(gone to my parents for 1 other week) My boys haven't made new friends yet, etc. So, I am not that worried about their reaction. My oldest told me the other day that he wants to be closer to my parents and brother. If we move, this will be a place that we see ourselves staying. Dh loves his job again, so that is not a problem. We aren't out anything either, the company pays for everything, buys our house for what we paid, and will pack us. Also, housing is cheaper there. We could get a comparable house for $40,000-60,000 less.

The more I think about it, the more I think we should just do it. We have until Wed. to decide.

By Breann on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 04:34 pm:

I think that the timing sounds perfect. You haven't settled in yet, so if you feel that OK is a better place to be, now is the time to do it.

Once the kids make friends, start school, get doctors and teachers, it will be harder on them.

I guess I would just ask myself which place I would rather raise my family. You are lucky to have the choice

While I do agree that moving can upset children, I don't think that it's a gigantic big deal. As long as they are loved and have a strong support system behind them, they will usually be just fine. Look at all the "army brats" that have turned out just fine ;)

By Kate on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 06:14 pm:

I would totally do it. It sounds perfect and while the timing could have been better (as in a few months ago!!) the timing is still pretty good since things are still packed and friends haven't been made and school hasn't started. Look at it the house in St. Louis as staying in a hotel for the moment while you househunt in Oklahoma City. Besides....the looks on the neighbor's faces when the 'For Sale' sign goes up will be priceless. We had that happen across the street....within four weeks of moving in the people decided they HATED our town and wanted to go back home (we were thrilled they were leaving) and what a surprise it was!! Cars would slow down, confusion would be on people's faces...it was amusing.

Also...your husband would be keeping his current income, correct? And the move is to a lower cost of living area? You'll make out financially, too! Go for it! Now!

By Kaye on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 06:15 pm:

I would move again. The reality is you haven't settled in, if you wait a year or two, you will either have settled in or lived a year or two in limbo. I would just do it! I too have moved a lot. A couple of things I would consider. If your hubby lost his job, is he employable in ok city, or is at least equal to st louis? What is the cost of living difference. It does seem to make good sense to live where your money goes the farthest, or at least close to the same. We have lived far from family and close to family and I would always pick to be close to family if all other things are equal. I live in houston and really hate it, but for a tx job this is where we will be.

By Ginny~moderator on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 06:33 pm:

I would move now, so your kids don't have to go through the problems of a new school this year and again a year from now, and making friends this year and having to move away from them and have to make new friends again a year from now. And with being so much closer to family, that should help with the transition.

Yes, moving is the absolute pits. But I still think it would be better to make the move now. And if you still have lots of stuff in boxes, that's less to pack. But, can you find permanent housing rather than temporary housing? That would obviously be the best arrangement. You've already done the research, so you know what areas you are looking at and what you're looking for, and from what you say, the cost of living will be lower too, which is an added reason to do it.

By Mom2three1968 on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 08:09 pm:

hi debbie,

I agree with everyone else if they will move you and you haven't changed anything over, and also you little ones would be happier being closer to your family and it's cheaper to live there that's what I would do, and you have a month before school starts!! If you don't mind my asking what company does your husband work for? We live in ofallon, il not far from you. If you dont want to post the company here would you email me? cicco68@charter.net

thank you,
kelly

By Debbie on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 08:30 pm:

We are moving! We decided to do it now, for all the reasons you mentioned. Dh told his boss before he left today. I actually just got off the phone with the realtor. We are going house hunting next weekend. My parents are meeting us there, so they can swim at the hotel with the boys and watch them during the time we are out looking for a house.

We are going to try and get into the house by the middle of August. We may have to go into a hotel for a week or two if we can't close in time. The company will load us and keep our stuff in storage for that time. They started the paperwork today, so we will get our $$ for house hunting next week. We told the boys at dinner. They were actually pretty happy about it!! My oldest is a little sad because he is signed up to play football for the first time this year. They start practice in a few weeks. But, I told him we would find somewhere there to play. The cost of living there is cheaper. And, as far as the job market, it isn't any different there, then in St. Louis. So, it just makes sense. Also, the school district we are going into is one of the best. I kind of feel like it was meant to be because if it would have been a few months later(after school started) we may not have even given it a thought. So, it looks like we will be moving again, in a month or so.

By Kate on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 08:54 pm:

Congrats! Now do tell if your new St. Louis neighbors go into shock.

By Pamt on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 09:07 pm:

Glad you came to a decision so easily. Whew! That must be a relief. Happy househunting!

By Nicki on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 09:07 pm:

It sure sounds like you made the right decision! Family is so important. Glad you'll be closer. And your boys will be in time for school to start, and hopefully your oldest will still be able to join a football team. Just wish we could help you pack and move!

By Mommmie on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 09:16 pm:

I would have moved, too. How exciting for y'all to be closer to family!

By Karen~admin on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 09:26 pm:

Good luck with the move! I agree, do it now!

By Dawnk777 on Friday, July 14, 2006 - 11:58 pm:

Moving now, before you are settled seems like the best choice to me, too.

By Hol on Saturday, July 15, 2006 - 12:08 am:

I'm happy for you. I think you made the right decision.

By Conni on Saturday, July 15, 2006 - 10:00 am:

Wow! That's pretty crazy. I am glad you came to a decision as well!! Good luck house hunting!


BTW, I am in OKC several times a yr. Either passing thru to go se family or taking the kids and my sis kids to white water. You will like it there. And I will email you the next time I am headed that way- would love to meet you for lunch.

By Insaneusmcwife on Saturday, July 15, 2006 - 11:13 am:

I think you made the right choice. I would have made the same one. Atleast you were given the choice and it was at a good time since you hadn't settled in. I brought the kids from Okinawa on orders to Pendleton. I got a really good job, got ds set up in school, dd with daycare, found doctors, unpacked and got the last picture hung up in our apartment (still had the hammer in my hand) and the phone rang, it was dh telling me his orders had changed he would not be checking into Pendleton and that I needed to start packing because he would be home in a month to get us and move us to 29 Palms. I didn't let him know that it bothered me but when I hung up the phone I sat on the couch and cried for about 30 min, then I ran out to the dumpster and dug my boxes back out and started packing again.