Furnace/Heating problems.....UGH
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For the past 2 weeks or so when our furnace starts it has been making an out of the ordinary noise. Dh and I, both of us knowing nothing about furnaces and not having the money for a service call to a repair man, have been hoping with both fingers crossed that the furnace would at least last the winter. Well, last night after everyone else went upstairs to bed and I stayed downstairs giving Josh his bedtime bottle I noticed that it seemed a bit chilly so I turned the heat up a little. I did'nt think much of it, I dozed off on the couch and woke at about midnight pretty cold. I turned the heat up a bit more and waited and waited for it to "kick in". I stood over the vent in the kitchen for at least 30 min. and nothing..no heat. I went back to the dial and turned it up to 85 degrees!! Finally, after about another 15-20 min. I could hear the furnace come on, but the blower only blowed out warm air for about 20 seconds then it made a humming sound until I heard nothing. I waited on the kitchen floor between 1am and 3am, praying, crying, just hoping that some warm air would start coming through the vent, but nothing. The weird thing is that I can hear the furnace come on every so often but the blower does'nt come on, so no air comes out. I think the blower has actually came on maybe 3 times since about 1am last night. I've been turning on the oven once in awhile when things get too cold. Fortunately, it's warmer outside today (in the 40's) so the house is'nt too cold, but it's supposed to drop back down into the 20's tomorrow. I broke down and called a repair man about 8:45 this morning and told him whats going on and that I have 4 kids the youngest being just 7weeks old and that I can't go without heat. He said he'd send someone right over, it's now 11:30 and nobody has shown up. I have to get this fixed before the sun goes down or it will get too cold to sleep here tonight. Boy oh boy, when it rains it pours. I needed this to happen like I need another hole in my head. I finally got about 3 hours of sleep, on the couch cuddling with Joshua before I had to get the boys up for school. Now Josh won't nap for very long, and Cassidy is so needy that she won't let me nap either. Oh well. I'm supposed to call my in-laws and let them know what happens with the furnace and we are to go there tonight if we need to. I'm pretty bummed about the whole ordeal. I pray that the repair man lets us make payments cause we dont have the money upfront to cover this. We've spent almost 200 in the last week on mom's utilites and we don't have any left for this. And my car insurance has stopped cause of non-payment so I have to figure out how to budget that into our next paycheck, God forbid one of us wrecks or gets hit between now and then! One good thing, we got approved for some food stamps. We've never qualified in the past, but all my dh's overtime was taken away and with the new baby making our household size larger we now qualify. I'm not sure how much we'll get but anything will help us right now. Life sucks so much sometimes, I want to crawl in a hole and not worry about anything for awhile but we all know that is'nt possible. Thanks for the venting 
Hi Mara,
AWFUL!!!!!!!!!! but There is help.
Call local department of social services, Salvation Army, Red Cross, Public Service Commission. Tell them what you told the repairman and us. No money, no heat, 7week old baby and 3 other kids, qualified for food stamps, mom just passed away - say "Please help me" Don't leave the phone until they do. Social worker at hospital where you gave birth can also sometimes help.
Praying, stay in touch,
Linda
Mara, I hope everything works out for you with your furnace. Let us know how this turns out, and in the meantime I'll be praying for you.
http://www.fns.usda.gov/wic/
That is the wic program. Hopefully something helps.
Hi Mara,
What happened? Is there any way we can help?
Linda
yes Mara, please check in with us, you are on SO many or our minds and prayer lists ..... if you haven't found help yet, let us know, we'll keep brainstorming for you !!!!!
Mara - Just wanted to let you know we are thinking about you. (((Hugs)))
About 4:30pm that Friday, the repair man came and replaced our furnace blower. They wanted payment up front, but after explaining that we did'nt have all of it but needed heat cause of having the little ones they cut us a deal and let us pay half then and we'll give them the other half next Monday. The total was 317.00. This caused us to not have money to pay our 355.00 gas bill. Pretty ironic that we had to pay to fix the thing that we cant afford to have work. So, once again my in-laws offered to pay the gas bill. We will owe them a huge chunk of our tax return, but at least it is getting paid. I was so depressed about the furnace breaking but dh reminded me that we should be thankful that at least we did have heat, and it was taken care of. So I guess he has a point, things could have been worse. I have to drive to my dh work, about 40 min. away and pick get his paycheck from him today. I have to get it to the bank before 2pm or the check we gave the repair man will overdraft us. Will there ever be light at the end of the road? I went back to work yesterday after being out since the week before Thanksgiving. That will help a little, I don't get a lot of hours, but every little bit helps. Thanks for the suggestions from everyone. Joshua already is on the WIC program, thanks Feona. We'll make it, we always do.
Mara
((Mara)) hope things turn around for you soon. I am glad you have heat now.
Mara,
Glad you have heat now but still check out the other resources. They will often pay a bill to help so you wouldn't have to incur more debt.
Your in my thoughts and prayers
One Day at a Time,
Linda
how's it going now ?
I know your in-laws get on your nerves, different values, priorities, etc ... but I'm thankful that you have them and that your kids have them also. It's taken me years to be truly thankful for my m-i-l, again, different priorities, values, etc, but I have no family to give my children and in the beginning I was just thankful that my kids had at least 'some' family, now I'm thankful for all of us. We don't always see eye to eye but I genuinely love her and I'm glad she's who she is for my Dh, kiddos and for me too.
I'm glad they were there for you, don't forget 'this too shall pass'. I'm really not just throwing words your way, I promise, life will get better. Personally, this past year has been the darkest time of my life, and while the pain doesn't actually go away, somehow my capacity to deal with it has gotten larger. I'll pray for that for you as well.
Check with those agencies, spend a bit of time on the phone, call the LARGE churches in your town, you'll find they have a great list of resources they'll share with you. Many of us have been right where you are, that's how we know who you can turn to.
Remember to let us know how you're doing, ok?
Things are better, they aren't great but they are better. Yes, my MIL does get under my skin, BUT she and my FIL are HUGE helps when we need it. They have helped us financially many times. My MIL is a great person, she tells me that she loves me all the time and she helps in anyway they can. It's just her ways...it's hard to explain. She is VERY blunt and to the point, reguardless of others feelings. She is VERY loud and obnoxious. That is just her. I'm not used to that. I come from a very quite family and she is definitly NOT quite LOL. I do appreciate them a lot, and I tell them that. Honestly, I'm probebly the one with the problem. I need to just come to terms that we are different people and we just do things differently,,,not better, just different.
The last week for me has been rough. I've started craving opiates again. I've not acted on my cravings but I've been getting them often. I talked to my councoler about this yesterday. I told her that I've come too far with my decrease and I don't want to raise my dose. I know what has brought these feelings on, it's stress from losing mom, stress from my brother, money stress, new baby stress, no sleep, having 4 kids, being majorly depressed. All of the above have made me feel weak and looking for a quick fix to make me feel better. But, I know that drugs are only a short pick me up, and that after the high you fall hard. A relaspe is'nt worth everything I've worked on and my family deserves me to stay clean. It could be so easy to slip, I have every excuse to allow it to happen. I almost tell myself that I deserve to feel good just one more time....addiction is so very hard to overcome. But, I'm still clean and plan on staying that way. I'ts VERY hard sometimes. I want to start my taper again and get off the methadone completely, but I have to get past these feelings before I can do that or a relaspe would most definately happen. I'm going to talk with my family doc. about either an increase in my antidepressant or a switch of medication. If I could just get a stronger hold on that I know other things will fall into place easier. Thanks to everyone! You truly are a great bunch of ladies! Thanks for thinking about me and the prayers. It's nice knowing that there ARE people out there who do care for other people. Thanks
Mara
I just want to let you know that I'm thinking about you and praying for you, Mara. I know that this isn't easy for you and that you deserve a great deal of credit for staying clean. I'm praying for strength for you to continue the fight.
Mara- is there someone you can talk to on a daily basis when you need to ?
I know you mentioned your counselor and family doc, but they'll charge an arm and a leg for daily therapy .... what about one of those ...a-nons ? Not sure what it would be called, but I think you get paired up with someone.
OR are you involved in a church or is someone in your family involved ? Pastors are usually available night and day and he would have the resources to give you assistance AND he might be able to pair you up with someone (kinda like an emotional mentor) because he's privy to so much private information about members of his church .... it's worth a shot ....
Just don't keep trying, don't give up, and keep your eye on the goal ... remember, even when you can't do it "for yourself" you can do it for your kids ..... your mom's looking down on you right now and I'd say she's mighty proud ..... !!!!!
I don't have any experience with methodone, but you are obviously going through alot with your new baby and the loss of you mother and having four children and more.
Your mom is definitley there with you trying to help.
Any other support you can get would help amazing. Your cravings with pass.
Not that this is the time, because it totally isn't but there is a new drug for getting off opiates. I was watching it on tv, but it is expensive and you definitely need insurance for it. It was like $150 or more a week or a month. I forget the name. I think your counselor would know the name. Not for people on opiates for along time. But perhaps for you when you get to a low dose of methodone. Ask your counselor. I was watching a show on HBO on drug addiction.
If posting here is helpful please do but I gave you another message board on narotics anonymous that I pray will help too.
http://na.activeboard.com/
If you would like me to find you on line meetings I will try to do that. I know there are alot of meetings for AA online.
There should be phone meetings for narcotics or drugs anonymous. If you are interested give a shout out.
I would definitely listen to the advice of the counselor. But I hear you are trying to decrease the methodone and I know that is hard.
I had a friend who was a school teacher who was in the methodone program and in AA. She said it was so hard to go down. But she was doing very well on the methodone program for the five year that I knew her. She really liked being able to function.
Feona,
I actually spoke to my councoler about the other drug you mentioned. It's called Suboxone. I'm only on 28 mil. of methadone and I could switch to Suboxone now, but like you said it is very pricey. Methadone is also expensive, but Suboxone is even more so. You are also correct that it IS very hard to come off methadone and there is a high rate of failure for those who do stop it, BUT that is usually the case of decreasing too quickly or "jumping off" too high a dose. With methadone you must decrease VERY slowly, like 1-2 mil. a week or bi-weekly, you have to do it so slow so your body can keep up with the changes. I've went from 65 to 28 and have had no problems until now and I absolutly think it is because of the depression. I'm doing much better yesterday and today. The thoughts are still there but they aren't strong. It's the days when I'm feeling really down that I feel like using again. One day at a time. I go to the doctor today for Joshua's check up and I plan on discussing my antidepressant and see what she thinks. The appointment that I had with the attorney and my brother went well, better than I expected anyway. My brother told her that he did'nt want his entire portion of his inheritance, he feels that I should be intitled to more of it than he is. She said we can make up a "family agreement" and make that happen if that is what he wants. He said after the house sells then he will say what he is asking for, so I don't know if it will be 40% or 30 or 20 or what? I know it won't be 50% anyway. I'm so glad the stress of that is almost behind me, my brother hugged me and told me that he loved me and that made a world of difference. I was so afraid that he would be difficult- more often than not money can bring out the worst in people.
About attending AA or NA. There are groups in my town that meet weekly but I've never gone to one. The reason is NA looks down on those that take methadone. I've heard that AA is more accepting of it but NA doesn't consider you clean if you are taking methadone. Methadone is an opiate and they feel that if you are still taking an opiate than you are still "using". They don't see it as a tool to help you off other drugs. The thing with methadone is your body adjusts to it rather quickly, so after a week or so on a stable dose you will no longer "feel" it. It works to keep you sick from withdraw, it keeps you from doing illegal activities to get drugs, it allows you to function normally like go to work, take care of your home and family, everything that anyone else can do without the addict type lifestyle. I feel no different after I take it than I did before I take it. That is why people quit it too soon thinking that they are "cured". Some people find that staying on methadone indefinatly is the best for them. Some decide to stay on it for a lifetime, because they know that their lives are so much better and they don't want to chance going back to the other lifestyle. For me, I don't want to have to take anything forever if I don't have to. That is why I'm trying to taper slowly. This medication has helped me get my life together, but I want the chance to try and do it on my own without drug treatment. I'm not sure why I'm even going on and on about it. Usually when I speak to people about it I'm always having to defend myself and defend this medication, there are so many that feel this is the wrong way to acheive sobriaty, but I feel that ANY way you can get and stay clean is the best way. What works for one does'nt always work for all. Anyway, that's my post for now! LOL Sorry it turned into a book! You all honestly make me feel so much better and writing and sharing my feelings helps me a great deal.
Mara - I think you are an inspiration to anyone. Only you knows what is best for you and your family. Hold you head up high and be darn proud of what you have achieved. You have nothing to be ashamed of.
If you ever need someone to vent to off board my email is d p 4 voll ey ball at g mail dot com.
(((Hugs)))
The girl I spoke about was in AA but she didn't discuss methadone because as you know everyone has their opinions and not all of them are helpful.
She considered herself clean on Methodone and she was. This was in brooklyn, ny.
It is nobodys business if you take methodone. It is helping you and that is the end of it.
My friend didn't talk about it because people would judge her.
As she said she got her head out of the toilet (literally)
and went to work and took care of her child.
That is amazing you have gone down so much. I think you are very motivated.
I second Feona .....
This seems to work for you, stick with it, until you decide to do something differently. Even if you stay on it, you have obviously made the choice to put your family and your life as your top priority and because of this med you are able to do it. THAT is highly commendable.
We all have crutches, we all need support, take what you can use and is helpful from those other programs and leave what is painful alone.
It would be GREAT if you could find someone else ahead of you in this game to be a source of inspiration and support, I thought that was the biggie with those other programs, they pair you up with someone. Maybe that other webiste would have something like that for you.
You're HUGE in our book, so keep updating us, you have come a LONG way, and you have made so many people so proud of you, you are a source of inspration to others, and just think how important you are to your kids, you're an inspiration to them, they are just too young to know it yet !!!
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