I am taking my kids off the bus
Moms View Message Board: General Discussion: Archive October 2004:
I am taking my kids off the bus
I don't know if ya'll remember me telling you about how horrible the bus ride has been for both of my kids so far this year.
There are a set of 4th grade twins that get on the bus and immediately start swearing,I mean really filthy words. They hit kids with their book bags all the way down the isles. They get their pencils extremely sharp and stab kids with them. They punch kids, antagonize them with words just to start a fight. Scotty sits with a boy in his class who is one of his good friends and they read their books and talk quietly. Today they called Scotty's friend, who is black, a long list of expletives that ended with the "n" word. We have tried to teach Scotty to not be provoked by words. He is only allowed to defend himself if someone is physically threatening him. I suggested that he pass that advice along to his friend and not let words get to him. Sometimes that is easier said than done.
When those little heathens get off the bus, they throw handfuls of rocks in the bus windows and hit kids in the head with them.
There was also a 3rd grader who punched Scotty (6th grade) in the face because Scotty's book bag got tangled with his. Now the kids big brother wants to beat Scotty up.
I have been to the school and they are aware of the little trouble makers. They claim they are building a case against them to get them permanently kicked off the bus, but it is a long process.
I have worked something out with my friend who picks her son up every afternoon. I will take the kids to school and she agreed to pick them up for me. I offered to pay her for going out of her way, but she refused. She lives about 5 minutes away from us anyway.
I feel so relieved! I was afraid to ask her because I did not want to inconvenience her, but she is more than happy to help me out.
It also relieves me from trying to monitor Gabe sitting with the problem child from next door.
Yay! 
Sounds like you have it all worked out! What a shame you had to though, what little monsters. Build a case? sounds like they have one already, it really stinks when bad kids make the good ones have to go out of their way or make their parents make other arrangements because they can't be good.
What an awful situation! It really stinks that these troublemakers have made you work so hard to provide alternative transportation to school but I would try to do the same in your shoes. I'm glad that a safe and mutually attractive arrangement was possible.
My dd was the only girl out of 12 to board the bus last year! I told her not to let anyone bother her, but she's sensitive and takes it all too seriously. I did go out to the bus stop with her usually, but once a kid punched her in the ribs very hard, and we had to have a talk with his dad! The school meted out the same punishment for both of them (unbelievable- since we had to get her checked out at the ER- bruised ribs!)because she had hit him with a 2oz. bookbag first when he was teasing her. We went round & round with that principal- another long story...anyway, this year she's in middle school which is close enough for her to walk or ride her bike. THANK GOODNESS her dad can give her a ride when it's raining or too cold! The school said that they are not responsible for what happens on the bus- so you may have to take it up with their parents! WHY CAN'T ANYONE TAKE SERIOUS MEASURES TO AVOID THE BULLIES AND VIOLENCE IN THE FIRST PLACE?!! when I was in school- we had bus monitors- maybe that should come back!
The school is not responsible for what happens on the bus? Outrageous!!! If it were me, I'd attend the next school board meeting and raise the issue. If the school is not responsible,who is? The bus company? If the school is "making a case" for getting those kids off the bus, they are taking some responsibility, but doing it slowly and with little effect.
One would like to think, after Columbine and other school shootings and all the publicity there has been about the dangers of bullying, that schools would work harder to be on top of that. The way your school is reacting is, and Dawn's, is just plain stupid and they deserve to be held to account for their stupidity.
When my oldest was attending a special ed school he had problems with a kid on the bus. I complained but nothing was done, and one day the other boy hit Don in the face. ER visit, x-rays to check for concussion, bruises and swelling, and broken glasses. I called and wrote to the school the next day to tell them that Don would not be on the bus until the other boy was off. I did not drive or own a car and there was no parent nearby to work out a ride with and no public transportation anywhere near this school. A week later I got a call from the school saying that Don was a truant. I repeated what I had said, that he would not be on the bus until (a) the boy who injured him was off and I demanded compensation for the ER bill and the glasses. They said they would have to take me to court for the truancy and I said fine, I'll tell the judge what happened. They said they couldn't take the other boy off the bus and my costs were, if anything, the responsibility of the other boy's parents and I would have to sue them. I repeated my position and urged them to take me to court. A few days later I received a letter that the other boy had been removed from the bus and a check was enclosed (on the school's account) for my out of pocket costs. Don was on the bus the next day and reported the other boy was nowhere in sight, on the bus or at the school. But, this was a private special ed school, it was over 30 years ago, and I was a founding member and board member of a well-known school advocacy group.
I do think, however, that bringing such incidents into the public light, at a school board meeting, a PTA meeting, and even in the local newspapers, could have some results - most likely positive. School boards and principals don't like to have public talk about their failures to deal with bullying.
I don't know about everywhere else, but where I live, the Transportation Dept. of the local school board is responsible for the buses and bus drivers.
When my kids were young we also had some problems with bullies on the bus. The bus drivers here are pretty strict and adhere to the board rules fairly well. That sort of continuing behavior would never be tolerated. They write them up for things even I think are too trivial, but hey, it keeps ALL the kids safe that way.
However, on more than one occasion, I've been to school board meetings, and had quite a few phone conversations and written a letter to the head of the school board when we did have problems.
If your school bus system is actually a part of your school board, show up at a meeting, call the school board president, make some noise! They HAVE a case against the little monsters. Sounds like someone is afraid to step on their parents' toes. I'd certainly be the *squeaky wheel* and be heard. No one's kids should have to be subjected to that.
IMO what you are describing is beyond just normal kids will be kids and more like assault. I would try one more time w/ the school and inform them that if one more incident involving my child and these little bullies occured I would be calling the cops first and then the paper. And then I would follow up on it. You are in fact doing them a favor to get your school district off their cans. If something horrible ever happened the school district would be liable for gillions of $ and they would have no defense of "gee we didnt know".
I think that you all gave me some great advice. I am very tempted to write the newspaper and expose our district's bus problem. My friend that picks them up took her kid off the bus(different route) because a high school kid got into a fight with him. The superintendent told her that they could not guarantee his safety on the bus.
It is such a shame that a few bad kids can spoil it for the whole bunch.
|
Members
