I'm just curious, for those of you who have taken antidepressants, how do you decide if you need them? If they would help or not?

I've had a really rough week this week. DH has been working long hours. I am still sick and have been all week, and so was DD. It was all really overwhelming.

I was supposed to travel up North this weekend and I worked myself up into a panic attack because I was so stressed out about going. Now, logically, I know I shouldn't be getting worked up over something like that. But with my Mom sick and now my Grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. I just can't handle anything more.

A very close friend of mine called me today and a lot sank in from talking to her. (Thank God for good friends!) She just reminded me of all I have been through. She said that it may feel like the little things, but that it's probably a commulation of all that has happened, all the people I have lost, the miscarriages.

I feel more overwhelmed and unable to handle things than depressed. I'm just trying to make sense of it all! I went in for a physical and the Dr. asked me how I was doing with it all, and I lied and said "Oh, ok, I think. I have a few issues with anxiety." I need to call him again, so maybe I'll talk to him about it.

Does anyone have any words of wisdom? Therapy is in my thought process, so I won't be offended if you think I need it.

By Bea on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 05:24 pm:

I totally believe in a combination of medication, therapy and support groups.

There's an old AA cliché's which says "Let Go and Let God."

It basically means that there are so many things in life that we have no control over. Understand this fact.

By Cat on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 05:29 pm:

Eve, I think your doctor's a great place to start. He/She may refer you to someone more specialized, and that's okay--good actually. I've never been on antidepressants, but have known quite a few people that have. Bea's got great advise. You really have been through a lot lately. Asking for help is NOT a sign of weakness. Quite the opposite, actually. {{{{{Eve}}}}} We're always here for ya.

By Ginny~moderator on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 06:37 pm:

Sounds like you have short term and long term stress. I don't believe in anti-depressants for short term stress because the stress will go away. For long term stress, I'd ask the doc for a referral for counseling, or go through your church, and talk with a counselor a couple of times, specifically asking if an anti-depressant would be a good idea.

I have taken anti-depressants, and when I needed them they helped. One of the periods when I take them is winter, as I have SADS (lack of daylight, getting up and coming home in the dark depresses me) and they have helped. I remember a period several years ago when I was going through a long period of depression related to marital stress and the anti-depressant helped keep me on an even keel and helped me work my way out of it. I still remember walking to work one day and thinking "I must have forgotten my sunglasses" - and suddenly realized that the fog of depression had lifted and the world was bright again. What a joy!

By Ginny~moderator on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 06:39 pm:

Or, maybe you need an anti-anxiety medication, which may not be the same as an anti-depressant. Either way, I recommend counseling first or along with any medication, and am glad your thoughts are in that direction. Too many people shy away from counseling and I think it is essential for the kind of situation you describe. I have had both short and long term counseling and always found it very helpful.

By Mommyathome on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 07:03 pm:

After losing both of my parents, having a new baby (and a 1 year old at my side), having a huge fall-out with my inlaws, and my DH losing his job.....I hit a wall. It was like I couldn't get away from all the negativity going on in my life. It seemed like the world was falling in around me.
My doctor prescribed an antidepressant/anxiety-panic disorder medication. It was wonderful. It really gave me the strength to see beyond what was happening. That was about 5 years ago. I used them at that time for about 12 months before weaning off of them.
Last year I started having anxiety/panic attacks again. I ended up in the hospital once (via ambulance.....*so embarrasing!*). After a long visit with my Dr., he prescribed a med for panic/anxiety disorder. It is also used for depression, but I didn't have that problem at all. The Dr had me list everything that was on my "plate of life". Once I had it all written down, I saw that it was way too full. He recommended that I get rid of some of my stress in order to overcome the "stress induced anxiety". He prescribed medication. I've been taking it about 9 months or so. It, again, has been terrific. That, along with getting rid of some of my responsibilities, and a very supportive DH has made all the difference in the world to me.
I highly recommend seeing your doctor. Just spill it all out. That's what they are there for. Trust me, I was in tears nearly the entire time I was in his office. He was very understanding.
My doctor also recommended counseling/therapy to go along with the medication. (which I haven't ventured into yet)
(((hugs)))
I hope you are feeling better soon.

By Vicki on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 07:49 pm:

I was on Paxil for about a year a few years ago. There was TONS of things going on in our life at the time and I just couldn't handle it! I went to the Dr to talk about a mild nerve pill and left with Paxil. I would have never described the way I felt as depressed. More anxious than anything. I wasn't sleeping at night, my mind raced in 1,000 directions etc. When he started asking me a few questions, I started bawling and everything that was going on in my life came spilling out. LOL It is a wonder that he didn't have me committed that day. LOL I was VERY leary about taking them, but I must say that I was a totally different person and felt great!! They just took the edge off if that makes sense. I thought that I could handle going off of them after about 7 months, but I couldn't. I went back on and tried AFTER we finshed building our home and got all moved and settled. It was then that I realized that our life was back in order and I stopped taking them and it was fine. Don't get stuck on the word depression.... I would have never used that word to describe how I was feeling! Good Luck and make an appointment to at least talk to your dr!!

By Truestori on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 08:01 pm:

Eve,

You have been through soooo much lately. I would definitly talk with your doctor, and see what he suggests. If you are uncomfortable with him maybe see someone else, if possible. Sometimes it is easier to relate to a woman. I know the feeling about your mom, I am in the same boat. Sending many ehugs in your direction. Take care of yourself.

By Tink on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 08:12 pm:

Eve, I never felt depressed, as in wanting to commit suicide or terribly sad, but I felt completely overwhelmed with all I had to do in life. I went on an antidepressant after talking to my pastor and my doctor and it helped me cope with decisions and managing daily life. After 6 months, I was weaned off of them and did fine until the post-partum hormones hit again. I have taken them for about 6 months after each pregnancy and have been on them again for about 6 months now. I am feeling calmer again and have an appointment to talk to the Dr. about getting off of them again. My big question for myself to find out if I need to take them was "If I was feeling like myself, would I be able to cope with this?" If the answer is yes, I know that I need to talk to the Dr. If I know that whatever is going on would be difficult no matter what, I try to find other ways to deal with my anxiety and emotions. HTH {{{Eve}}}

By Happynerdmom on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 08:30 pm:

(((((Eve)))))I don't have any better advice to add to the above posts...just wanted to give you some hugs.

By Jilly on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 08:41 pm:

I'm always here for you, Evie. Our lives have often mirrored each others and it continues. That's not to say I know exactly how you're feeling, but you're not alone. Call me this weekend - or anything - if you want to talk.

I love you!

By Anonymous on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 08:57 pm:

I started taking anti-depressants quite a few years back and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I had post partum and had to get some help. After I started to recover, I realized that I felt better than I have felt in my entire adult life.

I don't worry about that fact that I may have to take a pill for the rest of my life. If I do, so be it. I am calm, level headed and happy.

My depression came out in the form of anxiety and outbursts of anger. Everyone's symptoms are different. I didn't want to sleep all the time, I just felt like I hated people, everyone was an idiot in my book, and my kids wrecked my nerves. The meds started working quickly. Best thing I ever did!

I used to take Zoloft and it was great except for the sexual side effects. I now take Lexapro and it has no side effects that I have noticed.

Don' be concerned about being labeled for taking medications. I think that more women than not are on medication. God made men smart enough to invent meds, so I think they are a blessing from God .

By Mommyathome on Friday, September 24, 2004 - 10:06 pm:

I forgot to mention, the medication I take is called Effexor XR I have noticed no side effects!

By Feona on Saturday, September 25, 2004 - 07:15 am:

I would try the counseling too before the medication.

I was going to go to be hypnotised(for what I can't remember) and the doctors just offered my anti depressant effexor. I guess I wanted to experiment and see if I would be permanently happy on medication so I took it.

I don't think I was depressed at the time. Maybe alittle. No ones life is perfect.


I tried the Effexor and I had a werid side effect. (Too embarressing to mention.) I also felt like really really werid. Like my head was in the air or something. I felt extremely happy but sick to my stomach and not myself. I told the doctor and he said just to take the medicine and I would get use to it or something.. But it made me feel really strange. So I took it for like 2 days...

I had two miscarriages. Depressing. But there is all sort of stuff the doctors can do with medication now. They give you medication injectibles where you make like 3 or more eggs a month so your chances of having a baby are greater.

Also you should ask the doctor if you need progresterone suppositories next time. To help develop the womb. I took them no side effects.


Also what helped me, was all I had was a egg sack - no heart beat. So I convinced myself that there was no baby just a egg sack. Sorry if that doesn't help.

Also try to take a walk everyday. It helps!

I don't know if this would help but I also think how many woman can't have any babies at all. So I am luckier than some and unluckier than some.

I heard of a woman doing injectibles and had 14 misscarriages.


I don't think anything is wrong with the medicine if you want to try it.

By Eve on Saturday, September 25, 2004 - 08:59 am:

Thank you, everyone. You have given me lots to think about. I'm not someone who ever leans towards taking medication. I usually even skip the Tylenol if I don't need it. So, I'll be sure to give it lots of thought. I think therapy is something everyone should go through in their lives. I think it's wonderful. So, I may use that tool no matter what.

Also, depression does seem to run in my family. I just feel like I'm in a fog that won't lift. I'm not crying or having trouble getting out of bed. I just get overwhelmed easily lately, and I feel like I'm at a loss on how to deal with it. I've carried so much on my shoulders for so many people. I'm just tired. I'm not sure if that makes sense at all!

Jill,thanks. I know you know more about my life than probably most everyone else I know. It's nice to have a friend who I can be real with.

Thank you all for letting me vent and think "out loud." I appreciate all of you sharing your stories and experience. They have helped so much!

By Bea on Saturday, September 25, 2004 - 02:05 pm:

Eve, I don't think that medication is a cure, in any sense of the word, but I do think that it's a great crutch. It gives you the level playing field you need to do the work. If you are too depressed and haven't the strength and emotional energy to work on your therapy, you'll be wasting your time and money going. I think that, once you learn better coping skills, you'll be better equipped to stand alone. The medication can help you to get there.

By Vicki on Saturday, September 25, 2004 - 02:34 pm:

I agree Bea. I also think that it isn't a bad idea to get a little medication in you so that you can clear your head before you start counseling. Get the medicine to clear your head, start counseling to teach you skills and then go off the medication and put those skills to work.

By Ginny~moderator on Saturday, September 25, 2004 - 08:48 pm:

Eve, fog is exactly the right description. I think of depression as a gray fog that blankets and covers me and everything around me, and when I come out of it, the sun has come out and dispersed the fog.

In the old cartoon strip, L'il Abner, there is a character called Joe Btfsplk, who went through life with a cloud over his head, and that is what I think of sometimes when I think of depression.

By Bea on Saturday, September 25, 2004 - 11:59 pm:

Funny Ginny. That's the nickname I gave myself many years ago.

By Imamommyx4 on Sunday, September 26, 2004 - 12:36 am:

Antidepressants can help and do help a lot of people. They may or may not be what you need. And there are several different types and strengths. If one doesn't seem to help, another might just do the trick. You and your doc need to talk.

When I get down in the dumps and feel overwhelmed and out of control, I find that much of my problem is that I keep worrying over the same things and can't seem to put any order to anything. One thing that helps me is to sit down and write down all of my concerns so that I can get them off my mind on to paper (or the computer). And another thing that does is organize my worries so that I can kind of prioritize them. And when I get smart, I take that piece of paper with all of my worries, fold it up. pray over it, and give it to God. His back is much stronger than mine. The problems don't necessarily all go away, but my brain feels better.

I'll say a prayer for you. I know it's a tough time for you.

By Lauram on Sunday, September 26, 2004 - 03:06 pm:

I've had problems with chronic stress and it was suggested that I try antidepressants, but I haven't yet. I also had some post partum depression. That was pretty scary. Both times, I've been able to "get myself out of it" with lots of rest and "me" time. I think mine was sheer exhaustion more than true depression- which is why I think that worked better for me. Also, I WAS overwhelmed. My life was spinning out of control. For me, it was based on that- not something biochemical. I believe that makes a huge difference too.

By Jilly on Sunday, September 26, 2004 - 07:06 pm:

Eve said: "I've carried so much on my shoulders for so many people."

I'll say an Amen to that! You definitely have carried your share of others' stuff! Why do you think we're not in a BIG rush to move back to New England? Or move to FL? ;) I know that my family would be all over us!