My husband has not received any orders yet, but was told at his last drill to expect to be deployed around the end of April 2005 to Iraq. What do I need to do to get things in order here at home? He is not sure of the length of time he would be gone, this will be our first deployment. His unit is looking for someone to head a support group here at home. I would love to do that, but what do I need to know before I get involved with doing this? Any advice? Of course this is not set in stone (nothing is with the Army until you actually see the stone!) Any advice will help Thanks

By Bea on Monday, August 16, 2004 - 04:31 pm:

I think the support group will be a fantastic idea. I'm assuming your husband's detachment is a Reserve Unit. In Regular Army Units there is a Chain of Concern which is headed by the senior spouses to help the less experienced spouses deal with deployment issues. I'm not sure how this works with the Reserves. The group will be helpful for both you and all the spouses who participate. You can share resource information and fellowship. With all the rumors floating around and the fears you all must share, you might want to see if there's a need right now for such a group. That way it will be in place to help you prepare for any deployment. I pray by April you'll no longer have to worry.

By Ginny~moderator on Monday, August 16, 2004 - 05:53 pm:

How about co-chairing? Find another person you are comfortable working with, and the two of you tap a committee of another 4-8 women. Then consult with a Regular Army unit to find out how the support group is supposed to work, what its tasks and goals are, and what resources are available. I am sure that the reserve staff can put you in touch with appropriate people.

My motto is, don't recreate the wheel - so do find out what other people are already doing because they know what works, what doesn't, what resources you can tap, and the pitfalls along the way.

By Palmbchprincess on Monday, August 16, 2004 - 06:26 pm:

Things to have in order for the deployment... a will, a power of attorney, both general, and any special that you may need. Make sure you are able to speak with any companies he has accounts with. If you are not on the account, he needs to call them and give them an OK to Speak With. As far as a support group, Bea is absolutely right, the spouses can share information, keep each other company, and assist other spouses who are in need (IE, women due to deliver their babies while the soldier is away.) If you head the chain of concern, be sure to verify information whenever possible, you will often need to squash rumors. Know the rear detachment officers, and pass along any updates you get from them. In my ex-husband's unit we had a call tree. You'll need to have good contact info for the spouses, especially if they are going to stay with relatives or the such. When the commander's wife had news to pass, she would call her contacts, who each had a list of spouses to call. I was a contact for a while, and it can be difficult responsibility. There were some casualties, and I had to be the bearer of bad news during those times. Really, just having a good communication plan is the best thing. Making sure all the spouses know they have someone to call if they need it. Good luck, and I hope your DH doesn't get orders, please keep us updated!

By Ladypeacek on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 02:15 am:

To be honest my advice if this is your very first deployment is not to be head of that committee. Maybe participate in it but running it without having gone through this might prove to be very stressful for you. The first time my dh was sent tdy to the desert i was a wreck, with the kids and the new added responsibilities at home, worrying about him...i was no one to support others. It sounds good cuz you think it will keep you busy and make time go by fast but it is alot of work and very stressful to do, i think you should let a veteran wife head it and maybe just offer your help as needed when you know you can do it.

By Cat on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 08:04 pm:

Like Crystal said, make sure you have a POA and that you know how to do all your families finances (if you don't already). I'd suggest that if your name isn't on any accounts you go ahead and have your dh put your name on those accounts instead of just having him tell the place it's okay for you to take care of business. Also, like Crystal, updated wills. You are looking at a long ways off, but it is good to plan ahead. My dh has only deployed once (for 6 months back in December '99--left 2 or 3 days after Christmas). He's still on a medical profile so he can't deploy (although at times I wish he would! lol). I also agree with the thoughts above of you not being totally in charge of a support group, but helping would probably be okay. Good luck. We're always here if you need us.