I am hosting a party (Girls Night Out) at someone elses house. That person doesn't like someone that I really want to invite. She has asked me not to invite her. The person that I want to invite knows I am having a party, just not when. I can't have it at my house, there is not enough room. They are both relatives, what do I do?

By Bea on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 01:27 am:

Sorry, but I think a person has the right to say who will come into her home. Is it possible to use another friend's house where this friend would be welcome?

By Anonymous on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 01:45 am:

I know, I just don't know what to say to the other person! I don't want to hurrt her feelings, I know she will find out. There is no other place to have it!

By Vicki on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 08:42 am:

Does the person that you want to invite know where you are having it? It sounds to me like there is bad blood between the two of them and I would have to think that she would understand why she wouldn't be included. I agree that the person who is having the event in her home does have some say as to who is at it.

By Mcrosby57 on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 11:20 am:

Geeeze!!!! All I can say is: "Women!!"

Why is it that men never have this problem? I hate it when our sex gets so petty. This is nothing more than a grown up version of what some of my third graders do. It is so sad that we spend so much time on issues like this.

Hope you find a solution.

By Marcia on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 01:38 pm:

I think I'd choose to do the girl's night out at a restaurant, where you can have who you want.

By Kate on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 01:40 pm:

Ditto Marcia, perfect solution even though it'll be pricier. It's worth it, IMO.

By Ginny~moderator on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 02:25 pm:

Men certainly do have problems with pettiness - they, however, often solve them with a punch.

Seems to me that the person who has agreed to host this event is being very petty - but, it is her home. How do the other women in the group feel about the person who would be excluded?

This is all a bit confusing to me. Is this a regular event for this group of women, where people take turns hosting? Or a first time event? I don't quite understand how you can host it in someone else's house.

By Anonymous on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 06:16 pm:

It is a party that you sell things at. I went to one & decided it was fun. So I made the choice to do it. At that time there wasn't as much drama going on. Even though the two didn't get along, I thought they would be able to be in the same room for a while. They have done it for birthday parties. I guess my biggest concern is am I honest with the person that can't come. Or do I try to hide the fact that I am having it. Right now I feel like canceling it, except I made a promise.

By Texannie on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 06:22 pm:

Shoot, if I was the friend that couldn't come, I would be thrilled. I hate those selling parties!
I wouldn't try to hide it. If they are both aware of the problem, then if shouldn't be a big surprise.

By Tink on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 06:27 pm:

I disagree with the women who have already posted. I think if your friend agreed to have a party in her home, knowing that you are probably going to invite this woman, she should allow you to invite her. In my experience, it's fairly easy to avoid someone except for a simple," Hi, how are you?" More than likely, she will have plenty of other people to talk to and she can sit across the room and live with it for a few hours. If that isn't an option, I would say "Since you and Mary don't get along, I'm afraid it won't work to have you at the party on Friday. I would love to meet you for lunch next Wednesday and we can look over the catalog and I can tell you all the gossip." Something like that. Then, it takes the problem and puts it in their laps. You are having a party but they can't get along so they will have to make accomodations.

By Melanie on Sunday, May 2, 2004 - 06:54 pm:

I agree with those who say to be honest with the one who is not welcome in the home. It should not be surprising to her, and it shouldn't be something that is held against you. It's the woman's home-she has every right to not want someone there. If you want to invite both, I think you need to find a new location.

Good luck. What a tough situation you are in!!

By Conni on Monday, May 3, 2004 - 11:11 am:

Well, we certainly dont know the details as to why they dont get along. I have been to bday parties before where ex wife/new wife were there. I found that *I* felt very uncomfortable and I wasnt even in the family! LOL I can personally think of 2 people that I would avoid inviting to my own home if at all possible because they drive me crazy!!!! ;) I think if you are the hostess, but are using someone elses home for the party---then you need to respect her wishes. I mean come on it is just a 'selling party'. Its not like its a baby shower/wedding shower/grandma and grandpa's 50th anniv. I am gonna bet the girl that isnt welcome isnt going to care if she misses this party.

Also, I would like to add that alot of times the sales consultant's will offer an alternative suggestion as to where you can have these parties. I have been to parties at my church activity ctr, salvation army building, the sales rep's house, etc... We also have done just catalog parties. Everyone gets a catalog takes it home and orders something (no need for big party at someones home). I have also been to parties in the smallest of homes and found them to be quite cozy and alot of fun!

Just my two cents..

By Babysitbarb on Tuesday, May 4, 2004 - 03:49 pm:

I have to say I agree with Conni on this one.