Well my appointment today didn't go well, I got dealt a double blow one portion I wasn't expecting at all.

My latest pap came back with high grade cancerous lesions, I go in on 12/7 for another colposcopy unless they can get me in next week. The next step depending on the results of the colposcopy will be a cone biopsy (I haven't researched this totally yet but get the general idea of what this is looking for and entails) then depending on the cone biopsy says I could be looking at a hysterectomy. Then depending on the hyst will be looking at if further treatment might be needed.

Then we had to talk about my other issue, I've had a pretty big drop in my other #'s and he's wanting to put me on medication. I bargained for another six weeks to see what the #'s do but if I don't have a INCREASE I'm going to have to start medication. I honestly think I'm more upset about this than the other because I can DO something to fight it but with this I feel like it's the "beginning of the end", I know it's not necessarily true but it's how I feel about it.

I've spent the good part of the day crying, Brendan's at my mom's house then tomorrow he goes to his dad's until Sunday. I'll get to spend a couple hours with him before he leaves tomorrow. I just really don't understand why all this has to happen at the same time to me, why I can't EVER get a break.

By Yjja123 on Tuesday, November 20, 2007 - 10:40 pm:

I am so sorry!!!
((((((hugs))))))
You are in my thoughts and prayers.

By Crystal915 on Tuesday, November 20, 2007 - 11:02 pm:

((((Christy)))) You are in my thoughts, I'm so sorry you are going through this. Hang in there, honey!!!

By Debbie on Tuesday, November 20, 2007 - 11:19 pm:

{{{hugs}}} I am so sorry this is happening to you.

By Nicki on Tuesday, November 20, 2007 - 11:41 pm:

Christy, I'm so sorry. I'm keeping you in my prayers. We're here for you whenever you need to talk.
((Hugs))

By Christylee on Tuesday, November 20, 2007 - 11:58 pm:

Thank you everyone for your ((hugs)) and prayers.

By Mlee on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 02:18 am:

I hope you have family or friends around over the next few days while Brendan is away. Nurture yourself. (((Hugs))) to you.

By Conni on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 08:20 am:

(((HUGS))) I hope you can get some rest and even enjoy yourself a little this holiday.

So sorry you are going through all of this. The good news is that you are seeing a doc and working on it all!!! Good for you!

By Jackie on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 08:22 am:

I am sorry you are going through this. Many prayers being sent your way.

By Vicki on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 08:35 am:

Hugs and prayers for you.

By Mom2three1968 on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 09:22 am:

(((Huge Hugs))) for you, and prayers too! I'll be thinking of you.

By Bobbie~moderatr on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 09:22 am:

More hugs and prayers for you. We are here.

By Melanie on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 09:30 am:

(((HUGS))) and prayers. I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. We have huge shoulders and are here for you any time. (((HUG)))

By Tink on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 09:55 am:

I can't tell you how sorry I am that you are going through all of this and all at once. You'll be in my prayers, Christy. Please remember we're here for you at any time.

By Dana on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 12:47 pm:

I am so sorry to read about what is going on. I'm rarely at this board any more and have a tough time keeping up. It sounds just heart breaking. I am sending my prayers for you!

By Christylee on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 09:44 pm:

Thank you everyone, I'm at work tonight. Tomorrow I plan on going to my dad's house and then I work the rest of the weeekend.

By Nicki on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 - 10:25 pm:

I hope you'll have a nice Thanksgiving, Christy. I've thought of you several times today and wondered what you would be doing tomorrow. Glad to hear you'll be going to your dad's.

By Karen~admin on Thursday, November 22, 2007 - 08:03 am:

{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} Christy. I'm sorry to hear this, and I imagine it's really hard to process. But - you have options, so as hard as it is right now, try to see the glass as half full - a positive outlook will help you fight these things! You have all of us to vent to, come to for support. You are in my prayers, and I'm sending all the positive thoughts/vibes I can muster up your way!

By Pamt on Thursday, November 22, 2007 - 10:00 am:

((((Christy))))