Kids Saying "That's So Gay"
Moms View Message Board: The Kitchen Table (Debating Board): Kids Saying "That's So Gay"
What do you guys think about kids saying "That's so gay"? More and more kids these days are saying this phrase. According the Think Before You Speak website, "That's so gay" has been used more than 1,000 times on Twitter. Have you guys spoken with your kids about this and what it really means? Also, in case you're interested, here's the website: http://www.thinkb4youspeak.com
It's unfortunate that the phrase is being used in a negative manner. No, we haven't spoken to our children about the phrase or the word. I personally feel they are too young (4 and 6) and they do not attend public school. Our family, nuclear and extended, does not use the phrase. It wasn't so long ago when the word "gay" used to mean something completely different.
Kids do co-opt whatever adults intend and give it a twist. They pick up on the pop culture use of stereotyped gay culture where that phrase is used among gay characters to each other on sitcoms on every channel. There isn't a clear message that this is inappropriate and further I'm not sure they perceive it as negative usage. One of the comments made by a colleague who works with young teens is that trading gender is a weekly occurrence and that they don't see that they have to choose but more often wear a set of behaviors that they believe fit their current gender/sexual preference. Its very fluid and so is the languaging of it - nothing sacrosanct or inviolable.
You both have great points! Enchens, I agree - it's SO unfortunate on how the word has changed in such a negative way! Northcountrymom, I think you're on to something - we need to create that clear message to kids. Do you think it's more effective to talk to kids about not using the phrase/behaving this way or by our actions and not using "that's so gay"? I think it's great to get kids involved in Gay-Straight Alliances at an early age (maybe not at 4 or 6, but once they understand a little more of what's going on). Also, I think it's great to try to use other words to get your meaning across. I like to use almost funny words - like lame, cray cray, and loco - in my experience, I find that kids respond really well to using words like this (depending on the ages of course).
Great Topic Girls! And you can call me old fashion and my girls roll their eyes at me ALL the time - but to tell you the truth - there are LOTS of words my girls aren't allowed to say - at least in my presence! Some of which include- Stupid, Gay, Shut Up & God. One of my daughters got off the school bus one day and said she over heard one of the kids say the "S" word on the bus and I though "oh boy - here we go..let the swearing begin" and much to my surprise - when I got it out of her (cuz of course she didn't want to SAY the word) She actually meant STUPID!! LOL I under estimated my own teaching! But as a Police officer - Of course I say my share of swear words and try my hardest not to let any slip at home - but I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. I just always try to tell my daughters that there are bigger and better words that they can chose to say that will make their vocabulary sound so much more intellectual than a crass & ignorant swear word will. & so far it's worked. I'm not completely sure what they do out of my presence - but I always use that saying "If your Mother wouldn't approve of it - then don't do it" slogan for when I'm not around! I have a full arsenal!
I want a girl! But I don't want any more work to do. I think my husband is overworked too. I tell myself that cursing for me is not using my imagination. You can make up fun words or express your feelings constructively hopefully. Anger is sadness and fear but no one ever remembers that especially me.
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