Not sure if anyone can help me, but

Our dd is well endowed (kwim).

She is only 13, just slightly overweight (maybe 10 pounds - just pointing this out so no one states, 'if she'd lose weight' some of this would be lost too.

She is tall 5'8".

She gets this from my grandmother's side, skipped a few generations, lol. My grandmother told me she developed at a very young age, etc.

Dd is in a 'D' cup. I myself can purchase bras from any store and be satisfied.

Yes, she is shy and embarrassed. No, she is not the flaunting type, thank goodness.

But there is support problems and what type of bra she should be wearing.

Anyone have any suggestions?

Of course, I went anon, just privacy issues.

TIA

By Cocoabutter on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:12 pm:

I had a friend in high school who had huge boobs, also in a D cup, and she ended up with severe back problems. I saw her at our 10 year class reunion, and she'd had reduction surgery right after we graduated. Not only does she look and feel better, but she avoided a lifetime of back pain. Just a thought if this becomes an issue. Her bone structure hasn't finished growing, and 13 is still so young for her bone structure to be supporting all the weight of large breasts.

By Yjja123 on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:16 pm:

I have been there done that. I am only 5 feet tall so it was even more difficult. I was a DD cup by 13 and kept going. I had a reduction years ago and now am "only" a D. I love Qvc's breezies bras that look great and are supportive. You are right in wanting to make sure she gets the right bra NOW. I had indentations on my shoulders from wearing the wrong kind. There are many brands out there that will provide great support. It will really mean a shopping trip and trying on various styles. Tell your daughter to hold her head high--many girls will actually be jealous of her.

By Marg on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:17 pm:

omg, she walked by and I forgot to hit the anon button, i'm so sorry.

I'm worried about dd also, she does have back pain during pms.

The doctor told her to lose 10 pounds and that might help. I kind of got angry at that because she doesn't look overweight, he stated about the weight chart.

I know dh had an uncle was 6'4". She is already past me at 5'8" at 13.

By Crystal915 on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:18 pm:

I was a full C by the time I was 12, and it's really hard, especially if the other girls pick on her. I remember coming home in tears because other girls said I stuffed my bra, etc. I would take her to have her measured for a bra, to make sure she's in the right size. If she'd like to minimize her breasts, I know VS has some good minimizing bras, might be worth looking into.

By Marg on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:19 pm:

She is that way Yvonne with the indentations.

I'm embarrassed to say this, I never tried on a bra. Are you allowed to try on bras? I really need to know this info.

I will look at qvc's.

thank you

By Marg on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:24 pm:

We homeschool. But she has a lot of friends and they are not mean. But Crystal, boys and men ogle her as if she were 18 She looks older, but doesn't dress provacatively(sp?). She hates makeup. She is a natural beauty.

She doesn't like it and often it embarrasses her. I tell her don't be embarrassed you area very beautiful young woman

By Eve on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:31 pm:

I would take her somewhere to be fitted properly and I'm sure they would give good advice as to what kind of support she would need. HTH

By Crystal915 on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 04:57 pm:

Marg, I went through the same thing... men and older boys would hit on me, not realizing how young I was. It's not fun, and I can completely sympathize with her, soon everyone will kind of catch up but being an early bloomer is as miserable as being a late bloomer. And YES!! You should ALWAYS try on a bra before buying it. I would be very weary of buying a bra through a catalogue or online without having it fitted in the store first, because each one is so different. For example, I used to wear whatever kind/brand of bras I wanted in HS and before I had kids, but now will only wear VS Very Sexy padded push-up. I've tried the other VS lines, but none are as comfortable for me, since nursing the kids. Then there is the difference between the balconette and plunge, the underwires are shaped differently. Not to mention, the doc is right, if I gain or lose 10-15lbs I can change 1-3 cup sizes, I own bras in every size now, from A to D, just from 25lbs fluxuation in weight over the past 18 months.

By Reds9298 on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 05:01 pm:

I went through the same thing, too, at between 10-12. Fortunately I evened out and now have small boobs (somehow they just keep getting smaller) but I also lost tons of weight at the end of high school.

I agree to have her fitted for a good bra that supports her. Good luck!

By Yjja123 on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 05:04 pm:

Absolutely--you CAN try on bras. Just finding a good fitting one might make her feel better. I know it is difficult and the unwanted attention from older men is disturbing. Try to keep her thinking positive about it. My daughter is following in my footsteps and is a B cup already---at 11. I have told her there is no shame in it and we go bra shopping a lot. She has starting walking straight--instead of hunching over--so I think I am getting through to her that she is beautiful. This can hurt her self esteem so try to be as positive as possible.
Good luck!

By Sunny on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 05:31 pm:

I would aslo suggest taking her in for a proper fitting. Before you go, you could probably get a good idea of her actual size if you measure her yourself. Here is one site, though I'm sure there is more.

Bra sizes due fluctuate with weight, but the doctor telling her to lose 10lbs sounds to me like he thinks that's a cure-all and it's not. Even if she lost weight, there's no guarantee that her bra size would change that much.

Did anyone see the Oprah show a while back where she talked about the importance of a properly fitting bra? I knew I had been wearing the wrong size and when I finally "found" my size and bra, and the difference was amazing. I am now comfortable! LOL I was also amazed at how many pretty bras there are nowadays for us "full-figured" women. I'm sure she could find something that not only supports her but makes her feel good about herself.

By Sandysmom on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 05:51 pm:

JMHO, at her height & weight only being 10lbs over, I think the Dr. should have never said anything about that. She is already modest, and now she may become self concious about her weight too. I, too have heard that QVC bra's are good.

By Ginny~moderator on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 06:55 pm:

Definitely, go to a good department store and try on bras. I have seen bras with wider straps, and even with straps that widen out over the shoulders, to spread the support and make less of an indentation. Once she finds a bra that gives good support and is comfortable, then you can see about buying them from a catalog or on line.

My dear mother was a 36-38 D and DD most of her adult life, and it was a great trial to her. And even more of a trial to her when she got older and, as happens to all of us, the breast "muscle" tissue turns to fat and she sagged terribly. I remember when she was in the hospital she insisted on wearing a bra under her nightgown during the day, for comfort.

By Boxzgrl on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 08:09 pm:

I'm 5'8" and a D cup when not pregnant, though i'm average weight. Victoria's Secret bras seem to hold me the best with a lot less bounce, if you kwim. Nothing else has helped. Other bras make me feel heavy in the chest area.

By Mrsheidi on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 08:29 pm:

Marg, I once had a ninth grader say "Nice Boobs!" in front of the whole football team when I was in junior high as a 7th grader. It was horrible. And, another guy, who stared at them like a moth to a flame, who said "Whoah, are those real?" And, I've even knocked over a whole rack of clothes because "they" bumped into it.
Aaaaahhh...tell her she's not alone. Being able to just move your arms freely, run without being stared at, or just to feel comfortable!

I grew just like that at her age, very quickly. I was very athletic, so it was bothersome.

I tell you what is the best...Bali Minimizer bras. Victoria Secret bras aren't supportive enough. The material fades quickly.
These will hold her UP and IN.
Click Here

By Marg on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 08:55 pm:

Oh I like that one Mrsheidi.

I've notice, she does not like to run, because of this problem

She loves sports but this has been a problem with bouncing, heaviness, etc.

Thank all of you ladies

dd and I can talk about anything but I know it would be very hard for her to get measured by someone else

We'll see how it turns out!

ALSO, ideas for swimsuites!!! Help.

She loves to swim, but she hates bathing suits I don't even want to start with this topic. Most make her look top heavy. Any suggestions here would also help.

By Truestori on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 09:03 pm:

Well, I resorted to a Cuddle duds Hidden Assets tank top for my tankini top. I couldn't find any swimsuit tops that fit and underwire is nearly impossible to find. I can wear these like tank tops or to the beach. I can vouch for minimizers and at her age she would feel alot better making them appear smaller. HTH's
P.s I must have done something wrong with the size calcualtor because it came up as 42AA, and then it said according to their calculations I don't need a bra...Too funny LOL

By Tink on Tuesday, March 28, 2006 - 09:04 pm:

I've heard all the terrible things boys will say to girls too. The one that sticks in my memory is when one of the boys in my PE class asked if I could be excused from running the mile because my "jiggling" was distracting and he was worried I'd give myself a black eye. Also athletic and very thin at the time.

I don't find VS bras to be that supportive over a long period of time. They fit well when first worn but throughout the day, I find them less supportive and more uncomfortable. I have two of the exact bra Heidi linked to and, now that I'm bigger everywhere else, I really like two different styles in the cacique line. You can find them here. They start at a size 36D and are the most comfortable and supportive bras I've worn and many of the styles are quite cute with polka dots, bows and the no-line bras. They even carry minimizing bras which might appeal to your dd.

Good luck. I know how hard this can be.