Very Tragic Christmas Story....
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Very Tragic Christmas Story....
We had a very sad thing happen in our state just before Christmas. A local man, who is an automobile mechanic, decided that he did not have enough money to give his kids a Christmas. So, he held up a bank and got $2,000.00. He used it to buy a tree and gifts for his kids.
Now he is facing Federal charges, and will go to a Federal prison for quite a few years, causing his family to be without him.
I can never condone stealing, but I can almost understand his despair. I don't know how old his children are, but I'm sure if he had gone to one of the social service agencies, they would have helped him. Besides, what does that teach his children about the REAL reason for Christmas?
It is so sad. There are individuals and businesses that could have written him a check for two thousand dollars without batting an eye.
Well I do not condone stealing whatsoever and it was really stupid to do that all for material things. Social agencies don't always help. Some people fall into the categorie of making enough to not qualify for different programs, but not making enough to get by. He could have done like a lot of other people and put it on credit card.
The only thing tragic about it is he was stupid enough to rob a bank and now facing the consequences and so is his family. He obviously did not think this one through. There are worst things in life than not buying toys at Christmas time. There were other options available. One of them not buying a tree and christmas presents. Which is sad, but not the worst thing in life. He could have bit the bullet this year and did things different the next to ensure that the same thing didn't happen next Christmas. I feel sorry for the family, but not the guy who robbed the bank. The children are the victims here, not him. Taking someone else's money is never right.
I think that debate-wise, Juli4 and I don't necessarily always see thing the same way, but in this case, I agree with her 100%.
I can understand his desperation, but what he did was wrong. Period. If he had been stealing to put food in his family's mouths or have heat to keep them warm (also wrong, but more *understandable*), it *might* be a bit different.
But as tragic as his situation is, he was wrong, he committed a crime, and sadly, there should be consequences.
I totally agree about this being wrong. I never condone stealing. I say that, but of course I've never been put in the situation to have to steal for my family. Take New Orleans after the Hurricane. Many of those who stole only necessaries probably never thought they would ever steal.
As far as it goes with not understanding why he felt he had to buy his children things.
Have you ever been put in a position where your child wants something so badly but you just can't afford to get it? You would if you had the money? Not a situation where you just won't. I have, and it is an awful, gutwrenching feeling. I have had a past Christmas where we weren't sure how we were going to manage a decent Christmas for our two young children. We resorted to Credit cards.
I know that the true reason for Christmas is not the material things, but even though we are a very Christian family, involved in church, and my children can tell you all about the Christmas and Easter stories, we still believe in Santa, and my kids would be disappointed if they didn't get some things they wanted.
So yes, I can see the desperation. He was probably panicking, but he still should have seeked help somewhere else. Though, it is very difficult to get any help when you actually try to work and make a living and just can't seem to get far enough ahead. No one wants to help anyone like that. It's the ones who don't bring in any income that get the most help. If there is a mother and a father and kids, and an income, then you can pretty much kiss any assistance good-bye. This country is screwed up like that, but that is a whole different topic! LOL!
Though, I can completely understand his desperation to not disappoint his children, he should have never robbed a bank. People say he didn't have to get presents or a tree. Come on. I know that there is no way we could ever do that to children. How do you explain that Santa just decided to skip your house this year???
I agree, it is a very sad, tragic story. No one in this country should ever be in a situation like this. It is unfortunate that in a country so rich, that can send millions and millions of dollars to other countries, that we have families who don't have enough, who go hungry, don't have electricity, don't have medical insurance, and don't have a decent roof over their heads. But yes, I realize that a lot of people make bad decisions in life, too.
I so agree with you Adena!
What he did was 100% wrong & it certainly wasn't teaching his children very well. But it is so hard to go to work everyday & barely afford to put a nice meal together for the holidays let alone buy your children a small gift.
Last year we had such a hard time that we enrolled our children in the local Secret Santa program & some wonderful person helped us. This year our situation changed & we were the ones that were able to help someone.
I can understand his desperation, unfortunately he caved in on a weak moment & will be paying for it as well as his family.
Luckily a real tragedy was avoided as no one was hurt ( I hope) or killed.
I hope he and his family get the help they need.
Ame
I hate to say it, but if I were that desperate (felt a need to steal) there are certainly ways to do it without robbing a bank, and getting federal charges. Perhaps he was hoping for a "suicide by cop" situation? It just seems so bizarre, one doesn't usually wake up and decide to start robbing banks.
Have you ever been put in a position where your child wants something so badly but you just can't afford to get it?
Yes I have, and it was often. My kids wanted EVERYTHING they saw on TV and in the papers. We didn't have much extra money. I'm not saying we faced poverty, but I didn't believe then, nor do I now, that kids should have every desire filled. My boys rarely wore the latest fashions, nor the most expensive shoes. They were sometimes ridiculed for not being the coolest kids around. I gave them a hug and said, "Get over it." Life is rarely fair, much less generous, and even kids need to get used to that fact. This guy needed a reality check, and I think he'll get one in prison. Regrettably his kids will be worse off now. He was an idiot.
I agree with Bea.
Last year was our worst year. Dh was off 3 months due to an injury and due to years of circumstances it was just a bad year.
Men do not want to ask for help.
I have taught our daughters it is better to have family than to have material things (that is due to the fact that most of our immediate relatives have passed away). Yes, I have taught this. Dh was raised in a home where there was a lot of materialism and material items were given instead of a loving home
That was an unforgettable Christmas. And it even taught dh that materialistic things are not needed to celebrate the real joy and meaning of Christmas.
I do pray for this family.
All kids want things they see on television. That is not what I am talking about. At all. My son wanted the T-Rex mountain so badly. He never wants anything so much. It cost about 27.00 and was the one thing he asked Santa for. He's six. When asked what he wanted for Christmas, he named ONE thing.
My children have always had to wear clothes and shoes bought at Wal-mart, and they've never asked for more. My dd(9) sees jeans at other places for over 20 bucks and can't believe how much they are! If they are lucky they get clothes from Sears. DS gets the cheap jeans from there simply because he is so slim that he has to wear a slim, and they don't have pants to fit him at Wal-mart.
I can walk in any store with my kids and buy presents for other kids' birthdays, or for our Angels at Christmas and they won't ask for one thing.
But at Christmas I would have been heart broken if I couldn't have gotten it for him. Probably would have been more upset than my son. I don't think any mother who truly is a mother can say she has never been upset about not being able to afford something for her child, if she has ever been in that place. I'm talking about not being able to afford something that you would buy if you had the extra money. Not saying no to something because they don't need it even though you do have the money. Two totally different things, here.
Not just everything they see on television, but that one thing that they truly would love to have. Yes, my kids have been told plenty of times that they don't need this or that. But we are talking about Christmas. Not just a whiny child who thinks they have to have all the latest crap.
I agree that the father shouldn't have done what he did. It was irresponsible and stupid, and I am sure there is more to the story... Maybe the father had a past history of crime, maybe he didn't. I feel sorry for this family that they will have to suffer more for the father's mistake than if he had chosen to just not buy presents or a tree. Nothing excuses illegal behavior, but to be so arrogant and cold about why he did it just strikes me the wrong way. I just have too much sympathy for parents put in hard places, I guess. I would never go to that extreme, but I do have sympathy for them.
Again Adena I agree & completely understand what you are saying.
Adena, you said it very well.
Our children are the same way. They never ask for anything! They understand and know that we are on a tight budget. They do not whine in stores and are not spoiled.
I feel so bad for this family also.
However, I do think he did have a choice whether to explain to his children his situation or do what he did.
I do not know the whole story but I too believe it is truly devastating to the whole family.
At least in our area, when you go for help some places make you almost feel 'guilty' and unworthy of help. Our society needs to get used to the fact that there are people out there that actually need the help and are not just pulling a scam. America needs to really look at poverty levels.
I feel he did feel desperate. I know nothing about the court system, but I was thinking if this was his first crime would the court be less strict?
Christmas in our house was a LEAN one...We told the DSK that we didnt have alot of money this year...this was the first time we have had to do that... but we did tell them we would try to do something for them when DSH gets his BONUS!!! Our DSK understand this because we have always told them that they didnt NEED alot of toys... They have been pretty good about this..Things SHOULD NEVER get so bad that a person feels that robbing a bank is the ONLY way because we all know it is NOT! My heart goes out to him and his family...Who will watch over them now that Dad is NOT there... Lets all keep them in our prayers.
Thanks, Adena and Emily. You understand what I was trying to say. Yes,what he did was dead wrong, and showed poor judgment, FROM WHERE WE SIT! However, we are not in his skin, and don't know the story behind the story (and there always is one). Maybe he remembered a heartbreaking Christmas from his own childhood, maybe he is ill, either physically or mentally; we don't know, so we can't judge.
It IS pretty hard to explain to children that Santa liked the other kids, but that THEY must not have been good enough. And we can't assume that they wanted the latest fad toy. DH and I take tags from a "Giving Tree" in one of our local restaurants every year, right after Thanksgiving, and shop for needy children. We take about four girl tags and four boy tags. Our DS's (ages 17 and 18) help us shop, and we all love doing it. Since our boys were once "state kids", they KNOW how these little kids feel better than anyone. The tags have the child's first name, age and their requests. MANY of the children ask for, example: a warm coat, new shoes, socks, mittens, sweaters. Many don't even ask for toys. It's heartbreaking. Coats, shoes, etc. are things many kids take for granted. We all love to imagine the looks on the kids faces when they open their gifts. We always put a card in each gift, with the child's name, and write "I Love You! Santa".
That's why I say that it is too bad that the Dad didn't seek help. Many churches, companies, schools "adopt" a family. Maybe he was too proud. We don't know, but we shouldn't judge. And you are right, when some of the folks in Louisiana and Mississippi stole food and clean drinking water, who could condemn them? Who amongst us wouldn't do that to save our kids? There is a big difference between that and the people seen walking through flood waters with big screen TV's on their shoulders.
Another sad fact is that an automobile mechanic's job is a very important one. The man who fixes the brakes on your car, literally holds the lives of you and your family in his hands. If he does not do his job properly, you can lose your life. Yet, we as a society, don't pay them what they are worth. Some even look down their nose at someone who works in grease all day long. Yet where would we be without them? Without our cars, we can't get to work to provide for OUR families.
That story has bothered me ever since I heard about it. Yes, we need to pray for him and his family. I am praying that the court will have him make restitution some other way that taking him away from his family. There, but for the grace of God......
"At least in our area, when you go for help some places make you almost feel 'guilty' and unworthy of help. Our society needs to get used to the fact that there are people out there that actually need the help and are not just pulling a scam. America needs to really look at poverty levels." AMEN!! Stereo types run so rampant in our society that everyone reaching out is looked at as one body, one story, no one cares to hear the stories behind the out reached hands.. We are so rich but yet we have so many poor?? Doesn't seem right that fate/circumstance sets us up for our lives and punishments. How many people seen as wealthy commit crimes every day and yet go unpunished? Crimes could mean as simple as hiding money from their company so that they can justify paying their employees as little as possible. I worked at a store, every year they lay off people so that way when they apply for their budgets for the year to come from the cooperate office they can justify the expense. Once their budget is approved they bring you back off of lay off. Looks better at the corporate office to say I employ 5 workers at X amount of money for payroll a year, than to say I employ 10 workers for the same amount. They don't have to explain the break down, just the amount they need. They give you low hours at low pay so that they don't have to carry insurance on you. They are a multi million dollar company, nation wide.. yet they get away with playing with the lives of people that actually bring the money in for them. Because unless they go against the government no on cares. Let a CEO be treated like that and heads will roll but because these people are bordering on poor/ most uneducated, can't afford to stand up for themselves/many don't even understand what they are going through is wrong and no one cares. Oh and by the way, the lay offs happen starting in November and end at the end of December.. Just when you need the money the most and you spend those two months praying it won't be you. So those people that did get laid off, surly will have to get help from some where. Especially with the way you have to fight Unemployment and wait for the checks to start IF/when they do.
I know a man that worked as a mechanic for a major car chain. He was told they would be getting a Christmas bonus for months prior to Christmas. At the very last minute they sent down word that the money wasn't in the budget and they gave them all a turkey. He and his wife had planned to use that money to buy Christmas for their kids. The man was very depressed, very angry at his employer and very resentful at God for not being able to provide for his children like he felt the rest of the world could. He was caught up in his self and his self pity that he couldn't see any way out. His wife turned to their church against his wishes (he felt stupid that they had depended on something/someone that wasn't a sure thing) and they came through with a wonderful Christmas for them. They have since helped every year with the giving at the church, the church adopts 5 families every year from their community. But in the moment of all the stress he wasn't thinking clearly about the situation. He was ashamed, angry and basically at the end of his rope. He is a good honest man but he felt life had once again let him down and his children would suffer because of his ignorance in trusting someone else to come through for him. As a person looking in from the outside not knowing the whole situation a million assumptions could be made..
In desperation, none of know what we would do. And if this man had been dealt blow after blow in life (like many of us unfortunately do) we have no clue where his mind set could have been. He could have been thinking that he was just in taking from the people that have wronged him. Who knows, since we don't know all the facts.
Stealing is wrong... But so isn't most everything else that happens in the world, unfortunately.
Bobbie,
You are so right. I worked in CPA firm for a long time and saw way to much. I knew and saw things that disturbed and disturbs me until this day. The cheating, lying, etc.
People are starving and in poverty while others scams their way out of things.
I know all accounting firms and businesses are not this way but the percentage that are out number the ones that aren't.
Bobbie, excellent post! I agree with you. Completely.
Big corporations don't really care about the people who do the work. They only care about their bottom-line! What's a Christmas bonus? I sure as heck don't know! Gary's company doesn't do a Christmas party or a summer picnic anymore, let alone give out a Christmas bonus! (They own USA Today, so you know they aren't poor.) Don't get me started.
There is a local insurance company located in Sheboygan. They have a Christmas party AND a summer picnic, for their employees! They don't seem to be poorer for it. In fact, they added onto their building recently! (Acuity)
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