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Moms View Message Board: General Discussion Archive: Archive December 2005 : Military Wives (Need advice here)
We are just making list after list of things to do and I'm just feeling overwhelmed...
I can't give you much advice because i don't remember what we did although my husband was state side anyways i know on the tricare thing we had to change our doctor that i have had for 29 years and the boys have had since they were born because he didn't accept tricare at the time..
It's a lot different for reservists/ IRR. As far as freezing sperm, I don't know anyone who has done that before going, but if you feel it is something you have to do it can't hurt. There may be a 2-3 week delay in pay, because they need all of the direct deposit info to be sent to DFAS in Indiana. Family separation pay will begin 30 days after he's gone, but is retroactive. He won't receive combat pay or anything like that until he sets foot in a combat zone. So, you are looking at base pay, BAS, and BAH right now. As for the Tricare, if your Ped is not a tricare provider you will have to change. You'll have to check Tricare's website for a list of local providers. Make sure his SGLI is updated. Call your credit card companies and loan companies, and ask them to reduce your APRs, if they are over 6%. Your situation falls under the Civil Service Act, so you have a lot of helpful "protections" at your disposal. If there are financial difficulties while he is gone, due to pay cut, or delays, you will be protected. Make sure you have copies of his orders!!! Let me say that again. HAVE LOTS OF COPIES!! Everyone and their brother will want one. Make sure he has an updated will, and you have the right type of POA. Good luck, sweetie... we're here for you.
Working in healthcare, I can only help with the TriCare question. I wish it were a simple answer to get your pediatrician to participate with TriCare. Unfortunately, it's not. It's all about contracting and reimbursement.
I'd also get a Special POA on top of a regular one. Banks generally do not take POA's (nor do they have to) so make sure anything to do with the bank is resolved before he leaves. I've seen a lot of military wives run into problems with the bank.
I called our pediatrician and they said "as long as it's the 'general' Tricare". They are taking patients that use Tricare right now. So, does that help me?
Definitely, get your bank's power of attorney form, as Melissa is right - most banks will not accept any other form. You want a property/assets power of attorney for everything else, and the legal office on the base or a lawyer working with your dh's unit should have that available. Check all insurance policies and any retirement programs, etc., to make sure the beneficiary is listed as you want it. If you have any investment accounts, be sure to get their power of attorney forms also. Most powers of attorney and some beneficiary forms need to be notarized, so try to do them all at once to minimize costs, and get at least two copies of each form notarized, one to send to the entity and one for your files.
"General" Tricare is probably referring to Tricare Standard. This has more out of pocket expense, but it's not too bad. I used Standard in FL when I first got pregnant with the kids. Call Tricare, or go to the local office (If you are near a base) to discuss the specifics of Standard, and the cost shares.
Tricare standard may be a better decision for you if you are nowhere near a base. I think you have to get a prior authorization if you are not seen at a MTF (Military Treatment Facility) through Tricare Prime. I don't know if reservists have the same co-pay but for active duty the co-pay for Standard isn't bad at all.
Reservists on Active Duty do have the same co-pay, when I was on it my ex was NG, but activated post-9/11. If you are on Prime, and more than 50 miles away from a MTF, you can choose your primary care doc out of the providers, but the list is often scarce. The Standard list gives more options.
I looked at your list, and though I can't offer any help from the military wife side of it, I can say something in regards to credit cards. When my husband and I got married, we got rid of my credit cards and added my name to all of his. Well, come to find out, I could not activate cards or have any say so on what to do for any of those accounts. Apparently, there are two ways to be on the account. One is as an authorized user. This means you can use the card, but cannot do anything with the account. The other is a joint account holder (or something to that effect.) This second way makes you also responsible for the account. Just thought I'd let you know so that you don't run into any trouble with cc companies.
Ditto Nancy...do keep that in mind. Do you have your own credit cards? Can you just use those, transfer any balances, and file his away for the time being?
Hiedi, I'm civilian but live near an army base. I know there are many organizations that "tend" to mothers/wives of deployed soldiers, you may want to attend a function with them before he leaves, they may have insight on things to do as well as become a support system while he is there.
THANKS EVERYONE!! You guys have been so helpful...
Call them. Here is a link for the SCRA, it will tell you more about your legal protections (lower mortgage APR too!!) and you can use it when you check with the Dept of Ed.
Yes, college loans can be deferred. You just fill out a form and mark the reason. Also, you may want to look into whether or not the loans can be partially or totally forgiven.
No advice, but WOW--so much to do! (((Heidi)))
I've not been on much lately but do we know yet if he is headed over to the sand box? I haven't had time to read all the other posts but if he is, if I were you I would hold off on that laptop unless its really somthing you were wanting to keep at home incase his command says its a no go. The first deployment over there was an absolute no go for us for the laptop. The second deployment was only for essential personel, my husband was one of them and we wish he would have just left it home. He was not able to have internet hooked up to it and it came back very dusty, inside and out not to mention they had to have the hard drives completly erased before they brought them back. They will most likely have computers with internet set up that he can use over there.
If you are not already listed on all of his accounts through the bank you must go to the bank and have their POA filled out.. Because it will be a pain in the rear other wise. My BIL was deployed (NG) for 18 months. Every time my sister would try to transfer funds through the auto banking line, to their account it was very upsetting. She would have to go in to the local branch, in person, with all her paper work (POA and his order papers) to get anything done.. It upset her every time. If he had filled out the POA through the bank it would have listed her on his work account which was where they had the guard money direct deposited. They did this because their logic was... He had a debit on the work account, he could use the debit and she wouldn't have to check the balances. He knew that the funds in there would be so much per pay roll and he had access to the much. Basically, there wouldn't be any issues with not being able to call and say "honey, I used X amount out of the debit to buy calling cards." or other needed items and he wasn't doing with out because he knew how much funds he had. But with out the POA through the bank she had to jump hoops every time. Another suggestion would be to set up a contact person through your bank. Meaning someone you deal with directly when you call in. A contact person that is aware of the situation,so you don't have to explain it over and over. Like I said it upset my sister every time she had to explain. And being a non military town the number of NG people are low, so it meant explaining to a lot of people.
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