A humbling experience
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A humbling experience
I know I've been having a pity party for myself the past 2 weeks. I've been upset over the minor damage/problems we've had from the hurricane, but I think that the *real* issue was this was the icing on the cake, with everything we've been through this year, much of which you all know, and some things I haven't really told many people.
I had a very humbling experience this week. Another friend from high school, lived in Lakeview, which, for those who don't know, is one of the areas of New Orleans that was flooded when the levee on the 17th St. canal broke. She lost both her home and her catering business, the home was insured, the business wasn't.
It so happens that her BIL lives in my subdivision and she and her DH and kids are staying with them.
She walked over for a visit and was sitting in my den sobbing. The enormity of their loss really hit me. She is enrolling her kids in the schools in my Parish, has gotten food stamps since she is now out of work and has no income, they've filed the usual FEMA and insurance claims. She was unable to take all of her photos, and that was very painful. This is the friend who my sisters and I had dinner with the weekend we cleaned out my mom's apartment, this is the friend who brought the photo album from high school and we all reminisced.
I realized that I truly don't have much to complain about. She and her family will have to start again from scratch. They have to deal with all the local and government red tape and decide if they are going to rebuild in the same location or move somewhere else.
This makes 5 people I know who've lost their homes. I was lucky, if this storm had not turned east when it did, it's likely I'd be in the same situation.
I believe that when you have a loss or issue that directly affects you, it shouldn't be minimized just because it may not be a *major* loss - after all, it IS changing your life, so for you, it's a big deal. But in the grand scheme of things, there are always others who are much worse off than you, and 5 of my friends are definitely coping with greater losses and problems than I am. I just felt a bit embarrassed by all my ramblings. A lesson learned, for sure.....
(((Karen))) I do totally understand. Take it as a lesson and be thankful for what you have. It's all you can do. I'm sorry any of your are having to suffer any kind of loss at all.
Wow. What does her DH do? Is he able to work? That must be SO hard on her and the kids. What a traumatic experience to say the least. We'll keep her in our prayers. Can we mail her a letter of encouragement? heidi henkel @ hotmail. com
Karen,
I am sorry for your friend's loss. I'm glad you are looking on the positive side, and at what you still have. Just make sure you don't minimize what you have been through just because others have been through worse (I know you touched on this point in your post, but I wanted to make sure you really believed it in your heart - that you *do* have a right to be angry and upset over what happened!)...The old adage "I felt bad because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet" is true, but the man with no shoes still has feet that are sore, cold, and wet  You are ALL in our prayers, constantly! {{Hugs}}
"I felt bad because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet" My grandmother used to use that expression all the time.
I'm sure they will land on their feet. She told me her DH still has his job, so they are not totally without an income. She's very artistic, and has done jewelry design in the past for Mignon Faget and Adler's Jewelers. She told me she may pursue something like that again. She said even though their catering business brought in a nice income, it was very hard work, and she was tired of working 7 days a week at it. She did have something like 10 or 12 employees though, and they are now out of work too.
I guess Pam finds out this week how badly her home is damaged and if anything can be salvaged. Residents were allowed to start returning to her area yesterday.
A little bit of humor - yesterday I made a sign at work, in big red letters it says Rotting meat, fowl and fish, please pick up! LOL I placed it on the bags of food on the curb.
I'm so sorry for your friend. I can't imagine losing everything!
When Sheboygan had the flood 7 years ago, some people lost foundations and had EXPENSIVE repairs. One group of people lost their neighborhood, when the city decided the houses weren't going to be rebuilt there, so the 18" of water that I had in my basement really was minor, compared to a lot of people.
Everyone felt bad about discussing their problems after Katrina. But still your problems are real and they make you feel bad. Just because someone else has worse problems doesn't mean your problems aren't worth getting off you chest.
I am a big believer in not keeping things in. Ask John it bothers him.
Feona, that is *me* to the core. If it's upsetting me inside, I HAVE to get it out. Learned that a long time ago. Better out than in - if you keep it in, it destroys you.
On another positive note, when I got home yesterday, my neighbor offered up her DH, out of the blue, to haul off all my stinky rotting garbage! I want to do something nice for them, he took every single bag of it!
This morning, I got up early and drove around for 2 hours taking photos of the cleanup in progress in various areas. Not sure why I did this, except that this is *history*, and like everything else, I'll keep a photo log of it.
LOL Karen, I guess the signs worked!!
Karen, I always try to figure out logical explanations for everything. It helps me get my mind around it, and somehow makes it easier to cope. When the unimaginable happens, I'm really at a loss. You have just been through what I consider the unimaginable. If coming here to tell us what it's like, helps you to cope, then don't feel guilty at all. I have found your posts so helpful to add some reality to this tragedy. Post away Dear Friend.
I agree with Bea. I'm very far away from everything that has happened there and hearing from you adds alot of reality to this tragedy for me. I am truly sorry for your loss and the loss of everyone else.
As for saying that you feel what you've been through is so much less than what so many others have been...if I never wanted to post because of that I would never post. So many of my little "tragedies" seem so small compared to everything that happens to other people all over the world everyday, yet to me their big and I have to get them out somewhere.
I think that taking photo's of it all (or as much as you want too) is a great idea! Everyone who see's your pictures (if you show them) will get idea's of how bad it really is.
(((((((((((((((( Karen ))))))))))))))))))
Ditto Bea. With Karen posting and others posting pics it has really helped me realize just how bad things are for some people.
Since we are not there to see all the devestation, it really puts reality into it with the postings.
And girlfriend you ramble here anytime, we are always here for you{{{Karen}}}
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