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Moms View Message Board: General Discussion Archive: Archive July 2005: I don't know what to do
I am currently watching a 3 month old little girl every day, from 7:30am to about 6:00pm. This was supposed to be temporary for this month and then next month, she was going to go back to her original nanny.. There was a family emergency so she couldn't do it this month. The nanny called the little girls mom today and told her that she had to come and get all her stuff because she can't do it anymore. Now she has no one to watch her baby. I am supposed to watch a 6 month old little boy 1 to 2 days a week starting in August. The longest is from 8:00am to 3:30 pm or from 12:00pm to 5:00pm. I am making pretty good money watching this baby now, and will be getting less in a month(about $120)than I make in a week($135) watching the little boy. I want to watch the little girl too so I can have more money saved up for the new baby, whenever that may be, but I don't want to take time away from my daughter too. What should I do?
Well, personally, *I* would not continue with the little girl with that particular schedule. That is a loooong day and leaves you with no private time with Rylee. If you can afford not to take her on full time, I would do that. I certainly wouldn't keep the little girl AND add on the little boy. But that's just me. Perhaps Cat can tell us how her boys have felt sharing their mom with 'daycare kids'. It does give Rylee playmates, but it also takes you away from her. You have to choose....either NO extra kids and all Rylee all the time, or just the baby and no Rylee private time, or just the little boy and most days would be private Rylee time, or all three children and no Rylee time and a very busy Rayanne! I think if you're looking to save some extra money I'd just take on the little boy as planned. You don't know when your next child will actually arrive and in the meantime you don't want to miss out on Rylee's childhood. And you'll still be bringing in some extra money even though it's less than you wanted.
hmm tought call, I might consider doing both. ONe thing about adding extra kids, is in some ways it does take away from rylee, but there are other good things, learning to share, being the big girl, etc. Also I am a routine person, things seem like less of a job if I do them everyday, it just becomes part of life, but an every other day thing is hard for me. Good luck in your decision.
I'm interested in hearing Cats story about how her boys took to "daycare" kids as well.
I think in home day care is too much, I've had friends that have done it, but it's just like anytime mom is taken away from family, your own kids suffer, so IMO it's worse than working outside the home, because it appears to your own kids that the daycare kids are more important because the schedule revolves around them and thier families schedule, not your own. If you need a little extra money, a great way to acheive it is working 2-3 nights a week, waitressing or home parties are the best, quick money for little hours. Plus the hours you are talking about does that $$ include diapers, food etc, because if not, you are really making pennies! If I read that right 120/month?? for 12 hours a day?
She provides the diapers and formula and everything. I get $135 a week for the baby and $120 a month for the little boy. The little boy will only be at my house one day a week.
I had a friend who does in home day care, has for years. Her kids loved having extra kids around to play with. My friend loaded up everyone and took them to the park and stuff, so it wasn't like they were all stranded at home.
I have baby-sat 2 kids since they were 6 weeks old. They are now ages 6 and 8. I pick them up from school now and have them for 4 hours a day. When they were infants they slept a lot so I never felt like they took away from my children. As they got older they became playmates for my kids. I looked at it as getting paid for a play date. They are now considered my second family. I still did everything I wanted to with them. If you start right off taking kids places they learn right away how to behave and adapt (babies). We did trips to the park, zoo, ran errands, etc on a weekly basis. It was no harder with 4 than it was with 2. I would do it on a trial basis and see how it works. You may be pleasantly surprised!
I was the child of a daycare mom and I can tell you that I rarely felt second best to the daycare kids. *Most* of the time, with kids, it's a case of the more, the merrier. I always had a playmate and I had a preschool type environment every day. If you think that kind of schedule is too much for you, then don't do it but I don't think Rylee is going to suffer for having an extra child or two in the home. I know you've talked of bringing in extra income several times and this is one way to bring that in. It sounds like you have so many different options that you're paralyzed with the choices. I can't tell you what to do but think about how YOU can handle it. Rylee will adapt and, really, it isn't that much different than if there was another sibling to be sharing your attention with. {{{Rayanne}}} Don't you hate this tough decisions?
My boys are much older than your dd, so my story would be different. That being said my kids love me taking care of other kids--most of the time. There will always be some kids my boys don't like or get along with. Usually if it's a real problem (only happened twice in the past 6 years) I'll drop that daycare child. My boys get upset with me if I have a day off during the week. Like this past Monday Robin got up around 8 and came upstairs and asked where the daycare kids were. I told him it was a holiday and no one was coming. He was very bummed. I do have to say that from 7:30am-6pmis a very long day. Right now I have kids from 7:30am-5:30pm. Once school starts that will change to 6:30am-4:30pm (or 7-5). I try to keep it down to 10hrs a day. It's still a long day without any real breaks. As for taking the little boy in addition to the little girl, if it's only one or two days a week and you feel you can manage it, I say go for it. I'm cutting back this fall since I'll be hsing Robin (three full time kids only--no part time or drop in, and down from 4-5 full time kids). I'm even considering quiting all together in about a year or two. I don't know yet. We got home last Thursday around noon and I didn't have kids Friday, plus the weekend and Monday being a holiday so I was off for basically 5 days straight. I gotta tell you, my house has never been so clean!!! lol I'm not sure I could quit without being bored out of my mind. Although, I'm sure I could find something to do...
IF the little boy is only one day a week then you will only have all of them one day a week. Try it and see how it works for you. I don't think it will be much of a problem
One other thing. With Rylee only being 1 (right?) and the other kids only being 3mo and 6mo, you have to consider if that alone may be too much to handle. In my state I'm not allowed to have more than two kids under the age of 2yo including my own. Other states are different, though. That's just the rule here.
I was thinking of taking in a few kids next year, however, I was only going to take children of teachers. This way I could have my summers and holidays off and the children would probably be picked up earlier than those of parents who worked in a different fields. As I would already have 2 of my own I would not take on more than 2 more. Just a thought.
I am just afraid of how Rylee will feel. If I do decide to do this, I am only going to take care of both until I am 6 or 7 months pregnant...that is, when I do get pregnant. I told the mom that today, and she understood. I want to do it, so that I can save up money for things we will need to buy for the new baby, and I don't want to because I want to do as much as possible with just Rylee and I alone. I am not all about taking other kids anywhere. I am afraid to, because if something should happen, I could never forgive myself. AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! What to do?!
Why don't you see if she can find someone for part of each week. Then you could still have a few days off with Rylee. What if she could find someone for 2 days a week and you keep her the other 3. That would give you extra money and give you a break and alone time with Rylee. Or tell her you are going to try this for a few months and see what happens but the possibility is there that you will not be able to do it if you see it taking away too much time from Rylee.
The other thing I would add is that if you are watching the boy 1x/week and getting paid $120 you are making $30/day for a 5-7.5 hour day. You are only making $27/day for the girl and it is a 10.5 hour day. I think if you decided to keep the little girl I would charge more. At the very least I would charge $30/day for her as well and make a policy about late pick-up. Around here if you are more than 15 minutes late you pay an additional $20/15 minutes...it certainly makes sure parents pick up their children on time.
I provided daycare for several kids when mine were young. It was wonderful for me to able to stay home with them, and great for them to have playmates all the time. They loved it!
I still have not made up my mind 100%, but Chris soesn't really want me to do it. He feels bad for Rylee. He knows that the money would help, but thinks that she is more important and I couldn't agree more. He still says that it is up to me, but he wanted to let me know how he felt. I might just so it until they can find someone, that way I can put some money away for the new baby.
You don't sound like you want to do it so I wouldn't. Please take into consideration the situations of the folks you will be dealing with. If they know it is a temporary situation that is one thing. Otherwise, they need to be able to look for permanent childcare.
They knew that this was only a temporary situation. I was only supposed to watch her for this month, and then she was going to go back to her other nanny. Things changed and they asked me if I would consider doing it full time. I just haven't given them an answer yet. I told them that i would think about it.
I think you've gotten a lot of good advice above. It sounds to me like you don't really want to keep the little girl. I suggest that you either give them a deadline to find new childcare, or work out something that is only a few days a week. Either way, if you do keep watching her, you should be charging a lot more. I am not clear on what you are being paid for the little girl, and what you will be paid for the little boy.
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Good luck with whatever you decide. You can always post here for advise and you're more than welcome to email me anytime. cathyliz @ bigfoot.com (without the spaces)