I just want to ask for some advice. A friend has a daughter and the father is only half involved, but the grandparents on the fathers side is heavily involved. My friend wants to try to sit down and work out a communication plan so that they will be able to parent this child together and be able to communicate even though their relationship is over. The child is 4 years old and the parents are young like 21 and 22. They have been apart since the child was born. He gets upset everytime she tries to ask or talk about something concerning the child. Now she is not the best communicator. She gets very emotional and we all know (or should) that is is difficult for men to listen when we are overly emotional all the time. So I know many of you ladies have btdt so anything will help. What would you say to them. She is asking me for advice and I have not experienced it at all and don't know what to say to either of them.
Julie

By Reeciecup on Friday, June 17, 2005 - 09:06 am:

Julie, Have your friend try to find a mediation program where she lives. Some communities have them affiliated with Court systems but they usually work with the community as a whole (not just people in the system) If her area has one she can contact them to set up mediation to try to address the important issues of raising a child under her circumstances. The mediator can help keep things neutral and on track. It should be "interest based mediation" so that it doesn't lapse into what everyone did wrong in the relationship. Hopefully this would be something available to her. She might also try her local domestic relations or juvenile court system. They might have an in house mediator that she could work with to address issues. Good luck to her.

By Crystal915 on Friday, June 17, 2005 - 02:09 pm:

Julie, I wish I had some advice for you, but co-parenting is not working well for my ex (or his family) and me. It's hard, it takes a LOT of work, and I think mediation is a great idea.

By Juli4 on Friday, June 17, 2005 - 02:12 pm:

thank you all