I have a question... maybe kind of silly though

My girls are still young so I am not all that "experienced" with this part of it. My 3 1/2 year old has obviously watched some movies and been around mommy and daddy enough to start 'kissing'. Here is the situation and we don't quite know how to handle it, dd wants to kiss her daddy on the lips LIKE CINDERELLA. It is funny, kind of, but at the same time dh doesn't really know what to say. He just says "no kissing daddy on the lips". And we leave it at that. She laughs and goes on. Is this normal behavior? She loves her daddy sooo much. She doesn't want to kiss me like that, only her daddy.. lol

Any experience?

By Palmbchprincess on Saturday, April 30, 2005 - 11:52 pm:

What's wrong with kissing Daddy on the lips? My kids pucker up all the time, and they'll be 3 next month. I mean obviously a closed mouth kiss is in order, but a peck should be no problem. Am I misunderstanding? Do they want a romantic, drawn-out kiss? If so, you can explain that that is an "adult" kiss for mommies and daddies (or for when you are married, something simple so she can tell the difference), and show her what type of kiss she can give her daddy.

By Emily7 on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 12:01 am:

I agree with Crystal, my kids both kiss on the lips.

By Pamt on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 12:11 am:

Another ditto for lip kissing being okay as long as it's a quick closed mouth peck.

By Marcia on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 12:16 am:

My girls all kiss daddy on the lips.

By Tink on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 12:37 am:

My kids all kiss on the lips too. We don't make a big deal about it. My son is starting to become shy about kissing me so I offered to kiss him on the cheek but both of my girls are still comfortable with it. My kids don't usually kiss other adults, even family, on the lips.

By Unschoolmom on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 03:04 am:

Candis, do you mean she wants the kiss to be more like a romantic kiss from Cinderella? Not just a quick kiss? If so, yeah, my daughter did that too. I think they're young enough that they don't quite get the difference between an expression of romantic love and the love they feel for their daddy. They just see a boy and girl kissing, it's a nice moment and they want to pretend or share it with the availible guy in their life.

When Catherine tried this we explained that different kisses say different things and that that kind of kiss was for two adults who loved each other like mommy and daddy did. She could still kiss on the lips but in a daughter-daddy way.

By Beth on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 08:18 am:

Well I grew up in a household where we always just kissed on the cheek. I don't have a problem with kissing your children on the lips. It just wasn't what we did. So I guess that is why it just makes me personally uncomfortable. However, my son wants to do that. He will aske me sometimes why not and I will let him. It's a small normal peck but its hard for me sometimes but I don't make a big deal about it. Again only because its not what I was used to. Anyway I say go with what you feel comfortable with. I think its more a comfort thing then a right or wrong.

By Reds9298 on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 08:23 am:

I agree about kissing on the lips. I still kiss my dad on the lips!!! I also agree with unschoolmom about just explaining the difference between kisses. When I was little(after watching soaps!) I started trying to kiss my dad with a closed mouth kiss but turning my head from side to side like I saw on the soaps! They explained to me that wasn't appropriate and it was over, no big deal.

By My2cuties on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 08:56 am:

OMGoodness, I am so sorry. I meant she wants to kiss him for a loooong time on the lips, not just a peck (but with a closed mouth). I thought by saying Cinderella everyone would know what I meant. *blushing* I still kiss my papa on the lips too. We are trying to teach her the difference, I guess I just thought someone might have gone through something like this. Thanks.

By Jann on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 09:36 am:

My dd went through a phase like that. It's very natural. This is her first love in her life. Make sure your husband doesn't push her away or make her feel badly, just reinforce that mommys and daddys have a way of kissing and daddys and their little girls have a special way of kissing. Maybe change up their kiss to instead of a peck, adding something like butterfly kisses to it, but something that is just their kiss.

By Karen~moderator on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 10:25 am:

Ditto Jann. And I will add this - if you make a VERY big deal out her kissing Daddy on the lips, and make her feel like she is doing something *dirty*, it could have long reaching effects on her.

Jann has great advice, and I will also add this - do not wait until your kids are older - as in teens - before you talk about sex and procreation and relationships to them. Of course, your DD is too young, unless she has specific questions, of course, but you need to start talking to them when they are young and KEEP talking to them.

Sex and affection are not dirty things, so you don't want to teach them that they are. BUT they DO have a special place in a relationship/marriage, and your kids will need to be taught that.

Kissing on the lips is not wrong or dirty, but there are kisses, and then there are KISSES!

By Melanie on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 11:06 am:

Our 4 year old still does this on rare occasions. She takes my cheeks in her hands, tilts her head, closes her eyes and kisses me. We figured if we made a big deal of it, it would last longer. She went through a few weeks of doing it a lot and then it just dropped off.

I think it's perfectly normal.

By Juli4 on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 11:18 am:

my daughter who is 4 did that at that age also. It was almost like the longer and harder she kissed him the more she loved him sorta. My husband didn't say anything about it. He just would say ok thats enough after about 30seconds. I don't think she meant it to be romantic at the time. I do know what you are talking about though. I wouldn't worry too much. Just say something like "thats enough silly" and distract her like tickle her or something. She will move on and will understand better later.

By Palmbchprincess on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 12:30 pm:

Ditto Jann as well. BTW, my step-dad (who came into my life at age 8) and I used to give "Eskimo kisses", and he'd say "Rubbin' noses like the Eskimoses!" I still do that with my kids. I still think just a simple "There are different kisses for Mommies and Daddies" should suffice. HTH!!

By My2cuties on Sunday, May 1, 2005 - 05:27 pm:

We do not make it sound dirty or make her feel bad for it. Like I said he just says kiss daddy on the cheek instead. If he laughs and they play around, then she keeps wanting to do it because she thinks she is doing something funny. She does love her daddy and just the other day they started the butterfly kisses so maybe that will help. I know that she doesn't feel bad about doing it and I want to make sure she doesn't ever feel bad for loving her daddy. I was just curious and wanted to ask a question about this. I didn't have my dad around when I was small and I am just loving watching her with her daddy. Thanks alot for all the input.