Do you eat together as a family? We do and my oldest dd is such a slow eater! I don't know whether I should be sitting with her for the 45min to an hour that she takes or if I can leave when the rest of the family does. Should we all be sitting there waiting for her to finish up? I just hate to see her sitting there all by herself while we all go about our evening activities. The rest of the family is done in about half an hour and cleanup only takes ten minutes so she is in the kitchen by herself for quite a while some nights.

By Rayanne on Tuesday, March 1, 2005 - 09:40 pm:

Yes we do. If Rylee has already eaten because she can't wait for us, then she still sits with us and has her snack which is usually cheerios.

By Rayanne on Tuesday, March 1, 2005 - 09:42 pm:

What about sitting with her and talking about her day as she eats? I know that it can be frustrating. I say sit with her if you do not have other things to do. Hopefully, someone can be morehelpful, because I haven't croosed that bridge yet.

By Palmbchprincess on Tuesday, March 1, 2005 - 09:53 pm:

I live with the human vacuum boys, N and Shane can finish a meal in no time flat.Mads is like Sami, takes for. ev. er! to finish, but if she is taking particularly long because she's distracted, she'll sit by herself. Honestly, I would have everyone sit together for a reasonable amount of time, and if she takes longer, she can finish alone. Does everyone clean the table up together? If so, I'd have that wait until she's done, so it doesn't seem unfair to the other kids ("She never helps because she takes forever to eat!")

By Trina~moderator on Tuesday, March 1, 2005 - 09:59 pm:

Is she actually eating all that time or dawdling? I can't see making the whole family sit to wait for her. Gosh, I *wish* my kids would sit longer. They're done in 15-20 minutes.

By Annie2 on Tuesday, March 1, 2005 - 10:27 pm:

After everyone else is done, I would let her finish her dinner while reading her book, newspaper or magazine. She should not be rushed nor should family members have to wait for her.

By Fraggle on Wednesday, March 2, 2005 - 09:32 am:

We eat together, but my DDs are usually done in 10 minutes and see it as a great time to run around the table. Usually DH and I send them to the family room so we can finish eating alone. I wouldn't make everyone sit there with her while she finishes-I was wondering the same thing as Trina, is she actually eating that whole time?

By Alberobello on Wednesday, March 2, 2005 - 09:49 am:

I'll be the one to disagree here. I would still make everyone wait until she finishes. But also to make her eat quicker why don't you try not giving her any food or milk a few hours before dinner? I know that if my son eats ONE cookie a couple of hours before dinner it spoils his appetite and because he is a bit picky he would take ages if dinner is something he doesn't really like. In the past two weeks i've been doing this: i pick him up from school at 3.45, i give nothing (maybe a clementine) and by 6 he is absolutely starving so he eats everything in plate and doesn't take long. I've had so many problems with my son's eating habits that i wanted to try this and it does help. Maybe it has nothing to do with what you ask, some children are slower at eating than others, but if she is not particularly hungry she won't rush to get food in her mouth.

My mum takes forever to eat and she expects everyone to wait for her. I think is only fair that the family waits for your daughter IMHO!

By Kym on Wednesday, March 2, 2005 - 10:58 am:

We try, but by the time my middle two have claimed everything I've made is disgusting and not fit for human consumption, and got up to make their onw peanut butter sandwich, the rest of us are done and annoyed And this is supposed to bring the family together right!lol, we do get some chit chat time in but it's bit frustrating to say the least. No real slow eaters in my family, everyone has something to do!lol

By Tink on Wednesday, March 2, 2005 - 11:55 am:

Yes, she is eating almost all of the time. She is a talker and I do have to remind her to eat occasionally. She is a picky eater but that doesn't seem to be the problem. She just doesn't care about food and will get to it in her own time.

We have 45 minutes of alone time each afternoon when she talks nonstop so I know it isn't a lack of quality conversation time.

My other two dks still take nearly a half hour to eat and I can't imagine asking them to sit still for another half hour just to watch her eat.

Each family member is responsible for clearing their place and I put up the leftovers and rinse out the dishes in the same room so she isn't sitting so forlorn, ignored by everyone.

I hadn't thought of letting her read but I know she'd love it. I'm just not sure if that wouldn't be encouraging her to take longer. She is out of school at 3 so she gets a piece of fruit or veggies when she gets home but she doesn't eat for the three hours leading up to dinner. I don't think it is a lack of appetite, rather a lack of interest in food and she's ALWAYS that way. BTW, Maria, what is a clementine?

I can't see sitting with her when my other two kids (3 and 5yo) are doing as they want in other rooms of the house. Evening are usually pretty busy around here!

Thanks for all the input. I'm really unsure of how to handle this.

By Melanie on Wednesday, March 2, 2005 - 12:18 pm:

I don't really see much of a problem, Tink. Studies have shown that it is better if you eat slower. You don't tend to eat as much because you give your brain time to get the message that you are full. Let her go at her pace. She's not fooling around, she's just eating slow. Most of the time she is with the family. She's obviously okay with all of you moving on to the rest of the routines while she finishes. I would just continue on as you have been. It seems to be working just fine.

Oh, and clementines are small, seedless (okay, very small seeds) oranges. They are sweet and yummy!

By Colette on Wednesday, March 2, 2005 - 12:19 pm:

I wouldnt make everyone sit and wait for her. That's just going to stress her (and everyone else) out. Can't you just be around her (starting to clean up or something) while she finishes up, or just sit and talk to her while she finishes up. I would let her read once in a while, but not every night. I see she is about the same age as my youngest who also talks NON STOP, and always has. Dh walks around the house imitating her ("mum, mum, mum? MUM! mum) Just enjoy it and let her talk.

oh, and a clementine is like a small, sweet, orange, and they are very easy for kids to peel. My kids LOVE them.