I have an awful habit I'm having trouble kicking. I swear too much, I work in a mans environment with my husband, so I hear a lot of unpleasant things all day at work. However I know this is no excuse. I try very hard when around my young girls to not say a bad word. I usually do ok and remember to use a silly substitute word. When I'm stressed or rushed or angry or get flustered I tend to let a few rip. I always appologise after and go through the naughty mummy thing, but my girls copy me at times and I don't want to be a bad influence. Are there any ways you mums can think of to stop swearing?

By Ginny~moderator on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 03:18 am:

I pretty much stopped after I heard my first son, then about 3, say "dod dam cat". What I did was substitute other words or phrases. To this day, when I am frustrated, I say "fudge" or "God bless it".

But then, I am of a different generation. When I was growing up, people didn't use swear words around women or little girls, so it was never part of what I heard. And the "f" word was almost never used by anyone except when it was all men together in a bar or in a fight.

I suggest you work at substituting some combination of words that you know are expressing your frustration or anger - and expect your children to pick that up too and repeat it. But unless you want your daughters to come out with some really juice phrase in front of a teacher or pastor, you'll have to do something about changing your vocabulary.

By Karen~moderator on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 08:42 am:

I will be the first to admit that I've had a potty mouth at times in the past. I have worked with nothing but men for over 25 years, and you hear a lot, and unfortunately, pick some of it up.

I have made a concerted effort in recent years to clean up my potty mouth. When you hear a total stranger using those words, it's a slap in the face and you realize that's what *you* must sound like. I heard a well dressed woman in the mall, no less, using all the potty words that have become so *common* now, and my first thought was that it was incredbily disgusting and trashy, and that I'd be embarrassed to be seen with her, or even have a conversation with her. I certainly didn't want anyone feeling that way about me. LOL

You could always tape yourself - that would give you a nasty wakeup call. LOL Then you'd hear yourself as your girls might if they heard you.

All I can say is to try and *train* yourself to think your words before you let them escape your mouth - that will help, for sure.

By Conni on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 08:51 am:

When I do slip up in front of my kids I immediately look at them and apologize. I tell them that Mom was wrong to talk that rudely, God doesnt like that, etc...

I usually slip up while driving--people are getting to wear they drive real rude here and nearly run you off the road. But it is no excuse for me to let a word fly in front of them and I know it.

You could always have your kids put you in time out when you slip up! ;) Or wash your mouth out.

By Mrsheidi on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 09:12 am:

I did a speech in a college class one time (it was supposed to be on a pet peeve) and I started off saying "The crazy cat walked across the crazy street. Then, all of the sudden, this crazy woman chased after the crazy cat in a crazed fashion....etc".
The point was that that's what it's like to hear people cuss, especially when they do it over and over. It just plain gets old. It's not something you want to do, it's something you choose to get in the habit of.
It just takes practice getting out of the habit. It's worth it to practice better language, especially when you've "created" habits in your own children and you send them off into the world knowing that you taught them not only to not swear, but you've taught them self control. I think that's the underlying issue. JMHO of course...it's a huge pet peeve of mine. I digress....

By Reds9298 on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 09:52 am:

hillsmum- you're not alone! I have a terrible potty mouth...don't know why, just do. It's awful. My dd is only 7mths, but I'm STARTING to watch it. Still not good, but it has improved a little. I really only swear around immediate family and mostly dh, so most people that know me would never dream I could cuss like a sailor! haha. My dh and I are both working on it. It's a hard habit to break. Good luck to us both!

By Missmudd on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 11:39 am:

I have been know to be a potty mouth, and w/ 4 boys + dh I allow myself some leaway. However when #1 ds was about 3 I was driving down the freeway and he said, look mommy car, look mommy cop, look mommy TRUCKER, except it wasnt trucker. I was floored. And it stopped me from using that particular adjective and made me watch what I was saying while driving. So I am mostly reformed but I still slip everyonce in a while.

By Kay on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 12:30 pm:

Get yourself a 'swear jar' - whenever you say something you shouldn't, you have to put a certain amount of money in it...this should be across the board for the entire family. Use the money to do a special family event - movie, etc.

Each month, it would be a visual reminder of either how far you've come, or how far you've slipped.

By My2cuties on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 01:39 pm:

I cussed from the time I was 15 until I met my DH, I have got mad and said a few words I am not proud of but I do not swear now, it was kind of hard getting out of the habit too, I would bite my tongue (I think I had quite a few sores on my tongue from that..LOL). But the thing I need to work on is driving, my kids are in the backseat saying GO, GO, GO....I just laugh to myself and think I really need to slow down, and stop telling people to get out of my way..oops!

By Palmbchprincess on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 01:54 pm:

I'm another potty mouth, but I definitely need to curb the language near my children. I think the tips here are worth a shot!

By Hillsmum on Saturday, February 19, 2005 - 10:29 pm:

Thnx for all the advice, it's nice to know i'm not the only one. lol.
I've noticed by substituting funny words in place of a swear, we all crack up and the situation is much more friendly.
Kay when ever we decide to get the swear jar out, it always ends up full of IOUs.lol