One of my New Year's Resolutions is to try to deal with issues that bother me in a more positive manner. One of the issues I deal with a lot is how much I let pretentious people bother me. We live in a pretty affluent area and have personally made the decision to live within our means but there are a lot of people who either live beyond their means or just have a LOT of money....for ex.private schools, Hummers, etc. For some reason these folks just make me feel so inferior.Not the ones who are genuinely nice, just the ones who feel it is necessary to shove their lifestyle down your throat.I can't change these people but I can change how i respond to their behaviors. I am just not sure how to change my responses! How do I feel good about my choices (which I deep down really do) without feeling so darn crummy (jealous, etc) after my interactions with these folks?

By Trisa on Monday, January 10, 2005 - 07:28 pm:

I am sure most of us feel
this way a times. Some people are just rich.
BUT MANY people are just wayyyyy in debt.
I try to remember that when I take my son to
visit friends who live in a very rich neighborhood! I always think the same thing.
What do these people do for a living that they can buy a home for 450,000 and up???
We could have lots more money if I worked but I
wanted to stay home with my kids. Some rich people
do not brag. But some do and yes its hard to listen week after week. Listen to all the new stuff the got. I even had a lady tell me that it was going to be another $4,000 Christmas, meaning she spends that much on her kids for Christmas. She has two kids! But yes it is at times hard not to be just a little jelous.

By My2cuties on Monday, January 10, 2005 - 07:55 pm:

Eventually most people pull out of financial bondage..please do not feel jealous. You may be there one day and you do not have to act like those who brag about their money and things. ((hugs)) Chin up and just take it with a grain of salt and go on, if they like to brag just say wow that's nice you can get that or do that.

By Mrsheidi on Monday, January 10, 2005 - 08:37 pm:

What is sad, is that these people who, I think, waste their money on extravagant things are really missing the point. I honestly feel sorry for people like that. I have cousins that are like that...their only conversation one time was about these $220 pair of jeans they got online...boring, boring, boring. I almost feel that those people fill their lives with things they don't really need and are actually quite empty.
Not all "rich" people are this way...I know a lot of families who have great homes but they go on month-long missions all the time, volunteer, and give a lot of it to the needy in the form of education, etc.
My only advice is that things aren't always what they seem...trust me.

By Missmudd on Tuesday, January 11, 2005 - 12:00 am:

Write a list of about 5 things that you are doing besides living outside your means like saving for college, reducing your debt, saving for retirement, providing a more reasonable mindset for your kids, whatever the reasons you dont want to spend like the snobs. Stick it in your purse. When people act this way be as polite as you can, then privately read your list. It will help you get past the feeling that maybe all these loonies are right.

By Conni on Tuesday, January 11, 2005 - 10:19 am:

We live in an area like this as well. I ignore these poeple. I find them obnoxious. I tend to run around with the people that are reallyyyyyyyy down to earth. You know the ones who appreciate a good 90% off sale! lol I like those people the best. Dh is the same way.

You just have to decide what you are ok with and arent ok with. Then find friends who are *really* your friends. Find friends that share your same views on life/money/ and not flaunting *things*... And dont worry about the other people.

By Conni on Tuesday, January 11, 2005 - 10:21 am:

BTW- read some Dave Ramsey books and / or some type of finacial books that will reinforce what you are doing with your money. Read *The Millionaire Next Door* (i think thats the name of it)