What do you do when ...
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you are out in public and your toddler misbehaves?
Today we went to the optometrist to get both Matthew and Cameron's eyes checked. Matthew was all over the place but for the most part well behaved. Then we were off to the doctors as Cameron needed a shot. I made Matthew stay in the stroller in the waiting room because I didn't want him running all over the place.
He started to cry and fuss. He was making a lot of nosie. I tried to distract him to no avail and we could not leave so I just ingored his behaviour. I kept getting dirty looks from a young woman in the waiting area who was obviously a university student as she was trying to study while waiting. I remember what I was like before having children and I would often wonder why parents would let their children be so unruly. I wanted to say to the woman who was giving me the looks "If you think you can do better come on over and try".
I realized that it had been a long morning and I should have been better prepared. I remembered that I had some snacks in the diaper bag and this actually worked quite well, wish I would have had a juice as well.
So what do you do when you go out, your child is misbehaving and you cannot leave? Stratigies?
In the pediatrics area, at the clinic where I work and at the clinic on the southside, where I see the doctor, there are activities for little kids. At my doctor's office (family practice, not peds), there are books and puzzles, and a few other things. In the pediatric dept at the big clinic, there is a lot of different hands-on activities to keep kids busy, plus a big fish tank, too.
My kids usually were able to keep themselves busy and not be running around. They also never got a drink from the bubbler and spit the water at someone else's kids. One time, there was a young boy, whose mom was inside seeing the doctor and he was being unsupervised. He spit water at my kids. Finally one of the receptionists said something to him.
Dawn,
The optometrist's office had a play area with toys and this kept him busy for awhile, however our doctor's office used to have a play area but they had a flood last year and when they renovated they didn't put the play area back, too bad really it probably would have helped. Although I really don't want my dks playing with toys where their are sick children around.
I don't think I would leave my kids in the reception area unsupervised. Imagine if you came back out and they were gone!
I watched Supernanny last night, and one of the problems the parents had was that their children acted horribly in public. Supernanny stressed that it helps to let the children choose the activities/toys to bring (within reason, of course) that will keep their interest in the maximum amount of time you think you'll be there.
It's been quite a few years since I had little ones, but I do remember how stressful this could be.
One thing I did when my kids were small was keep a bag of toys in the back of the car that they only played with when we were out and about. It had a small magnadoodle, some books, a game with no loose pieces and some Little People. We had about a year that was chockful of appointments and meetings and this worked so well. I didn't have to have to pack up a bag of toys each time and since they didn't play with those things regularly, it kept their interest longer. Maybe that's something you could do for the future. Otherwise, as much as the people around you might hate it, I think ignoring him was probably your best bet.
I would have taken him out of the stroller so he wouldn't have bothered other people. Picked him up and bounced him on my knee, anything. The woman was probably more annoyed because you were ignoring him instead of trying more tricks (even if they didn't work, at least she'd probably think you were trying to not have him disturb others).
I am not sure if your kids are old enough for this, but how about a little game of I Spy, or Simon Says or singing itsy bitsy spider quietly to them.
Once when we were in the Pediatrician waiting room, my kids and some other kids started playing those games together (with help from us desperate moms) and it made the time go by so much faster.
Bringing toys and snacks works for a while, but after a little bit, they get bored.
It is so hard when they are little and have to wait so long. I feel for you!
Thanks, Tink once again you have great ideas! I do try to bring toys, but I usually stuff them into my bag. Leaving a bag in the car is a great idea.
Bella I like your ideas as well, but they are just a little too young right now. All Matthew wants to do is run around and terrorize people.
Colette he's not a bouncy on the knee type of kid, had I let him run loose that woman would not have been studying but picking her papers off the floor and I would have been apologizing over and over again. He's at a stage right now where he is wired. We were at the vet the other day and all I did was chase him around the whole office. When I tried to hold him on my knee cause there was Doberman in the waiting area he cried and fussed just like he did in the stroller. It seems like the more I try the fussier he gets. He's pushing my buttons these days, but I really am trying not to play into his bad behaviour.
Thanks for all the suggestion, keep em coming.
Gosh,
I just looked at your profile and these guys are still sooooo little. How precious!
I remember those days and truthfully, mine were the same. All over the place. Maybe next time try and leave one with a playmate or hubby so you can concentrate on one. I know there are many times this can't occur but it has always made it somewhat easier for me. 
I usually forget to bring toys, so I am always dealing with keeping the child interested. If we are at a point of getting dirty looks, I pick up the kid and tell the receptionist I will be outside (or in the hall if it is an indoor office)and could they let me know if it is my turn. Then I walk around giving all of us a break. I have never had a bad response from the receptionist. Either they understand completely, or they are just happy to get the loud child out of the waiting room.
Keep toys, books, and snacks at all times in the diaper bag and rotate them out for new ones every week. At this age, books, esp. ones with real photos of toddlers/preschoolers doing stuff were really appealing to them. I also made some "only on-the-go" activities. For example, they loves sports so I cut pictures out of magazines of kids kicking a ball, shooting a basketball, batting, etc. I glued them into a file folder and covered it in clear contact paper. Then I drew and colored a large basketball, tennis ball, soccer, baseball, etc. and put adhesive velcro on the back and beside the "matching" person. I would give him the balls and then he would spend time matching them to the right person.
I probably would have taken him out of the stroller and let him have some contained activity. This age is active and tough, because they are old enough to start to learn some self-control and boundaries, but they are still so active and trying to assert their independence. I started 1-2-3 Magic at 2 years of age and it worked wonderfully. I think his misbehavior was more of a lack of preparation (don't worry--we all have done it---many times! ) so now you know to be extra prepared and ready to entertain for next time. However, blatant misbehaving (i.e., pitching a fit because you can't have a toy)--then I'd do time out. And we've done time-out many a time in the shoe dept at Walmart, a bench at the mall, sitting on a curb, etc. Just b/c you are out and about doesn't mean you can't do time-out.
I've never let my kids play with the toys at the doctors office.There are too many germs.I pack a bag the nite before and have everything ready cuz having enough entertainment is important,you never know how long youre going to wait.First I give them a toy they kinda like,as they get bored I trade it for a more favorite toy by the end of our visit they usually have there cups,which is there favorite thing to have.This actually works really well for me and 3 babies.
I can't say that Natalie has given me too much trouble when we're out and about. The few times she has it's just been crying and directly related to being tired or ill. The once or twice where she's just being trying, or when she has a fit over something at home, I do what you did and completely ignore her. I don't make eye contact with her, I don't talk to her, I completely tune her out. I could care less what anyone else thinks! It's always worked and after about 4min. I've got a quiet kid again.
For me and being out, I keep my snack trap filled with cheerios or teddy grahams at all times, one cup of water, and usually one book. The snacks keep her occupied, then the book, and if it's something we have to do for quite a while, then we do all kinds of songs together. What about bubbles?? I saved a bubble container from a wedding (they're so little) and I keep it in my toy bag for the play therapy I do. Anyway, it would fit easily into a diaper bag, isn't messy, and I bet he would like it. Your little one would, too!
There are no toys in my dr. office, for the "sick" reasons mentioned above. Natalie is just fascinated with the little tables and chairs there and she listens well when I ask her not to do something. For us, she's just learned that when she's not confined in a stroller or cart, she has to obey me or I'm picking her up and she HATES that. We also have a little magna doodle at home, but I haven't taken it anywhere with us yet because it hasn't been needed. I think that's a great idea though. Good luck! From what I see with my friends (who ALL have boys) having a girl seems to be much easier! I'm sure that's a hasty generalization, but the girls we're with are sooooo much more easygoing and laid back than the boys we're with!
Deanna, I think there might be something to the girl theory, however, Matthew turned 2 last week and holy cow have things ever changed. He used to be great when we went out. He would sit happily in his stroller for up to an hour. He would stay with me out of the stroller and listen quite well. But this past week he has been really hard to handle. Not just when we go out but at home as well. He has been really wired and I'm having a hard time getting him to settle into bed at night. I honestly cannot keep him off the dining room table, he will not leave the chandlier alone. The time change has not helped one bit. I guess it's just growing pains. When we are at the doctors today I tried to return Matthew, but the doctor said "No refunds!"
Anyway, it snowed here today, can you believe that?! Once the weather warms up I'm going to run this kid all over the neighbourhood and tire him out. I think he has a little bit of cabin fever and needs to burn off some engery after being cooped up in the house all winter.
Pam, I'm going to have to re-read your post again tomorrow, your file folder idea seems interesting. Thanks.
Dana I thought of going outside, but we were there just to see the nurse for a quick shot and I didn't want to risk missing my chance to get into see her. He was noisy for about 5 mins. the ignoring helped, I guess I was embrassed by the stares and dirty looks.
Thanks everyone! All very good ideas.
Just a note on the file folder games...I have a ga-billion! You can buy a large book of these games at any teacher store, in a variety of skill levels. Just FYI!!
Kay, I watched that too. :-)
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