Just wanted to start with, I know I'm paranoid.... My older son has such difficulties socially and I'm so worried that my four year old will have issues.

Here's what is going on... My four year old is in preschool (he just turned four a few weeks ago). He has been insisting he has a "best" friend, though this person changes every few months. He can not accept that he can be friends with multiple people- it has to be just one person- to the point that he upsets other children. His first "best" friend was devastated when he ignored him for a new person. When I asked his teacher about it at the November conference, she said this was normal development. Is that true? (My other son still hasn't developed friends- he's 9- so I really have nothing to compare it to). It just seems extreme to me- the amount of exclusion he feels towards others.... (I've tried to reason with him- many times. It doesn't work....

By Tink on Tuesday, March 7, 2006 - 11:00 am:

My dd (now 8yo) was this way. She started spreading herself out in kindergarten and is well developed socially now. I wouldn't worry about it at all. My younger dd (4yo) has a new best friend every day or two but will play with anyone at anytime. Don't worry. Your ds sounds pretty normal to me. {{{Laura}}}

By Reds9298 on Tuesday, March 7, 2006 - 02:04 pm:

I wouldn't worry about it. I think it's totally normal. As a K teacher, I saw this ALL the time...this whole thing about "best" friends. I've tried to explain and I just don't think they get it yet. I wouldn't worry!

By Kernkate on Tuesday, March 7, 2006 - 05:27 pm:

Being on the Pre-K bus with 4 and 5 year olds I see this everyday. I try to explain to them that they could have more then one friend at a time but as Deanna said they just don't seem to understand it yet. As we all say "this to shall pass "

By Lauram on Tuesday, March 7, 2006 - 07:16 pm:

Ok- That makes me feel much better. It really bothers me when he shuns the other kids.... I'm just so happy to hear it's typical. PHEW. (He is very gregarious).