Baby #2, Does it get easier?
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Pheew! I'm pooped! I forgot how demanding a newborn can be. He was up more than usual last night and my back is hurting from nursing! I had to pack up the kids to go to a Dr.'s appt. and that was an adventure! I got dressed, and then looked down at my sweatshirt and it was covered with dried spit up! I completely forgot this stage of Motherhood! LOL Shaving my legs is so at the bottom of my list! Thank Heaven it's Winter!
When will I get the hang of this again? This time around, I realize how much I can't get done. Mason just fell asleep and I am running around like a crazy person. Toss in a load of laundry because I'm out of burp cloths, ok, then quickly unload the dishawasher, then put away the pizza that was sitting out from lunch! Aggh!
Not to mention, I have not cooked a real meal in well over a month! DH has been great, but I can't wait until we have a better schedule!
My DD, Syd used to look so adorable when she was off to school. Now, she looks a little disheveled marching into her classroom. LOL She had toothpaste on her shirt the other day and I realized when she was getting out of the car that her pants weren't snapped! Aggh! I felt so bad!
Ok, I just had to vent! I forgot! I'm so looking forward to Spring...
BTW-Mason is 6 weeks tomorrow. I'll try to post some photos when I have a chance. Ha Ha
I'm finding it a little easier with my 8 month old and my two year old, now. But when my baby was born, I was a wreck, too. I think it gets easier because you learn a few tricks and you prioritize. What I started doing was deciding what was most important to get done for the day. If the laundry or dishes piled up, so be it. Try not to overwhelm yourself and get help if you can. Oh, and sleep is a HUGE factor!
Can't wait to see the pics.
It got easier for me once I tried to fit Helen into our daily routine, rather than trying to run my routine around Helen. She adapeted more easily than I could, LOL.
I also did lots of mini jobs. A load of laundry (or two) a day, rather than letting it pile up, a quick house cleaning each day, rather than letting it go for a week and having to spend too much time on it. Ditto Encens on the sleep and the priorities.
It will get easier as you get to know him and he gets to know the world!
Hugs!
Ame
{{{Eve}}} Vent away! Going from 1 to 2 children is a tough transition. Yes, it will get easier with time. As mentioned above, prioritize and break things into small, do-able chunks. Focus on what you did accomplish instead of feeling awful about what you didn't. Keep in mind there will ALWAYS be housework, but there won't always be little ones.
A Mom's Wisdom
My husband came home today and saw me sitting on the couch, toddler on one knee, and baby nursing on the opposite breast. I was trying to turn the pages of a book with the hand not attached to the infant, while listening for the sound of the stove buzzer, which would indicate that tonight's pork chops were at the stage between "well-done" and the dog gets tonight's entree."
My husband looked at me innocently, and asked "So, did you do anything today?"
It's a good thing that most of my appendages were otherwise engaged, as I was unable to jump up and throttle him to death. This was probably for the best, as I assume that asking a stupid question is not grounds for murder in this country. Let me back up a bit, and explain what led me to this point in my life.
I was not always bordering on the brink of insanity. On the contrary, a mere four years ago, I had a good job, steady income, and a vehicle that could NOT seat a professional sports team, and me, comfortably. I watched television shows that were not hosted by singing puppets. I went to bed later than nine o'clock at night.
I preferred sex to sleeping in. I laughed at those people who drove halfway across the country hauling a tent trailer, three screaming kids, a drooling dog, and called it a holiday.
Now I have become one of them! What happened? The stick turned blue. I have traded in my Victoria's Secrets lingerie for cotton briefs and a firm support-nursing bra. Good-bye, Garth Brooks. Hello, Sharon, Lois and Bram. My idea of privacy is getting to use the bathroom without a two-year old banging on the door, and the baby spinning the toilet paper roll from my lap. And I finally understand that the term "Stay-At-Home Mom" does not refer to a parent, who no longer works outside the house, but rather to one who never seems to get out the front door.
So here I sit, children in hand, wondering how to answer my beloved husband.
DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY? Well, I think I did, although not much seems to have gotten accomplished. I shared breakfast in bed with a handsome young man. Of course, the breakfast consisted of a bowl of porridge and leftover cookie crumbs found between the sheets. The handsome young man is about thirty-four inches tall and only gets really excited at the sight of purple dinosaurs, toy trucks and French Fries. I got to take a relaxing stroll in the woods. Of course, I was on the lookout for frogs and lizards, and had to stop and smell the dandelions along the way. I successfully washed one load of laundry, moved the load that was in the washer into the dryer, and the dryer load into the basket. The load that was in the basket is now spread out on the bed, awaiting my bedtime decision to actually put the clothes away or merely move them to the top of the dresser. I read two or three classics. Of course, Dickens and Shakespeare cannot take credit for these works, as we have moved on to the works of Seuss and Munsch. I don't think I will be making any trips to the Adult Section of my local library anytime soon. In between, I dusted, wiped, organized and rearranged. I kissed away the owies and washed away the tears. I scolded, praised, hugged, and tested my patience, all before noon. DID I DO ANYTHING TODAY? You betcha!
I will now understand what people mean when they say that parenthood is the hardest job they will ever have. In my LBD (life before diapers) I was able to teach young minds how to divide fractions and write complex sentences, but I am unable to teach a strong willed two-year-old how to use the toilet. I was once able to navigate urban streets while talking on the car phone and looking for a decent radio station, but now I can't get the wheels on my stroller to all go in the same direction. I've graduated from university, written newspaper articles, and won awards, but can't figure out how to get carrot stains out of the carpet. I used to debate with my friends about politics, but now we discuss the merits of cloth versus disposables. And when did I stop talking in sentences that had more than five words. So, in response to my husband's inquiry, yes, I did do something today. In fact, I am one step closer to one of life's greatest accomplishments.
No, I did not cure AIDS or forge World Peace, but I did hold a miracle in my arms, two in fact. My children are my great accomplishment, and the opportunity to raise them is my greatest challenge. I don't know if my children will grow up to be great leaders or world-class brain surgeons. Frankly, I don't care, as long as they grow up to be happy and fulfilled. They are my greatest joys, even though I sometimes cry myself to sleep at night in frustration.
The point is, that today I got to watch my children take another step on the great journey of Life, and I even got to point out some of the sites along the way. As challenging as parenthood is, it is also equally rewarding, because we are using all our wisdom, our talent and skills to help forge a new person. It is this person (these people), who in turn, will use their gifts to create our future. So every nursery rhyme I recite, every swing I push, every little hand I hold is SOMETHING!
And I did it today.
AUTHOR UNKNOWN
Wow, Trina! Thanks for posting this!
Ame
I remember it being hard, when Emily was born. Sarah was 2-1/2 and not in school yet, but was starting to give up naps! So, I couldn't always sleep, when Emily was sleeping. I remember being soooo tired.
It does eventually settle down. My kids took turns waking up at night, for a while, but I think by the time Emily was about 4 months old, we were all sleeping better. I think that is when we could go with the flow more easily.
Packing to go somewhere, with a toddler and a baby was an adventure, too, since both of mine were in diapers for a while.
It gets easier, I promise! Before too long, everything will be second nature to you. You may have to relax your cleaning standards a little, but your kids are young ONCE, your *less than perfectly cleaned* house will be there when you can get to it.
Hang in there, Eve! {{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}
You need to have at least three or four more kids so that the older ones can take care of the younger ones! Both my mom (we have nine in our family) and two of my sisters (five and four kids each) said that after three kids life gets easier! Me, I am happy with two. It does get much easier, and soon your kids will be listening to big people music!
Take care (and congrats on the new additon).
That's great, Trina! Eve, yes, thank goodness, it does get better! The second is so much harder than the first. It feels like someone took your life, turned it upside-down, and shook as hard as they could! I agree with Dawn...when the baby's 3 or 4 months old, things settle down. You never really get back to "normal," but you get to your "new normal!" IMO, you are at the most difficult stage. Yes, every age brings it's own challenges,(my dd is learning to drive...yikes!!) but at least you can get some sleep, for heaven's sakes! Everything seems overwhelming when you're exhausted. Hang in there, and try to enjoy as much of it as you can. They're not babies for very long. (Thank God!)
It's funny, for me the second one was a breeze compared to the first! With the first I had no frame of reference and no hope that my life would ever be my own again!
It was much harder to go from none to one than from one to two, but mine are a nice distance apart, my son was 2 years and 9 months when my daughter was born, so I was still in the routine of diapers and such, but he was old enough to amuse himself and help me out a little, too.
Enjoy them!
Ame
Ame- I was the same way!! When Natalie was born I thought my whole life had just come to a complete stop and would never be the same again. I'm not planning on more children, but if we did, I think going from 1 to 2 would be much easier for me than going from childless to 1.
The first 2 months with Sarah were an adventure. She cried so much, at night! I got very little sleep. Then, at 8 weeks, the little angel started sleeping through the night and EVERY NIGHT after that! Emily was more hit and miss, but Sarah slept through the night and that was it! So, by 3 months, she was sleeping from 7pm to 7am and it was soooo easy.
During Emily's hit and miss sleeping, Sarah did have a short bout with night terrors, that woke her up, on the nights that Emily slept! So, going from 1 to 2, was harder for me!
I also remember a night that I heard Emily cry to get up and eat and I didn't want to get up, so I didn't right away. Then I couldn't remember if I had gotten up or not! LOL! I must have gone back to sleep. Well, a baby who is hungry isn't quiet for long. I was soon paged again and got up then!
Eventually, they were both sleeping all night and it got easier, again, though.
YES!!! It get's easier. The first 6 months with a newborn were always pretty hard on me. Didnt seem to matter if it was baby #1, 2 or 3. Lack of sleep night after night really drags me down. Even when the baby did nap I didnt feel like cleaning, I was too tired. lol
I also went thru being a human pacifier and that got old. lol
You should hire a cleaning service for a year. Then relax and enjoy that baby and Syd.
They grow soooo fast. This first yr will go by in a blur! We have been looking at all of BLake's baby clothes and tiny shoes and socks. Oh myyy goodness, I forgot that he was ever that little. Makes me sad. He is getting too big!
Your ds is precious, btw! Pic's were great!
I've got to ditto Conni. I was exhausted when my dks were infants, no matter which one it was. I was the human pacifier and I can't figure out how I managed to accomplish what few things did get done each day. Like Enchens, I would prioritize what ONE thing I had to do that day. If we were running out of dishes to eat from, then dishes got done. If one of the kids was wearing their last pair of clean undies, I made sure to wash a load of whites. The bare minimum got done and every other ounce of energy went to our family. Good luck, Eve. It gets better...Promise!!
Hey Eve, I know how hard it is. Cameron is 4 months and last night I nursed him at 10:30, 12:00, 3:00 and 5 am.
I try to do things in little bits. Today I washed all the laundry, tomorrow I will fold it and maybe the next day it will get put away. If I had to get it all done in one day, well it just wouldn't get done. We also make more of an effort to keep the house tidy that way there are no big clean-ups to do. Every night after I give Cameron his bath I take an old towel and just wipe everyting down in the bathroom and it keeps it looking cleaner longer.
If you can afford it hire a cleaning service, even if they just do the bathrooms and clean the floors for awhile. My mom also came when Cameron was born and cooked for 3 weeks and filled the freezer, this was a huge help. We only had to shop for the basics and didn't have to cook for well over a month.
If your back is sore from nursing, practice nursing laying down, it's a huge help especially for night time feedings when you are most tired. I would also say that you are probably leaning over too much. Make sure you are really comfortable before latching him on and bring him to you, don't hunch over to nurse him. Put some extra pillows under him if you have to.
It gets better, but it takes time. Hang in there.
I remember nursing Sarah at midnight, 2, 4 and 6. It was sometime in the first 2 months. Ugh.
Thanks everyone. I try to not worry too much about the house, but when I am sitting in it all day, it's stressful for me if it's too dirty. I don't mind a little mess. We didn't see to it that DD's room got picked up for a month! You coudln't even see the floor! So, I really am trying to prioritize. Also, Mason is now routinely taking a long nap in the afternoon, so it gives me a chance to swap the laundry and do the dishes, and check my email. It's been nice to actually get something done!
And I cooked last night! Shocking!
LOL, Tink. I have to laugh. I keep checking DD's underwear drawer to see how we are doing. Or else it's the nursing pads--I have a ton of them too, but I never seem to have enough. LOL
Ahhh! Gotta love that nursing schedule! LOL Mason ate at 10:30pm and woke at 4,5,6 and now he's ready to eat again. Yes, I did bring him to bed at 4,so that made it easier. That's actually what hurts my back. I lie there and don't move and it's uncomfortable!
Now, I have a sick DD! It should be interesting!
Thanks for the tips.
I try to keep to a schedule. I finally have all three of my kids (9yrs, 19 months, and 8 months) on about the same schedule. I also found that once everyone was sleeping through the night (a big event) is when I was able to get some decent sleep. Every once in awhile I find myself taking a nap along with the babies.
P.S. When my second child was born I felt like a new mom because it had been such a long time since I went through the newborn thing so don't feel bad. It's amazing how much a person can function with such little sleep.
1 to 2 KICKED MY BUTT! I have a friend with 7 children and she even says the same. I am on # 4 and haven't a fearful bone in my body. I figure after the transition from 1 to 2, I can do anything!
Hang in there. Pretty soon, you'll be saying 2 is better than one. They'll will begin playing together before you know it!
I have a friend with 7 children, too, but they range in age from almost 5 months old, up to about 20. So, she has lots of people to help with olders and youngers.
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