Is it just the age?
Moms View Message Board: Parenting Discussion: Archive July-December 2005:
Is it just the age?
Connor is 14 months and SCREAMS at the top of his lungs if I don't let him do certain things like pick up icky things on the sidewalk or walk in a certain place. I let him cry it out, throw a fit, distract him and ignore it...but it's so tiring. And, he'll even try to hit my face when he's mad and I'm holding him.
Should I just keep ignoring it? Should I tell him "no"? I almost think he's doing it for attention. (The hitting.)
Also...sometimes it's funny and I laugh because the face he gives me is *so* pitiful...although, I think it makes him more angry. LOL 
Just ignore and if he tried hitting just put him on the floor and walk away. Pretty typical behavior at this age.
We are so in the midst of all of that right now. Throwing food, hitting, screaming, laying down on the ground he will even bang his head on purpose. Everyone says ignore it but it's hard. The other day we had people over for dinner and he threw a handfull of food right at me. I lost it and scared everyone at the table with one loud "ENOUGH!"
Nothing seems to work, it's really hard right now cause I'm so tired and out of patience, but you just have to remind yourself that this behaviour won't last forever.
He's also going through "pacifier withdrawals".
When he does something inappropriate, go get his blankie and tell him to hold it, while you carry him to a quiet place on the couch, bed, floor, etc.
Tell him that what he did was not nice to mommy and he can have some lovey time with his blankie.
This will reinforce his new comfort item, distract him from the initial area; while telling him what he did was not what you expect.
Hang in there....and try not to smile at his adorable face!
Taylor is doing the same thing. I just let her scream and throw her fit. She will do it for a few seconds then see something nteresting anf it's over.
When she tries to hit me a grab her hand look her in the eyes and tell her NO in a very strong voice. She has also tried to bite me, I don't remember DS doing that one.
It is a phase and if you continue to do what you are doing it should pass in no time.
Ditto Andi. Natalie has her moments, although I think about a month ago was her worst so far. We ignore and let her cry it out. When she has hit me I get in her face in a strong voice and say "No, You don't hit mommy" and then put her down. After our month deal with this she seems to realize that her crying doesn't get her anywhere. BUT...I've noticed that wanting to go outside and not being able to has really ticked her off the last few days, so we've been listening to screaming a bit more! We just try to distract her.
Do you use the book "What to expect the toddler years"? Although I don't take everything it says to heart, I love to use it as a reference and a guideline so I know when things are "normal for the age". I highly recommend it. Natalie has been very clingy to me lately and according to her age, that book says it's totally normal so it makes me feel better!
Deanna, I think I do have that book. I just need to find it. After our move, we still have certain things in boxes.
Thanks everyone...and yes, Annie, you're right. He's still weaning off the paci so things should be getting better.
He's sick today though. Got a slight bit of a cold.
Definately say no but really try to keep a calm poker face and don't get mad yourself. I remember my daughter would go off the deep end and I could almost see the corner of her mouth tip up into a smile when I started to lose my patience. If he's really angry and not looking for your entertaining outbursts then what worked with my son was the same calm no but also saying that I understood he was frustrated and angry but no. What was best was when I somehow had the patience of an angel, led or carried them to their room, let them know, in a quiet, caring voice, thatI thought they were awfully upset and needed some special time just to themselves so they could calm down and think clearly and gave them some toys to play with on their bed. That worked great (when I had that patience) and I've noticed that my kids will now often take themselves to their rooms when something is starting to tick them off and then come back with a clearer head to talk about it.
I got hit and was tempted to, you know, put my foot down and drag the kids to their room (more than tempted really. I know I did drag them there at times) or something but again, if I just said no and didn't give it any more consideration then their screaming they tended to drop that.
Hitting a parent and getting what you want is best.
Hitting them and getting a big show and fireworks isn't so good but at least it's a fun show.
Hitting them and getting absolutely no special reaction is just dissapointing and ineffective.
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