We need help, our 4yr old gs won't give up his thumb. We have tried to tell him it taste NASTY but he says No it taste like watermelon. I have tried sucking on his thumb but he says wipe it off.
He has only been doing it for about a year. How do we stop it? He started preschool 2wks ago so MAYBE that will help as he sees hes the ONLY one doing it.
His parents don't know how to STOP it!!
Our kids NEVER sucked on their thumbs.. it was ALWAYS a "passie" that you can throw away BUT a thumb you CAN NOT.

By Trina~moderator on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 02:45 pm:

You're not going to like what I have to say. LOL! JMHO, but if you continue to make a big deal out of it, the more attractive your GS's thumb will become to him. I know because I have been there personally. *I* was a thumbsucker and my parents tried EVERYTHING to get me to stop. Thumb sucking was a source of comfort to me, and when my parents made a BIG issue out of it, I was stressed and needed/wanted that thumb MORE. They finally threw in the towel and I gave it up *on my own* in Kindergarten. My teeth are FINE. I never needed braces.

My DS was a finger sucker until he was 6 yrs. old. It was definitely a source of comfort as he only did it when tired, sick or frightened. We never made a big deal out it, but as he got older we gently reminded him that it could effect his teeth. No nagging, no humiliation or punishments. Gradually the finger sucking subsided until one day he proudly announced, "Hey, I don't need to suck my fingers anymore!" His teeth are fine as well.

A good article:
When should my child stop sucking her thumb?

By Kernkate on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 03:18 pm:

DD is almost 5 and still sucks her thumb. Not all the time but when she is bored, tired or mad. She started Pre-K this year and told us she never sucks her thumb at school.
Everyone including the Dr. has told me the more I harp the more she will do it. So I am trying my hardest not to tell her so I will see what happens.
Good luck I Do know how frustrating it is!

By Boxzgrl on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 03:37 pm:

My sister is 19 and we'll occasionally catch her putting her thumb to her mouth. It's weird. I agree to let him wean himself though.

By Dawnk777 on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 08:21 pm:

I can't be one to talk. Emily sucked her thumb into grade school. Then finally not at school. Then finally not at all. She was pretty old.

By Mommmie on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 09:08 pm:

My 5th grader still sucks his thumb (discreetly). Good luck getting your GS to stop!

By Ginny~moderator on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 10:17 pm:

Why do you want him to stop. From my reading, most child experts say let him be - he'll stop when he's ready.

Do you want him to stop because it's bad for him? It's not. For most children it is a source of comfort at tired or difficult times.

Do you want him to stop because it's bad for his teeth? The pediatric dentist I took my then 4 year old son to said if he's sucking his thumb it is because it provides something he needs. If he's still doing it when his permanent teeth start to come in, we'll provide a guard so that his teeth don't get out of shape. So that's not a good reason either.

Do you want him to stop because other people are saying "he's too old to do that, you should break him of it"? Bad reason.

I think you're going to find most of the moms here will say let him be, he'll stop when he's ready. In the meantime, there are much worse habits - he could, for example, be a hair puller and have bald patches on his head, or a nailbiter - a really, really hard habit to break and a harmful one.

And, respectfully, he's your grandson, not your son. Do his parents want him to stop - enough to seek advice about it? If his parents were asking for advice, I'd give the same advice - and to his grandmom, I'd say, as respectfully as possible, while I understand your concern, it is really not your place or your problem. Times have changed and medical/child psychological thinking about thumb or finger sucking has changed - for the better, to my mind. As a soon to be grandmother, I hope I feel the same way with my grandchild/ren when the question arises. But I am confident that my son and dear dil won't think twice about just leaving it alone.

I obviously have fairly strong feelings about this. I was a finger sucker, and stopped - on my own. All three of my sons were thumb suckers - and they stopped on their own. None of them graduated from 8th grade still sucking their thumbs. I remember being at the Flower Show with my then 2-3 year old middle child in the stroller, when this man walked up to us, reached down and took my son's thumb out of his mouth, and said "he's too old to do that"! My reaction was - get your hands off my son and if I want your advice I'll ask for it! And I was pretty loud.

By Cat on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 11:24 pm:

My oldest sucked his thumb until he was 9, and then he finally decided he wanted to quit and asked my advise on how to do that. Even his dentist said there was no use in making a big deal out of it. He mostly did it while sleeping, so he didn't really know he was doing it anyway. The dentist also said there was no use getting a device installed (like a retainer that pokes the thumb to remind them not to suck) because if he wasn't ready to stop he'd find a way to suck it anyway. So to ditto the advise of the others, don't make a big deal of it and he'll stop when he's ready.

Btw, the way he finally stopped was to wear batting gloves to bed. He quit in three nights.

By My3cuties on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 01:41 am:

My BIL sucks his thumb and he is 24 years old. He has very pretty teeth...no harm done there. He does it when he is going to sleep or sitting around the house, playing games or whatever, but not out in public. I agree to let him get rid of the habit on his own, but it may be a while before he is willing to give it up. Also I wouldn't necessarily say that he will be the only one doing it in his preschool. And drawing attention to his thumb as being "nasty" might not be a good idea, just my opinion though, as in it might make him do it even more by feeling self-conscious.

To me it is just a habit, like twirling hair or biting nails. Eventually we all grow out of things. I was a bad nail biter but I quit..sure I was 20 but I did quit. Occasionally if I get stressed about something I find myself biting again, but not like I used to. Things will work out, I wouldn't stress too much over it.

By Tklinreston on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 10:59 am:

Trina you took the words right out of my mouth. My ds who will be 6 soon still sucks his thumb but mainly when he is very tired and needs comfort and for relaxation while watching tv. I never knew from reading the posts that so many other kids sucked their thumb and it's comforting to me that other moms agree with my position on it, which is basically not to make a big deal and never make him feel humiliated about it. As he grows older I have noticed the sharp decline in frequency and I'm confident that soon he will learn on his own how to withdraw completely from it. What may be peculiar about Josh though is that instead of a security blanket or stuffed toy during bedtime, he has to hold onto one of my bras. This started as a baby and still continues, although, he is learning to let it go slowly. Frankly, our kids grow soooo fast, that I just try to cherish everything about them...

By Dawnk777 on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 02:16 pm:

Emily still holds her L hand, up by her mouth, but her thumb never goes in. Mostly, when she is deep in thought, or concentrating on something.