I have a question...
Lauren is only 9 days old so I know she is not going to be on any kind of schedule, but I don't really know how many more nights I can go with 3 hours of sleep...lol

It is not like I am frustrated because when she is awake I love to be with her, but last night I was sitting in a chair and I dozed off and she slid down my shoulder. I woke up instantly, but I feel horrible about it!

Anyway, here is the thing...she will go to sleep at around 9:30 at night and then wake up at 11:30 to eat and go right back to sleep, but it never fails that around 2:30 a.m. she will wake up and wants to eat until around 4:30 or 5 a.m. then almost like she is programmed with the clock she will go to sleep until around 8. Is that normal for her to want to eat so much during that time frame??? When she is barely sucking is she getting anything?? It seems like she just wants to use me as a pacifier, but will not take a real pacifier. I have tried the side lying position to feed her at that time so I can rest but she tends to doze off and then wake up and doze off and wake up so it drags it out longer.

Also how can I keep her awake so she eats until she is full, she falls asleep in the middle of eating and I burp her and then put her down and she wakes right up and eats again. I have tried tickling her feet and rubbing her head while she is nursing but I think she likes it. Thanks alot for any help with this.

By Kate on Wednesday, June 1, 2005 - 12:31 pm:

She's not nursing that whole time between 2:30 and 5:00. She is grazing here and there and using you as a pacifier. So no, she's not getting anything when she's barely sucking. I guess if I were you I'd feed her about 15-20 minutes per side at that point, and then lay her back down or walk around the house with her or rock her until she's back to sleep. Just get her out of the habit of grazing/sucking/feeding for a 2.5 hour block. She's too little to just lay there and cry, so I would definitely hold and rock her or walk her until she's asleep again. Or use the swing. But I think the key is definitely to break the 2.5 hour habit of sucking. Maybe in time she'll take to the pacifier, or maybe she'll take to it easier if you're holding/rocking/walking/swinging her at the same time.

As for keeping her awake long enough to really get a good meal...that's hard at this age!! I think she just needs time. Yes, removing her socks, tickling her, etc. is supposed to work, but it never did for me!

Good luck...the lack of sleep is brutal. BTW, she's beautiful!! I saw your pics!

By Reds9298 on Wednesday, June 1, 2005 - 12:36 pm:

Okay, I'm a formula feeder, but at 9 days old mine was doing the same thing, only *really* eating around 2:30. She was a 3hr. girl for a long time AND it was very hard to keep her awake for a full meal...nearly impossible.

I think it's normal at this age, so if she just wants to use you as a paci, that's good that she doesn't really need/want to pig out at that time!
The lack of sleep is so hard, btdt!

By Clarabel on Wednesday, June 1, 2005 - 01:20 pm:

Oh I remember this and I can't believe I'm about to do it again.What did I do? I would give him a good twenty min on each side and then he would sleep and wake up two hours later and I would do it again. There were those times in the beginning that he wanted to just pacify and suck and then there are those times when they need to keep sucking to really get your milk production up to what they need. It's also newborn bonding.
We were co-sleeping too so he would smell me and get stimulated to nurse all night.He never had a pacifier. I don't know how I am going to do it this time. I like what Kate said about breaking the 2.5 hour grazing time.Maybe try the pacifier in a week or so, or have dh give it to her.It is hard when they are on you and want the real thing.

By Clarabel on Wednesday, June 1, 2005 - 01:22 pm:

Hey where are those pics?
I'll check your profile.

By Dawnk777 on Wednesday, June 1, 2005 - 02:44 pm:

I remember nursing my older one a lot during the night. I know one night in particular, she nursed at midnight, 2, 4, and 6. It was sometime in those first few weeks, I think. She didn't regain her birthweight in 2 weeks, but then gained over a pound the third week, so was over her birthweight, by that point.

By Kaye on Wednesday, June 1, 2005 - 03:59 pm:

It didn't take me too long to figure out how to lay there and sleep while the baby nursed for that reason alone!

Okay first you have to think a little differently. What would you do with a bottle fed baby? Would you offer a bottle constantly for 2 hours? Nope you would find something else. So just because it is there, doesn't mean it is time to eat. You need to find a way to soothe her. She should be eating at least every 3 hours, don't try to go longer yet.

The other thing is there is a guideline on how long to feed. I think it is 20 minutes each side. It will hurt you if you just let her suck all day

What you may need to try to do (i know tough with other kids and dad gone) is try to go to sleep when she is. This will make those long nights not so bad. Ignore the house, order out..LOL Save the mess for dad when he is home. I also thing right when you get it figured out (at about a month) they go through a growth spurt where they need more again.

By Frasersmama on Wednesday, June 1, 2005 - 04:50 pm:

Welcome to the wonderful world of the newborn. What she is doing is called non-nutritive sucking and is very important for her development as well as giving her a sense of comfort. It is unbelievably hard on Mom, but it doesn't last forever. Nap when you can, the housework can wait My dd nursed every 3 hours around the clock for 9 months! There is a light at the end of the tunnel, and no, it's not a train.

By Lauram on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 03:19 pm:

Personally, I would put her in the bed with you so you can doze while she nurses.

By Heaventree on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 04:59 pm:

I nursed on demand. Matt woke like clock work every two hours. In the beginning I would nurse 20 mins. on each side. It took me and he awhile to master laying on the side nursing but this is what worked best for me. He nursed every two hours on demand for months - sorry Candis. It was hard but I got used it to after awhile. I also didn't have any other children to care for during the day so I could sleep when he slept. Remember with time she will become a more efficient feeder, 40 mins. of nursing will eventually turn into 10.

Every baby is different, if you can manage sleeping with her safely that would be my best advice. I really don't think at this age she is using you as a pacifier in an inappropriate way if she were 3 or 4 months old then I would say yes and you need to find an alternative. This is special bonding time for her. Hang in there kiddo, I know it's hard.

By My2cuties on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 05:48 pm:

Thanks everyone! Last night was sooo much better! She stayed up more during the day yesterday and so she slept more at night. I fed her at 12 and went to sleep then. She woke up at 3:30 and at 7 to nurse and then at 9 and has been every 2 hours so far.

Another Question though... Is it okay for her to nurse on one breast at a feeding and the other at the next feeding??? because sometimes she will nurse both at a feeding and sometimes she will only nurse one and go to sleep no matter what I do to wake her up.

By My2girlygirls on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 06:02 pm:

My kids always nursed only on one side per feeding. In the beginning I would try and have them nurse on both but I gave up after a while and realized that one was enough for them. Mine became really fast and would nurse for 10 minutes and then back to sleep. My sister used to put a safety pin on her bra on the side they last nursed on so in the middle of the night she would know without much thought which side to start on. Hers would nurse like 10 minutes on one side and then just 5 on the other so she would start on the least nursed side. She used to laugh and say that she should be able to feel which side was more full and know which side to nurse on but in the middle of the night you are trying your best to not wake up and think...

By Heaventree on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 06:53 pm:

Yes, Candis it's fine to nurse on just one breast at a time, just try to remember which one you did last, it's sometimes hard when your sleep deprived. If you mess up and do the same breast twice your body will remind with an engorged breast. Och!

I just to switch my ring to the other hand to help me remember or wear an elastic band on my wrist, but I often forgot to switch those as well.

By Kaye on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 06:53 pm:

That is just fine. It is actually preferable than just snacking on both sides. It takes time to get past the foremilk and to the hindmilk. The foremilk has a lot more water in it, the hindmilk has a lot more fat and nutrients, so longer feedings on one breast just get more in her.

Is this your first one to breastfeed? My third child was my first real breastfeeding experience, I thought I was a little different in that!

By My2cuties on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 07:17 pm:

I tried with both girls but not hard enough. I want to make sure I do this right this time. I nursed Katelyn for 2 months and Hailey for 2 weeks (the doctor had me all upset because she had not gained back to her birthweight yet but that is a whole other story, I wish I would have kept it up) So I am hoping to nurse her to the first year or at least as long as possible.

By Kaye on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 08:36 pm:

Good for you! I also tried (but not hard enough) with my first. Didn't even think about it with my second. But it became very important to me with number three. I did a lot of research, read lots of books and took several classes.

There is a great book called "so that's what they're for" that I used as a guide when I had questions. There is some stuff in there that was a little too much for me, but it really had great advice when I had an issue.

I made it 6-7 months, I am very happy that we did it. Good luck and keep posting questions when you have them!

By Emdee on Thursday, June 2, 2005 - 09:42 pm:

my dd is now almost 4 months old and I am exclusively breastfeeding her as well. Keep in mind that they go through growth spurts and will nurse more during those times. I really don't know the times, but someone told me the other day that around 9-10 days old they have one so that could explain her up all night. By the way, I breastfed dd#1 until 13 months or so and still am asking people questions all the time about nursing this time around. I think it is hard for so many reasons, but it is so worth it if you have the opportunity to do it, so good luck and stick with it if this is what you want. My dd is having a really hard time with nursing and if I wasn't so committed to it, I probably would have already given up (dd#1 didn't ever have problems with nursing so this is quite different this time around).