Faith will be 4 yrs old in August. I remember posting so much about her horrible sleep habits. How when she was a baby, and even up to two yrs old, she was not sleeping through the night. I got so much advice about letting her cry it out.We sort of tried that, but I couldnt handle it, plus that is when she started climbing out of her crib, when I wasnt coming to her..So for over two yrs we got use to her waking up, sometimes she was up for 2-3 hrs at a time. People told me I was wrong to hold her and rock her before bedtime, that she didn't know how to fall asleep on her own. I honestly believed that for the most part, but I just couldnt let her cry.
For about 1 1/2 yrs now, Faith sleeps all night every night, never gets up(Well except when she was sick and throwing up in her bed, LOL)
Up until about 4 months ago, I would still hold in bed with me until she fell asleep. Now though, I still hold her in bed with me, and sometimes we watch a quick show on tv together, and I say "ok, time to go in your bed now", and you know what, she walks there willingly.
We have little rituals we do before bed, we sing one song, we pray and then I take her worries away..I put my hand on the side of her forehead and tell her to put all her worries in there. She tells me when she is done, then I throw them away. I then kiss my hand and rub the same spot and tell her I am now putting in happy thoughts and love, and she smiles and closes her eyes.

My point to all this, when I was going through those sleepless night, I honestly felt like a zombie.It was hard, and tiring, and frustrating...
Now at almost 4 yrs old, she is a new child at bedtime. I trusted my heart and never forced the cry it out, it was too hard on all of us. I am proud of the fact that she can go to bed on her own.
I will admit though I let her nap in my bed, while I watch "All my Children"...She sleeps right through it

By Dramamamma on Friday, May 16, 2008 - 09:21 am:

That is wonderful Jackie, sometimes you have to go with your heart and looks like in the long run it paid off for you.

Don't blame her on the sleeping through AMC, I used to watch it but now couldn't sit through it if I tried! lol....

By Luvn29 on Friday, May 16, 2008 - 12:07 pm:

Jackie, I went through those same things with my dd, and never could let her cry. We manage, and eventually, it all gets better! I don't think you can ever go wrong holding your child and giving them love.

And as long as she is napping, I don't think it matters where! At least mom's getting a much deserved break!

By Nicki on Friday, May 16, 2008 - 05:22 pm:

Jackie, I've done much the same with our dd who is five. I've had the same success with bedtime! She now sleeps through the night unless she is sick. We never had the problem of her leaving her bed or room at night either. I have always gone to her at night. I have given her the option of sleeping with dh and I when she's ill, but she always chooses her own bed. She just feels better in her own "space".:-) I still rock her or sit on her bed and rub her back until she falls asleep. My dd has some sensory issues, and I was told by the therapist that it's helpful to help her settle in this manner. So I am glad I listened to my heart.

I'm happy for you and your daughter.:-) My dd usually shares her thoughts with me at this time of the day. It's become our special time. I love your ritual of taking your dd's worries away! Lara and I try to talk about happy things that happened during the day and I tell her how much I enjoyed being with her doing our favorite things. I even look forward to the down time with her. It helps us both unwind!

By Dawnk777 on Friday, May 16, 2008 - 05:55 pm:

I'm glad it has finally gotten better and that you did it in a way that was comfortable for you. I was never much good at "cry-it-out", either. A few times, Sarah had a really good reason for crying!

One time she'd tried to slide out of her crib, on her stomach and got stuck. Another time she'd throw up.

By Jackie on Friday, May 16, 2008 - 06:06 pm:

I know people truly believe in the cry it out method. I believe you have to do what works for your family. I just never had the heart to let her cry it out. As soon as I would pick her up and snuggle her she would stop. I figured what is wrong when a baby/small child just wants mommy to be close????
It all worked out in the end.

By Tayjar on Monday, May 19, 2008 - 11:35 am:

I never did the cry it out method either. I did what you did. I think it makes a more secure child if you just repond with love when they are crying. I still cuddle up with my now almost 12 y/o dd at bedtime and hubby snuggles with DS 10 y/o. We talk about all kinds of stuff. I believe that stage was set during the early years when we developed bedtime and naptime as a special time.

By Annie2 on Tuesday, May 20, 2008 - 10:18 am:

I tried the crying it out with one of my dds. Two nights of guilt and rethinking what I had started. The third am when I went to her room to wake her up she had fallen asleep at her door and her little fingers were sticking out from under it. That was enough for me.
more kids, more sleep issues...I used to hop from bed to bed and actually had a travel alarm clock that I carried with me. My first dd has never had sleep issues but the other three did.
Now fast forward they all put themselves to bed at bedtime. Of course I have the occasional child or kids in bed with me by the am but they are my "little kittens" and I know when they all stop needing me at night it will be a bittersweet moment.

By Amecmom on Tuesday, May 20, 2008 - 09:37 pm:

Jackie, your post made me cry. I love how you "take her worries away". I remember your posts. I ws going through the same thing at the same time with my little one. I even went the meds route to help her sleep. I am so glad you have found success traveling a road that you are happy with. It's never easy.
My little one still has not found her good sleep.
Ame

By Jackie on Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - 09:00 am:

Ame, I do remember you posting similiar sleep problems. We did the med route to for a bit. We used Benadryl on advice of her doctor. The dr had suggested to do it for 2 weeks at a time to get her in a good sleep pattern. We did it on and off for probably close to 6 months. My husband wanted to do it longer, but I said no as I didn't want her to be dependent on that.

Sorry your little one has not found her good sleep? Is she getting up every night or just once in awhile?

Believe me when I say I know how it is like. I felt like I was living in a fog the first 2 yrs of her life with lack of sleep. I feel so much better that we are all sleeping better now.

Now if I can get her potty trained..thats a different story..She is about 95%...she is just a stubborn and spoiled little girl