Bed wetting
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I am going anon because it would mortify my child if I didn't.
Has anyone dealt with an older child still wetting the bed? My child is almost 11 and still has night time accidents almost every night. He sleeps right through it and discovers it when he wakes up in the morning.
He is now under the care of a urologist. My guess is that he is a heavy sleeper and eventually he really will outgrow it. But we have an ultrasound scheduled to make sure there is nothing internal going on, just in case.
Any tips for getting through all of this? He is so embarrassed. He can't do sleepovers with friends or sleep away camps out of fear it will happen.
Right now I am waking him up every night to get him to go to the bathroom. But so far, we still have had little success. There is no pattern to when it happens. One night I had him up at 11:30 and again at 2:00, and he still had an accident. Last night I woke him at 1:00 and it had already happened. We've also tried the buzzer alarm that goes off when the sensor gets wet, and that didn't work. I have him on a homeopathic remedy right now ("Be Dry") and we are seeing no effect from that. We limit his fluid intake in the evenings. I am literally at a loss as to what else to do. My heart just aches for him.
Any other BTDT advice?? We'll try almost anything at this point. Thanks.
The doctor can give him a pill that keeps him from wetting the bed. Our doctor told us that we could have a prescription just to give him when he was going to a sleepover or having a friend over so he wouldn't have to worry. At the time he wouldn't stay away from home, but the dr. wanted us to know the option was there. You might want to check into that.
I definitely feel you are doing the right thing by taking him to a urologist just in case. And if it is just something he needs to outgrow, at least the pills would help him with his pride and self esteem.
By the way, I used them when I was little. As long as I took my pill before bedtime, I never had an accident!
Poor kid! Sounds like you're doing everything possible to remedy the situation. No personal experience at that age, but have you tried Good Nights? No, they won't solve the problem but at least will make clean up easier in the mean time. They even have ones that look like boxer shorts now, so they're not so obvious.
{{{HUGS}}} to your son!
Thank you for that. Yes, we did discuss the possibility of the pill for short term fixes. He has another appointment early in June and we will probably get that since he has a camp he really wants to go to this summer. I am so happy to hear that it worked for you, since my son is worried about being away at camp and the pill not working. But, as you know, that's just a quick fix, not a solution, and I really want to help him get past this.
Thank you for that suggestion. It helps give some assurance that it's something we can work through privately, and he won't have to keep missing out on the stuff he wants to do.
Thanks Trina. We have not used Good Nights. I stopped putting him in pull-ups when he was about 3.5 because he has sensitive skin, and he was breaking out in rashes from them. So I've just been doing a lot of laundry over the years. I don't know if he would be open to trying them, or if putting on something that felt like a diaper would only make him feel worse. I may bring it up with him and see what he things. Thanks.
Oh, the poor kid. I hope the doctor is able to help him.
I was a bedwetter, before there were pills.  I, too, could never spend the night at friends' houses or go on overnight camps. I eventually outgrew wetting the bed every night(I was around 13), but to this day I am on Detrol for an over-active bladder. My bladder goes into spasms like it is super-full when it's not. Embarrassingly, I've even had accidents at night as an adult. I was so afraid my dks would have the problem, but, thankfully, neither did.
I hope he grows out of it, but at least there are options either way. Thank you for taking him to a urologist and treating it as the medical situation it is. 30 years ago, I was made to feel it was my fault. It can devastate one's self-esteem. (Yes, counselling has helped, LOL!  )
Me too, Colette. Thank you. The doctor has been so kind and gentle with him and letting him know he is not alone and that we will get it figured out. I was very grateful to see how he treated my son.
Thanks Michele. I've tried to not make it an issue through the years. I just do the laundry and we deal with it. But I can see it is getting harder and harder on him, and it is just heartbreaking. I know his self-esteem suffers because of it, and we try so hard to remind him that it's not his fault, it's not a big deal, and that we will get through it together. But as he gets older, it's harder for him to believe it. I just wish I had a magic cure for him to make it go away.
My uncle wet his bed until he was 14.. After seeing many doctors for treatment they discovered that he has allergic to, of all thing, cows milk/dairy. There is a chemical in the milk that his body was reacting to. They cut out the dairy and he stopped wetting the bed. This apparently is a very common, often over looked cause of bed wetting.
I am not saying that Milk is your sons issue. But dairy products (milk, cheese, yogurt, cottage and cream cheese, buttermilk, butter, sodium caseinate and lactate) are the cause of 60% of food allergens. From what I have read children, with this allergy, can drink as little milk as what would be in a bowl of cereal in the morning and wet the bed that night.. Thinking, oh it is morning consumption surely by it will have passed through the system, but apparently that isn't how it works. A bowl of ice cream, cottage cheese at dinner, no fluids for three hours before bed and these kids are still wetting the bed. They also often suffer from chronic ear and sinus infections that seem resistant to medical treatment. Go away and come back. stomach issues. They often snore, mouth breath at night, wake up with snotty/stuffy noses, often complain/appear to be tired, like they aren't getting enough sleep. They can do a simple blood test to rule it out.
I have a nephew that had surgery to remove his adenoids and tonsils to stop his infections, the child walked around with ear aches and snotty nose the majority of the year, he had another infection with in three months of the surgery.. They allergy tested him, turned out he was allergic to cows milk. Switched to soy and he hasn't had an issue in two years.
I don't know what to say, Your DS situation breaks my heart. I honestly think wetting the bed is so heart breaking on a child. My girls are 11 they have a dear friend that wets the bed, her issues are physical (premature bladder), she does sleep over here. But only after her mom and I had a long talk, she was protecting her child and I had to reassure her I was understanding of the situation and that everything would be okay. We both talked to *S*. I explained it would be okay if she had an accident, I took precautions, she wares "pull ups", and my girls don't care. She is their friend and they love her accidents or not nothing is said. They are very lucky to know her, and I know coming here gives her an experience she might not other wise have. Big hugs to you both.. If all else fails, if they don't find anything, have him tested for allergies...
(((((ANON)))))
Oh I meant to mention, a recent study suggests that dairy products, particularly skim milk, may play a role in acne outbreaks.. It also causes skin rashes and sensitivity... It has a whole system affect. It can cause concentration issues, behavior issues, irritability and sleeplessness.
Wow, Bobbie. You just gave me a whole new avenue to explore. I am going to do some more research on this and try eliminating dairy and see what happens. Thank you for giving me something new to try!!!!!
My dd still wets the bed. She is 11 1/2. She has pills that she can take when she wants to spend the night with someone and at her dad's house. She doesn't use them at home because they will not make her outgrow it so we decided she didn't need them at home.
Our routine is when she wakes up after an accident she gets up and cleans herself up (sponge bath or shower) then she takes her bedding and wet clothes and puts them in the washer and starts it. There is no discussion about it. And I put them in the dryer when they are done and She puts them back on her bed when she gets home from school. That has made it easier for her to not have to come down and tell me that she had an accident. (she was so self conciouse about it that she didn't even want to tell me).
Good luck. I know he will grow out of it. It is hard. Just make sure no one ever talks down to him because of it.. like siblings or family members. That really hurts the whole process. I know because my ex did that to my dd.. which is why she takes the pills at his house.
Thanks Tara. I agree with not using the pills at home. It's nice to have the option for nights away, but I'd rather do laundry and try to find ways to solve the problem than masking the problem with medication. Luckily, he is not having issues of anyone in the family talk down to him about this. Dh and dh's dad both went through this as well, so there is nothing but sympathy from them.
Thanks for letting us know we are not alone.
If I were you, I would allow him to try the pills at home before he goes to camp so he can feel secure that they will work. This will make him much more comfortable when he actually goes because he will not be trying them for the first time on his own!
I was a bed wetter until I had my period, so I was 11 or 12. Everyone assumed I was lazy or would outgrow it. I finally went to a urologist for some testing, and I ended up needing some simple surgery. I never had another accident after that surgery.
Oh yes, Adena, we will absolutely do a trial run at home first. I promised him we would, just to be sure it works.
That's really good to know, Marcia. In my heart, I don't *think* we will find a physical problem, but we need to find out for sure. Hopefully, if something does turn up, it will be something easily corrected. Of course, then I will be kicking myself for not finding out sooner!
IF you happen to find something, you can't be kicking yourself because most drs. won't even consider a problem till after they are 10 or 11. They don't want to put them through unnecessary testing if it's just something they will outgrow. I say most, because I am sure there are some out there that will start checking sooner, but the several doctors I know all stated they would wait till around age 10 or 11.
So you are at just the right age to begin checking into things just to be sure!
Thanks Adena. I appreciate that.
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