If you haven't seen this it's pretty funny. We're having a rough weekend (more about that later- if I can find the strength) and a very good friend of mine just sent this to me.

a ) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!

b ) For those who already have children past this age, this is
hilarious.

c ) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.

d ) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.

e ) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.


The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin , Texas


Things I've learned from my Boys (honest and not kidding):
1) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4
inches deep.

2) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
roller blades, they can ignite.

3) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
restaurant.

4) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman
cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread
paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 ft. room.

5) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When
using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times
before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by
a ceiling fan.

7) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too
late.

8) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.

10) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old
Boy.

11) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence

12) Super glue is forever.


13) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't
walk on
water.

14) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15) VCR's do not eject "PB &J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show
they do.

16) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do
not like ovens.

20) The fire department in Austin , TX has a 5-minute response time.

21) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22) It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

25) Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or
without kids.

By Dawnk777 on Sunday, February 6, 2005 - 02:31 pm:

3) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

Yeah, last night, we were out to eat and I could hear the 3 yo's voice better than any other voice in the place!

7) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.

I only have girls and I didn't hear the words, UH_OH, but we did have a problem. DH was always flushing bad food down the toilet. Apparently Emily was paying attention. We were peeling potatoes for our dinner and I picked up an icky one. I threw it in the garbage. Apparently, Emily saw that, too, picked up the potato and tried to flush it down. It went down, but got stuck. We ended up being without a toilet for several days, until the landlord could look at it and then get a plumber in! Fortunately, we had a kind neighbor who let me use her bathroom during the day while she was out delivering phone books and we used the bathroom at McDonald's when we went out for breakfast. I used an ice cream bucket those few nights. (Ugh, I usually have to go in the middle of the night!) It was an adventure! Sure made one appreciate indoor plumbing that works, though! All this time we didn't know there was a potato in the toilet, though. That was reserved for when the plumber took the toilet off the seal and looked underneath. Turned out our wax seal was going to heck, anyway, so he put on a new one. The plumber said a potato wasn't the only thing he'd ever found in a toilet. Sometimes he finds tv remotes! LOL! I'm sure Emily thought she was doing a good thing!