No matter how I try and adjust Helen's feeding and schedule, she cries just at the time I'm getting my son ready for bed. consequently it's impossible to enjoy our nightly routine. Reading a book to him becomes a marathon because I have stop every few pages to try and soothe her. He does not relax the way he should and then has trouble sleeping.

Any suggestions of what I can do with my little just 4 month old volcano?

I may have to resort to propping a bottle, even though it's not time for her to eat.

The stress is really making me snippy.

Oh, and getting help is not an option. My husband works very late.

By Tink on Thursday, January 20, 2005 - 09:48 pm:

Can she be put in a swing or bouncy seat while you read to your ds? Or can your ds do his bedtime routine half an hour earlier and then play quietly until bedtime? My ds had colic and it always started right after dinner and lasted until well past my dd's bedtime. I truly understand how stressful it is. My dh also worked late so I was the only adult. I kept my ds in a sling to keep the crying to a minimum. I'd settle my dd on the couch with a blanket and pace in front of her and read, then show her the pictures before I turned the page. It wasn't ideal but it worked and I only had to do it for about 6 weeks. I hope things ease up soon for you!

By Pixie on Friday, January 21, 2005 - 08:08 am:

As hard as it may be, let her cry. Put her safely in her crib, or other baby device, and you and your DS read elswhere. Crying doesn't hurt them one bit. Your son is adjusting too and many things are changing for him but to me the bedtime routine shouldn't have to. As your DD gets older she will eventually take to that routine as well.

I babysit for a child who is now 6 months. Since I first got him (8 weeks) he has cried from 11-1 in the afternoon. The only two hours that I cannot give him constant attention due to feeding the other children and getting my afternoon kindergartener and nursery schooler ready. Plus the others and have them all ready for the commute. I have no choice I have to let him cry. Even as he gets older and there is more for him to do like the walker and stuff he STILL cries during those hours.

Good Luck, the first year with two is beautiful and difficult at the same time. Two is so much different then one and there is alot of adjusting to be done.

By Colette on Friday, January 21, 2005 - 08:52 am:

I'd try Cori's suggestion. I could never relax and read to one of my children if my 4 month old was screaming in another room. I'd be on edge the whole time. Make sure you make a big deal about what a good big brother your ds is if he has to have his time with you interrupted because of the baby.

By Amecmom on Friday, January 21, 2005 - 08:19 pm:

Well tonight I had help and held little Miss all evening. She even cried when I was holding her. I guess this is just her time.

Ame

By Hlgmom on Friday, January 21, 2005 - 08:29 pm:

My dd cried every night arounf the same time for a couple of hours for the first few months. I would definetely suggest a sling- wearing your baby can have a wonderfully calming effect on them...Also it is certainly easier (and IMO nicer) than letting them cry alone. Even if they are going to cry- They still need your comfort and love! The good news is she did eventually outgrow it! Best of luck with your next night!

By Dawnk777 on Friday, January 21, 2005 - 10:04 pm:

My older daughter cried for 3 hours in the evening, every night starting about 2 weeks old and lasting until she was about 3 months old! Ugh. We just managed to get through it. The only good thing about it was it started from about midnight to 3am in the morning at first and eventually started going from 7-10pm. At the point that she started having the crying jag from 7-10, she started sleeping through the night.

By Audreyj on Saturday, January 22, 2005 - 02:34 pm:

My little niece is a cryer (born Oct. 4) and my sister in law was losing her mind. On a "lark" I found a side to side infant swing on freecycle in great condition. Since it was free, I picked it up for my niece and brought it over to my sister in law. Well, maybe just good luck or something, but my niece loves it and my sister in law has finally gotton some peace and some time for "big sister" (my other niece is 7 years old and was starting to resent the baby). My four month old niece lives in the side to side swing but at least she's not driving everyone in the house nuts anymore....just a suggestion....

AJ

By Mrsheidi on Sunday, January 23, 2005 - 07:40 pm:

Yeah, my ds needed a side-side swing and he used it until he was 6 1/2 months old. He wouldn't relax in a front-back swing for some reason. Does she take a pacifier? Do you think she still needs to be swaddled?
My only advice I guess, is what Audrey said, or Hglmom with the sling idea. Some babies still need the effect of being swaddled or held tightly.

By Amecmom on Monday, January 24, 2005 - 01:03 pm:

She cries with the pacifier in her mouth! Actually, we took her in for her well-baby. It turns out she has labial adhesions and her vaginal area is very irritiated, probably from two courses of antibiotics practically back to back and massive diarhea. It hurts to pee and it hurts afterward because she's so irritated.
We're using estrogen cream to open her up and Aquaphor to protect her skin.

No wonder she screams unless she's being distracted, poor baby!

She's also going through a growth spurt and wants to eat constantly!

With any luck, once she's more comfortable, it will be easier for her sit in her bouncy seat and amuse herself.

Thanks everyone!
Ame