Does anyone have any ideas on kids talking back? It's fine with me if we're joking around and if we tell them to do something they might give a "whatver big daddy" trying to be like Elvis. (don't know where they got that lol)It's getting out of hand. I've tried explaining when it's not ok to be joking around and they need to just do what they are told. It's especially worse in my 7 year old dd, with a close second with 8 yr old ds. Now my 4 yr old is picking up on it with a teenage like tone of voice.

By Ginny~moderator on Wednesday, January 30, 2008 - 09:24 am:

I'd start with responding "That is rude and you are not allowed to speak to me like that." Then, if the child truly doesn't understand what was rude about it, explain. If it persists, set a specific consequence: If you are rude to me X will happen - specific to the child (you will not be allowed to use the phone for X period of time; you will not be allowed to watch TV for X period of time; etc.) and follow through. They pick it up from their peers and to some extent they pick it up from how you and dh interact, but they need to learn very quickly that kids cannot do/say what adults do, before it gets them into trouble with someone who doesn't love them like their mom does. And, you want them to have a respectful attitude toward you and dh.

By Tink on Wednesday, January 30, 2008 - 11:43 am:

Similar to Ginny's advice, I'd just take the joking around in stride but when it's not appropriate, I'd say "That's not okay now" and repeat what I'd asked them to do without making a big deal about it...for the first week or so, just to teach when it is and isn't acceptable. After that time, I'd say "I asked you to _______. Now you'll have to go without TV this evening" or whatever you think fits. The nuances of when joking around is and isn't okay can be a fine line and most kids have to learn where that line lays.

By Lieska on Friday, February 1, 2008 - 09:42 am:

I am right there with you on the mouthing off and the fine line between! I just told Dh the other night maybe we shouldn't even let them joke anymore just until we get it under control. My kids (for the most part LOL) are good kids. I know they don't mean to be disrespectful. It's obvious to us that it is ignorance and boundry testing. That said I feel like I've been patient and a little to lax just trying let them learn. Now, I am ready to cinch the reigns and not let them even do it in humor. My kids are about the same age and I have a a2 year old. Now she does it! She hit the dog the other day and when he yelped she said "ha ha" to him. It was obvious she didn't know what it meant but she used it in the right context so that tells me she did know...
All this said, like the others, I'm coming from a respect aspect. I also tell them it's not okay to speak to ANYONE, including their friends, and especially each other, in such a disrespectful way. The one that makes me crazy is "duhhhhh" in a condensending way.
oh, and consistency.

By Dawnk777 on Friday, February 1, 2008 - 09:51 am:

I didn't like my kids saying butthead, (or dumbhead. I don't quite remember now.) It seemed a bad name to be calling another person. I think they'd heard it on TV, or something. So, they really didn't say it after that, for the most part, but sometimes in the car, or in play at home, the word would be part of the "story" and the character in the "story" always got punished in some way, for saying it. So, I didn't care, when it was part of the play they were acting out. They knew the difference and it sounded different when it was part of their "story", then when they were actually using it against each other.