Okay....another question for those BTDT mom's.
My step-daughter will be a senior this year...she's got most of her college 'career' mapped out...major in psychology, minor in Spanish. Her tuition is covered (thank god!) by what they call a promise scholarship. I have looked into the financial end of room and board and books and right now without any other financial help I'm looking at $738 a month for 8 months for 4 years(hopefully) ANYWAY....my question is...I think you are released from the child support obligation when the kids turn 18...is this correct or does it continue if they are in college??? Is there any legal way to get the 'absent parent' to help out with college expenses or is that a cross your fingers and hope thing. I'd love to hear from ALL of you that have any information on this subject!!
Thanks

By Kolbysmom on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 02:14 pm:

My parents were divorced when I was 17. My dad had to pay child support until I was 21 or until I graduated from college...whichever came later. Also, in the divorce agreement, there were to split all college expenses 50%.

By Karen~moderator on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 02:41 pm:

It varies by state. She can file the FAFSA and apply for Federal Stafford Loans. You can also sign as a co-borrower for her for a Student Signature Loan or a Student Excel Loan through Salliemae.

Depending on the situation, the Federal Stafford loans are either subsidized, where the government pays the interest while the student is in college, or unsubsidized, where the interest accumulates. If the student stays in school, fall and spring semester, until they graduate, the loans don't become due until 6 months after they graduate. Same with the private loans. Excel offers student and parent loans.

The reason I mentioned signing as a co-borrower above, is that freshmen are not normally given private education loans without one. The interest rates are really low.

With both Stafford and private loans, you have 20 years to pay them off. Once they graduate, they can consolidate them.

If she hasn't filed the FAFSA, she should do so now: FAFSA

Here's the link for private loans: Salliemae

I've got 3 in college now. One graduates in December. One is a freshman/sophomore in massage therapy, and the 3rd is a sophomore/junior business major.

We have parent and student loans coming out the ying yang. My son has for this school year, a subsidized Stafford, an unsubsidized Stafford and Student Signature loan.

She should also check into grants. My oldest DD who is 32, graduating in December, has gotten grants because she's on her own.

HTH

By Karen~moderator on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 02:43 pm:

BTW, in Louisiana where I live, after the child support obligation ends at high school graduation or age 19, whichever comes first, the non-custodial parent cannot then be forced to contribute to college education expenses UNLESS you have that specified in your divorce decree. I was stupid and didn't get that when we were divorced and I am paying a high price for it now.

By Janet on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 03:41 pm:

My sister endured the nightmare of her support being cut off the second her son turned 18... in November of his senior year in h.s.! My own divorce decree is the same (state of Kansas). My dh has asked me in the past if there's been any talk between me and my ex about college expenses, but (shame on me) I haven't broached the subject. I imagine we'll just be on our own with her education, like everything else has been, unless I grow a backbone in the next four years.

By Angellew on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 04:39 pm:

Here is a website that may answer some on your questions.

www.divorcesource.com/WV/info/childsupport.shtml

But, is really does depend on what state you live in and how your divorce decree was written, and they can be tricky.

Here is Massachusetts, you pay child support until the age of 18, unless the child goes on to college and then the payments remain in place until 21. Now, here is the tricky part, depending on how the divorce was written, part time attendance could count as "in school". Also, whether they are living at home or on campus (usually the child support still goes to the mother because they have to maintain a home for the child). There are so many different laws and variations and "loops" that there is no easy answer. Hopefully, the website will help you!

Can you tell I've been through this???

By Karen~moderator on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 - 07:54 pm:

Yes! LOL I've learned the hard way. Janet, grow that backbone quickly, or you WILL end up like me with mounds of debt and no financial help. Thank God my new DH is not only willing and supportive, but insistent we do everything we can to insure these kids get educations!

A suggestion to anyone with high school juniors or seniors, and this is something you're going to have to be willing to spend a considerable amount of time on - check with the schools, check with the book store (there's a book you can buy which lists all kinds of scholarships and grants available) and do a LOT of checking online for scholarships and grants. There are scholarships and grants for some pretty ridiculous things, as well as for physical disabilities, financial disabilities, past and present illnesses, ethnicity and many, many other reasons. Some of them are only $500 scholarships, but all it means to your child is that they spend some time writing an essay on a given subject. Make them do some of the legwork too.

Believe me, I've learned this the hard way, and hopefully some of my experiences can help some of you.

By Karen~moderator on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 - 07:32 am:

BUMP!

By Eight_Kids on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 - 09:01 am:

I have a couple websites bookmarked...one is like the book you mentioned...full of essays. I've been trying to find ones that she might be interested in. I found one from the duct tape people (this one cracked me up and my dd would NEVER do it...my ds's might) you have to make yours and your dates prom outfits totally out of duct tape. That's insane. There is humor throughout this process.
Thanks for all the responses. School starts the 26th and I think I'm going to get with her counsellor...they've been working together on this for 3 years now...hopefully she will have LOTS of useful information for me.

By Bobbie~moderatr on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 - 09:07 am:

I was going to suggest the same thing. I know your DH is on SSD correct? There are programs through Social Security to help cover living expenses. And if she collects a SSI check through him then that will continue until she graduates from college. They have grants that help cover books and basically if you are willing to fill out a lot of paper work you can loans, pells and grants to get her through all four years... I know two women right off the top of my head that went back to school and got everything covered including a percentage (if not all) expenses for day care for their children. Lack of funds shouldn't be an excuse for not furthering your education as their is help out there for sure....

By Bobbie~moderatr on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 - 09:14 am:

You better start looking into the stuff now.. Don't wait. She should have everything lined up before she graduates for sure.. If she has a school picked out she wants to attend she needs to be applying. And you need to talk to the counselor at her high school and the Financial aid through the colleges and find out what steps you need to take and when you need to have them taken by. What is that saying about the napping goose gets cooked.......

By Karen~moderator on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 - 10:23 am:

Yes, NOW is the time to do it. Jeff's little girlfriend just graduated high school in May and she wants to go to college badly. She got TOPS, a state scholarship, and a $500 annual book scholarship from UNO, but she still didn't have enough to cover it.

Unfortunately, her family is not at all supportive, emotionally or financially, and I've been trying to help her the last 2 weeks secure everything she needs to start at UNO next week when Jeff does. I even loaned her money for textbooks. It broke my heart to see someone trying SOOOOO hard to go to school and her family doing NOTHING to encourage or help her. And since she's a freshman, she can't even get a $1000 loan without a co-borrower. I found a few places online that will give loans to freshman without a co-borrower, but they have to have established credit, and she doesn't.

By Eight_Kids on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 - 07:54 pm:

Yes, DH gets ssi checks...I never thought about looking into that!! Thanks for the idea. She gets a check every month but it's only for $91. Better than nothing but not really a whole lot. I'll have to look into that!!