Do you other moms monitor everything your child/children watch? Do you try to watch a movie the entire way through first to see what kind of things are in it before you allow them to watch it?

By Tink on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 12:03 pm:

YES, especially movies. I usually watch TV with them unless I know it is a show that I've never had an issue with. PBS, and Playhouse Disney shows are usually safe. Nick Jr. too but not always the "older" versions of these channels in the afternoons and evenings.

By Trina~moderator on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 12:04 pm:

I used to be anal about this but have loosened up a wee bit as the kids got older (currently almost 6 & 8). For example, we took the kids to see Shrek 2 without previewing it first. I still monitor what they watch and check movie ratings at these sites:

KidsInMind.com

MovieMom.com

ScreenIt.com

I used to only allow my kids to watch PBS, Nick Jr. and select Disney shows. Now I'm OK with a few Nick shows. My kids like Sponge Bob and Fairly Odd Parents. Certainly not my favorites but they're fairly harmless. Generally, my kids aren't allowed to watch anything PG rated unless DH and I approve.

By Children03 on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 12:06 pm:

I have used ScreenIt.com before. I like my girls to watch PBS kids and disney and nick early morning and that is about it. If it is a movie I try to read the ratings.

By Emily7 on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 12:08 pm:

When my ds watches Noggin I don't monitor it. I do watch the movies with him for the first time, but he is only 2, so it isn't like he watches a lot of things. My parents wanted to take him as well as my nephews to see Harry Potter & I said no.

By Dawnk777 on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 12:18 pm:

2 would definitely be too young for Harry Potter. Lots of stuff would be scary for a 2yo plus he really wouldn't understand the plots!

By Children03 on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 12:26 pm:

I don't like Harry Potter anyway so it wouldn't even be an option for my children to watch it at any age.

By Mommmie on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 12:52 pm:

I did, but they get older and you don't have that much control over it anymore. I mean, you have some control, but not as much as you used to.

When my son was 8 he was invited to a b-day party to go see Daddy Daycare (PG) and when he got home my son tells me they saw Bruce Allmighty (PG-13).

Or the time he was at a b-day sleep over (age 9) and they watched Scary Movie 2 (PG-13). I would never have my son watch that.

Things like that start to happen.

By Palmbchprincess on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 02:21 pm:

I think moms can go overboard with this. There are things I watch now that I'm like "I can't believe that is in a kids show", but when I was a kid I didn't notice. Most obvious example example, Scooby Doo. Tons of innuendo, towards drugs, sexuality, etc., but as a kid I just thought "Scoooooby!!!!" There are so many cartoons that have underlying things, but you have to have know what it means to pick up on it. I mainly steer my kids towards things on Nick Jr., Noggin, or Playhouse Disney, only because they are more educational. We watch SpongeBob, Fairly Odd Parents, and so on. They don't get it, it's just a simple show to them.

By Children03 on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 03:01 pm:

Yes, but in my opinion t.v. can have a lot of influence on your children's lives. The smallest thing can affect them. I know it does because I hear children always repeating what they have heard or acting out what they saw in a movie. I can't stand any of the cartoons where the children have sassy, ugly attitudes towards their parents. If you allow them to watch something that has those things in it I personally think that just gives them permission to act that way too. It seems like if you allow them to watch those things, you as the parent are saying "Oh go ahead and watch this movie even though it has ugly things in it because it won't influence you a bit." I think toddlers are the most impressionable at their age. Children sometimes can't separate reality and make believe.

By Nancy on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 03:52 pm:

I watch movies with her and really limit the channels my dd can watch. There have been times when I'll let her watch something other than PBS, nick jr or playhouse disney and I always seem to go back to them. She does like watching the Disney channel movies and we use to watch a lot more of them than we do now. When I started to notice little changes in her attitude that I felt were beyond her years we stopped watching the movies.

By Trisa on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 04:23 pm:

Did you know you can order movies that they take
all the bad stuff out of? Try cleanfilms.com
and christiansunite.com

By Children03 on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 04:27 pm:

Thanks Trisa.

By Ginny~moderator on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 07:31 pm:

I always censored what my kids watched. TV was limited to an hour a day during the school week, and the three of them had to agree on the program (and it had to be a program I allowed). Saturday mornings they could only watch programs I allowed, and generally Saturday evening or Sunday evening it was an hour of programs I approved. If no approved programs, no TV. Same for movies, until they were 15 or 16.

I agree, April, what children (and adolescents) see can have a great influence on them. I was and am greatly concerned about the prevalence of violence, disrespectful sexuality and just plain crude rudeness on TV and in movies. I think if kids watch much of it, it tends to numb their judgment about what is and is not acceptable in real life.

I also didn't allow videogames in the house (70s and 80s), and probably would not allow more than a half hour or hour of computer or video games now - again, censoring for violence and crudeness. My niece's son is graduating from high school this month, and she had much the same limits for him. Doesn't seem to have hurt him.

Footnote: The son who is living with me now pointed out that of course at their friends' houses they watched stuff I didn't allow. He agreed, however, with my comment that while he was watching he probably had me in the back of his head pointing out why it wasn't suitable or allowed. (Just like I hear my dear departed mom in the back of my head when I do things I know she wouldn't approve of.) I think it is important to set standards for kids, including standards for acceptable entertainment.

By Mommmie on Friday, June 11, 2004 - 10:24 pm:

To counteract some of the cr*p on TV, I make my son watch Leave It To Beaver sometimes. I record it on the DVR. I highly recommend it. Good modeling for kids.

By Mommierenee on Saturday, June 12, 2004 - 12:59 pm:

I try to monitor what they watch very closely. My 4 year old likes to watch cartoon network & I don't really like it, I think there is some crap on there. Other than that, they only watch the PBS type shows.

By Boxzgrl on Saturday, June 12, 2004 - 02:55 pm:

Since DD is only 1 and seems to have no interest in the tv (besides the sound it makes when she bangs on the projector screen, LOL) I don't know what side i'd go with. As a child I had no rules over tv, I was watching rated R horror films with my Dad. Of course cartoons and such werent as bad as they are today but as a child I remember watching He-Man, She-Ra, The Transformers, Power Rangers (well, I watched it with my bro when he was little) etc. and it had no effect on me. I understood that it was make believe and my Mom in no way would let us play fight or re enact scenes.

As far as movies, I would probably screen those when DD is one day interested in tv. I think as a child its hard to differentiate real life tv because theres nothing obvious that shows its make believe (such as cartoons are drawings, bright colors... obviously not real). I know each child was different but thats how I determined if movies were "fake" or "real" when I was young.

Ahhhhh.... thank goodness I dont have tv problems... quite yet!

By Texannie on Saturday, June 12, 2004 - 03:04 pm:

I think it really depends on each child and their personalities. My son was young when Power Rangers first started and all the controversy they brought. For my son, he got the good message they had and didn't try to imitate the fighting. Other friends of his would act out after seeing it. I was/am very strict about PG13 movies. My son was very comfortable with either calling me or removing himself from the room if a movie was being watched that he knew he couldn't see. My dd is not like that, she pushes all limits, so I have to really watch her. Ironically, my ds will be the one to say "oh mom, that movie is really ok for her to watch" or "mom, you shouldn't let her see that".
It's funny. He has not seen any of the Matrix movies cause I don't allow him to see R rated movies. He was babysitting for two boys this spring that were 2nd and 5th grade. The mom says to my ds, I rented Matrix 2 for ya'll to watch". He tells her he can't see R rated movies then calls me laughing saying "gee mom, the babysitter can't watch the movies that his charges can!"

By Bellajoe on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 06:45 pm:

My kids watch Noggin, Playhouse Disney, and Nick Jr. and PBS, none of those have bad things for them in it at all. Once in a while they end up watching something that i don't really like, like Dave the Barbarian, they just think certain things are funny. If there is a more "adult" comment in the show it just goes right over their heads. My kids know that there are certain words we don't say in our house, like the word "stupid". Of course i don't let them call each other stupid. So if someone on a show says that word my 3 yr old ds says "we don't say that word!", he knows what is right and what is wrong. If you happen to be watching a show or movie and something happens or is said that you don't approve of, just let your kids know that that behavior is not tolerated in your house, or its just not a nice thing to do or say.

We never let our kids see the NEWs. They don't need to know about the bad things( i.e. murder, or children found dead or something horrible like that) that happen in the world yet. And they don't usually watch anything but childrens shows. They love Lizzie McGuire on Disney, that's a good one that the whole family can tolerate watching.

Sometimes they may end up watching a movie with us if we approve of it. My dd likes Spiderman and Pirates of the Caribbean. She doesn't get scared watching them, she knows it is all pretend...just like i did when i was little. My ds is afraid of the green goblin in spiderman so he just closes his eyes or leaves the room at that part. And they don't ever watch a show with sex scenes in it....but neither do we really

I guess it all depends on the kid and how they react to things.

By Mommmie on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 07:07 pm:

I think age has a lot to do with it. Once they hit formal schooling, that's when the problems start. Well, that was when my son discovered kids were watching things he had never heard of. At that point the worst thing my son saw were those awful commercials on Cartoon Network.

My beef with movies and TV is the sexuality that is there. Can't even channel surf without catching naked bodies. I was surprised to hear about the younger kids (girls ages 8-12) watching Friends. I don't have a girl, but it seems like a lot of sex talk for that age group.

By Mommierenee on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 07:26 pm:

Bellajo, I know what you mean about them saying "stupid". My kids don't say that to each other or to anyone else for that matter. They do hear it on TV sometimes, esp. on Cartoon Network! I really don't like them watching Cartoon Network, like I was saying, but they still know that they aren't supposed to say the things they hear. My 4 year old is getting to the point where he doesn't say the words he's not supposed to say, even if he hears others say it.
We do let them watch the news if they're interested. They get bored with news shows, but I want them to see what's going on in the real world.
Also, anything they have questions about that they see on TV (smoking, for example) we always try & answer them honestly in their own language.

By Yjja123 on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 08:00 pm:

I monitor but do not always censor (meaning I let them watch some I do not like). There are shows I personally dislike (rugrats for example) that prove to be great learning experiences for them. Angelica is a sassy, rude, bossy child. My children know her behavior would never be allowed in our home. In real life they are exposed to children that behave this way. I cannot always be with them but I can teach them how to deal with people/things like that. Sometimes "bad shows" give me the opportunity to start a discussion about what the person is doing and why it is wrong/etc.

By Mommierenee on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 08:17 pm:

Oh yeah, I don't really like Caillou, but I let the kids watch it.

By Tink on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 08:26 pm:

I agree with the Rugrats comments. We have used that show for several discussions about Angelica's behavior and Chuckie's fears. I don't like Caillou because I think he is whiny and, compared to me and dh, his parents put up with temper tantrums that we wouldn't. I let the kids watch these occasionally but I try not to let these be the shows that they watch. There are much better choices out there, including no TV on at all.

By Children03 on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 09:18 pm:

I use to let my kids watch Cailou, but one day I realized good grief could that child whine just a bit more? I felt like that might make the impression on my girls that it is okay to whine to mommy, daddy and grandma when they don't get their way. The parents do put up with his whining and the mother acts so darn nice to him for it. I could never be that calm when my child is acting like that throwing tantrums. I don't allow them to watch it anymore because of that and I can't stand to hear the whining.

By Mommierenee on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 09:22 pm:

Me either! Caillou's mommy must be taking some sort of anti anxiety meds ALL the time!! To be that calm & relaxed when he is CONTINUOUSLY whining!

By Palmbchprincess on Sunday, June 13, 2004 - 09:32 pm:

I had my first Calliou encounter with Amy's DS, Adrian. Amy cringed when Adrian wanted to watch it, an told me how whiny Calliou was. One episode, and I SWORE that show would NOT be allowed at my house. I don't let the kids watch it, and never will. How could anyone tolerate that whining and why would a children's show portray such behavior as ok?! Yeah, Angelica whines on Rugrats, but at least it is treated like acceptable behavior!!

By 2princesses on Monday, June 14, 2004 - 02:04 am:

I try to monitor as much as I can. I agree with those of you who said Caillou is whiny. My girls love that show but noticed a change in my daughters after watching a show of Caillou where he said "stupid" and he was afraid of practically everything. For several days my daughters were saying stupid even after explaining to them over and over that it is a bad word. They were also starting to get scared of things they were never afraid of as a simple little ladybug. They were starting to sound exactly like him and saying "I don't want to" all day which is not how they normally would act.

By Nicosmom on Monday, June 14, 2004 - 08:59 pm:

I agree. Caillou is a brat. How old is he supposed to be anyway? Maybe that is where my son is getting his odd fears from. Stupid is a bad word in our house too, I didn't know Caillou said things like that. Anyway, he hasn't wanted to watch it this week yet. I prefer playhouse disney.