My son Brendan turned three in February, we've been potty training what seems forever. In November he was doing really really well and then got sick, he had diarhea for almost 2 weeks that he was on medicine and it really stalled the potty training. We've since picked it up but he just has no interest in it. He'll go if I put him on the potty but will not tell me when he has to go. I've spent the last two days so frustrated in cleaning up my carpet and tile from accidents.

I'm at the point where I KNOW he knows what he's doing, I'll catch him squatting and going in his underwear, and I've started getting on to him when he has an accident. I hate that.

Any thoughts on how to get through to him that he needs to go on the potty? Stickers don't work, I've tried the potty chart route and he could care less about them.

The major thing is that he has to be trained by the time he starts daycare in June so this is a have to situation... Any advice or thoughts would be much appreciated.

Christy

By Amecmom on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 01:43 pm:

Put the Pull-Ups on him for now. This way you won't have to clean up messes and his underwear. Stop trying to train for a week or two and then let him take the lead. He may be doing this to test you.
Does he know he's going into daycare in June and that this is why he has to use the potty? If so, this may be a protest or a resistance to daycare.
Boys do not train as fast as girls do.
Is there a food that he likes? M&M's worked for a friend of mine.
My little one is having some success with chicken nuggets and french fries as a reward.
Good luck,
Ame

By Christylee on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 01:52 pm:

We've talked about daycare but nothing has been said that he has to be trained to him about it. He's very excited about seeing "kids" and "friends" so I've been using that as an incintive, once he goes potty all the time he gets to see the "kids" and "friends". We've had a better afternoon so far than our morning was so we will see.

I may have to try the m&m thing as much as I don't want to have to. lol...

Christy

By Debbie on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 02:09 pm:

I went and picked up a bunch of trinkets from the party store. I put them in a "treasure box" I let my ds pick each time he went on the potty. Just try and be as relaxed as possible. I am right there with you and know that cleaning up accidents is no fun. My ds(3-1/2) is trained for pee, we are still working on bms. He trained for pee in about 3 days, but didn't want to use the potty for bm's. We just went on vacation, so we stuck him in pull-ups. He will still pee in the potty with those on. I am giving it a rest on the other for a few weeks and then will try again. Just don't push too hard. Boys have a tendency to hold their bms if pushed while potty training. This happened with my older ds. It ended up causing him some constipation problems and prolonged potty training. Good luck. I am sure he will catch on soon.

By Tink on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 02:34 pm:

I'm sorry you are going through this. My advice is not to use Pull-ups. He won't feel it when he is wet and to most kids, including my ds and dd, it feels like a diaper so why wouldn't he go in it? I had to retrain my dd after a severe bladder infection and for whatever reason, it has been a lot harder to train her the 2nd time around.We went back to taking her to the potty every 15 minutes the first 3 days, then every 30, and we're up to an hour now. I think we are ready now to leave it up to her to let us know. It means sticking close to home for a while, but it is worth in the long run, IMO. My dd works for part of a starburst. She didn't care for m&ms. I also like the treasure box idea. It gives them some control and we all know how much they love control at this age.

By Eve on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 - 04:49 pm:

I am so right there. My DD is 3 (Not one of the girls that trained before boys!)and is not trained. She goes through stages of sitting on the toilet and does pretty well and then we have days where she does not go a single time. She wants to wear pullups, so I let her. I plan on letting her wear undies around this Summer.

Good luck! I would go with Bribery! LOL! Candy worked really well with my DD. The only reason I stopped, is she wasn't going anymore and only asking for candy. Now, we are trying stickers and small gifts. I feel for you! It's so frusterating! I chose a preschool that didn't require her to be trained because I just didn't feel she would be ready. So, I feel for you so much! *Fingers crossed*

By Christylee on Thursday, April 29, 2004 - 12:20 pm:

Thanks for all of the encouragement, yesterday was a much better day and well today has been great! He's not a single accident at all today and it's almost noon BUT that's with me taking him, not him telling me. I guess it's a start!

Christy

By Feona on Friday, April 30, 2004 - 06:28 am:

I put ds in the pull ups because I didn't want alot of accidents. After 6 months he was potty trained fully. I gave him a choice underwear or pull ups. After 6 months he said underwear.

Finally he was fully potty trained at 3 and a half months. He really trained himself. I couldn't get him to do anything.

By Dawnk777 on Friday, April 30, 2004 - 02:46 pm:

My kids were 3-1/2 when they were trained. They liked gummy bears! Also, my oldest one liked using public potties because then sometimes she got real candy. Then one time she went just to get the candy and we didn't have any cash on us. She was so mad. That was the end of the candy for going potty, though.

By Kathym on Monday, May 3, 2004 - 11:25 am:

My son was almost 4 (3yrs 9 mo)but one day decided he wasn't wearing diapers anymore (he hated pull ups and quite frankly they are expensive). My daughters were much younger. Anyway, my point is they will train when they are ready and no child goes to kindergarten in diapers!!

By Tink on Monday, May 3, 2004 - 09:35 pm:

Not to be a pessimist but I have a friend who's son just turned five and he still will not go poop in a potty or toilet. I don't think his mom knows what she will do since he is supposed to start kindergarten in July. He just refuses to go in a toilet and if his mom refuses to put a pull-up on so he can go, he will just mess his pants. He has no other delays, is a fairly well-adjusted child, and his parents have been working on this, off and on, for over 2 years. His pediatrician has done some tests to make sure it isn't some kind of muscle issue, but he isn't apologetic or ashamed that he has had an accident. He tells her that he wouldn't make a mess if she would give him a pull-up. I don't even know what the school district's policy is on this. I would assume that they require potty training in order to enroll...but who knows?