My 2 year old is being difficult
Moms View Message Board: Parenting Discussion: Archive January-June 2004:
My 2 year old is being difficult
It has definitely been the terrible twos at our house. And, he's only been 2 for 3 months.
My girls never went through the terrible two's so this is extrememly frustrating for me and DH.
I could write a novel 
But today, I have just one thing that I want to get control of. My DS has a SCREAMING problem. DH says he screams like a girl. It is very high pitched and loud. I have no idea how to make him stop. We've tried everything. It's been going on for a couple months now.
He screams if he's not getting his own way. If the girls have a toy that he wants, he screams and screams till they give it to him. In this instance it's not a cry.....just scream after scream.
At this very moment he is laying on his bedroom floor reaching out from under the door screaming at the top of his lungs. (this time it's a cry/scream) He has been so awful today  I don't know what to do with him.
We've tried a dozen different approaches to teach him that it's not OK to scream like that. We have been very consistent with punishments. At this point I just want to ship him off. He is driving me insane. I can't handle being with him all day while he's acting like this.
Anyone else dealt with a screamer before? Any suggestions?
Oh by a toddler! Mine is two and almost 4 months. It's sure no fun dealing with them when they get nuts. Mine's not a screamer, he's a runner, but my friend has a three year old boy who screams like that when he is frustrated. He has other issues (PDD), but what I've learned from her might be helpful to you. He screams because he doesn't have the words to let anyone know how he feels. Sometimes, she tries to ask him what he wants, or why he's upset. She holds him, to calm him, or sometimes she just ignores the scream (depending on the reason for it).
It sounds like your son has learned that he gets attention and gets what he wants when he screams that way.
It's hard to do, but could you just ignore it? Maybe if he gets no reaction at all from anyone he'll stop in a few weeks?
Take heart, he'll grow out of it when he gets more verbal. In the meantime, get some earplugs
Hugs to you and a pat on the back.
Ame
(((Robin)))
Alyssa (age 45 months) was like that since she was two. We went at it several times, couldn't go into a store, she wanted everything she saw, throw temper tantrums.
I finally stopped going to stores, or went early in the morning without her. She finally figured that out and started behaving. There was no punishment that would help, I would just send her to her room and she knew I was mad.
However, it was the same at home. For Alyssa, she is very independent, I mean she loves me but she wants to try everything herself. I finally learned to leave her try and she and I are in a much happier place. It takes longer to do everything but we are happier.
I must say, she is growing out of it, like the ladies here said she would. She just wants to do everything I do or the older sisters do.
But our other two were never like this, some days I just went to bed exhausted and crying. Dh had no idea what I went through in a days time.
I'm glad it's going away and we are in a happier place.
Just remember to do a lot of deep breathing exercises;)
LOL Marg...I've been doing the deep breathing all day.
Remember how I've been making my girls Easter Dresses? Well, I finished one completely today. I had DD try it on to make sure I didn't need to alter it at all. When she took it off I told her to put it on the bar stool. Well....fastforward to about 20 minutes ago.....I was cleaning the table with a spray bleach. The phone rang in the bedroom so I ran to get it. When I came back out, DS was spraying the bleach towards the dress. Not intentionally at the dress....just mostly spraying for fun. There were several pretty good spots on the dress. I couldn't tell if it was bleaching the fabric or not. I'm sure it will thought because I've gotten some on my shirts before and it bleaches them. I called DH crying and he told me to put it in the washer. Not sure why LOL....damage already done, but I threw it in there anyway. I have no idea how it will look once it's washed and dried. DS is now in his room screaming again. I had to put him in there so I could take a breather.
Thanks Ame for the suggestions. Maybe I'll talk to the girls and we can all decide not to give in to the screams. Once he starts his screaming fit they usually give him what he wants just so he'll shut up.
I can not wait for this phase to be over.
All mine do this, even the 18 mo old. They just do different versions. The middle crys about everything, the oldest used (and ocassionally still does) pitch violent temper tantrums where he lashes out against me, and the youngest seems like he is headed for the violent temper tantrums where he trys to hurt himself. Some kids just have stronger temperments than others and as long as you are being consistent with the discipline it will fade away..I promise. Everyone kept telling me that with the oldest and I had a hard time seeing it somedays. There were days when I spent the whole day "dealing" with him but now that he is older it is A LOT better.
My oldest is a great big brother but he also gives into them when they cry, it breaks his heart to hear them cry. I have talked to him about it over and over and he is finally getting better about it. If they cry for something he has and he gives it them I usually make them give it back. I also don't give them ANYTHING when they are screaming/crying, I put them in their room and tell them when they can ask nice and walk away. They usually get their mouths down to the crack of the door and scream under it so I am sure to hear them, we have wood floors too so it echo's real nice.
Good Luck!
Thanks Coop
BTW...I washed the dress and it isn't completely ruined. There is just one spot. It is a pink dress and the spot is a very faint yellow. The spot is still more pink than yellow which is a good thing. You can't even really tell. DH looked the dress over and couldn't even find the yellow spot, so I guess it's going to be OK.
I'm so glad the dress is saved! Have a happy Easter!
Ame
I'm so glad to hear the dress is okay, that made me sick when I read that.
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