Just want to know what some of you mom's think about letting baby cry it out or what. My 31/2 month old seems to cry alot. He always wants someone to hold him...he is healthy....between, hubby teen and myself it's getting to be a bit much. My baby book says you can't spoil a baby...what do you all think? I would think he would be a little more content by now? Must go baby is crying.

By Emdee on Tuesday, February 17, 2004 - 08:05 pm:

Being a first time mom, I only have my experience with my 9 month old to go by. But I don't really like the idea of her crying it out. I let her cry when I can tell she is going to give it up within 10 minutes or so, but when I can tell she is just sreaming and it's not getting better, then I go get her. She has always been a hard to manage baby, although she has such a pleasant personality at the same time??? I just have a hard time not comforting her when I know that is all she wants. But every baby and every mom is different--what one likes I know others don't agree with. Mine was sleeping through the night until 6 months and she started up with ear infections. Since then (she is also sick all the time) she is up all the time; a good night is only up once or twice. I am still breastfeeding so maybe that is the reason. But I don't let her cry it out at night--maybe that is the other reason. And she usually prefers me to my husband so I am the one to get up with her 99% of the time. I will let her whimper for about 10 minutes, but when the whimpering turns into crying I usually go get her. Maybe the wrong technique, but I am learning by experience! Good luck--I think the good times with them far outweigh the bad times!!!

By Trina~moderator on Tuesday, February 17, 2004 - 08:58 pm:

Here is a discussion we've had on this very topic in the past.

Crying It Out

By Jclark222 on Tuesday, February 17, 2004 - 09:03 pm:

O My God do I know how you feel. My 11 Month old won't sleep in his crib for more than 3-4 hours. I have tried everything. I just put him in bed with us and he sleeps great. I can't let him cry it out either. His doctor said it's a phase and one night he'll just sleep on his own. I don't think you can spoil them by holding them or comforting them. I feel some babies need more comforting than others and that's just there personalitity. I wish I had better advise. Just know that your not the only one.

By Sunny on Tuesday, February 17, 2004 - 10:28 pm:

Yes, follow the link.

I will say that you can NOT spoil a baby under 6 months. By responding to their cries, they are learning that the world is a loving and caring place. It also teaches them that they can trust that their needs will be met and that, in turn, usually means they cry less

By Colette on Tuesday, February 17, 2004 - 10:38 pm:

You can't spoil a baby, he's crying because it's the only way he has of lettingyou know he needs something. I tried crying it out w/my first child, and I just couldn't do it. I was far more stressed listening to her cry than I was consoling her and losing sleep.

By Brianna on Tuesday, February 17, 2004 - 11:56 pm:

@ Jclark222 omg ! ditto! i cant wait for the day she sleeps alone!
so my husband and i can get a good night sleep! and my little one just turned 1 yr old!

By Boxzgrl on Wednesday, February 18, 2004 - 01:32 am:

DD will be 9 months old in a few days and I tried CIO. It was harder for me because as she was crying, I was listening and not sleeping. I gave it up and now she will cry for her paci, I give it to her and were back to bed (shes 100% in the crib). It will be a bad habit to break later in life but i'll worry about it then. Shes starting to find her paci on her own sometimes too. I dont feed at night b/c I worry about tooth decay. But im kinda excited b/c the last few nights as soon as I walk in to give her a paci she looks at me and lays down to go back to bed, as if shes just making sure im still here. And i'll also add she probably sleeps through the night once a week.

Bottom line, for me it was a lot easier not to worry about whether or not to CIO but let everything run its course naturally.

By Momaroze on Wednesday, February 18, 2004 - 10:08 am:

Sunny I do agree. It just feels never ending...and I do tend to overdue things, confidence thing maybe? I haven't really had much of a break in weeks...hubby has been so busy. This weekend coming is my day as he says so it will be a good time to clear my thoughts and hopefully relax. Trina, don't have much time now to read past discussion, briefly did and thanks. I'm not alone that's basically what I wanted to hear. And YES I can't seem to just let him cry it out either maybe later....when he's older? Thanks all, it's comforting to hear your stories.

By Jtw on Wednesday, February 18, 2004 - 07:58 pm:

I would say that 3 1/2 months is a bit too young to allow a baby to cry it out. As was mentioned above, that is their only way of telling you what they need. Some babies just need more TLC than others. My son was terrible about going to sleep and sleeping through the night. Finally when my daughter was born (they are a year apart) we let him cry it out because we were sick of having to get up for two kids. I does suck, but it really does work. I felt really guilty, but he cried for about 40 minutes the first night, and then 20 the next, and each night was less and less. I really think that a few nights of bad sleep are better than a lifetime, and you will be so relieved when it is finally over. So in answer, I would wait until your child is a little older (maybe 9 mos to 1 year) and if there is still a huge problem, talk to your dr. about the options.