My son is 18 months and he has started this screaming thing when he wants something he can't have, i am losing my mind listening to him ALL day but do not want to give in so that he continues. How long will it take him to get the message? Also he is so clingy, i can't do anything or he gets mad. I f i get on the computer he screams, if i cross stitch he screams, when i play with him he is fine but i can't play with him ALL day everyday, when my husband gets home he expects us both at his beck and call, so i don't even get a break then, I am a stay at home mom that cross stitches to make money and i need a break sometimes!!

By Gammiejoan on Friday, February 6, 2004 - 08:17 am:

I know that it will be difficult, but you need to "nip this in the bud" right now. My now 2 1/2 year old grandson's behavior was very similar to the way you are describing your ds's. With a great deal of firmness on our part, he is much improved now. I keep him during the day while his parents work. I have been able to give him plenty of love and attention, but I don't want to hear him screaming off and on all day and expecting me to be at his beck and call. One of the most difficult things for me to remember was not to give in to screaming back at him. I would just firmly but calmly tell him "no" and try to redirect his attention to something that he could have rather than the thing he wanted that he couldn't have. He also was rather clingy at times and expected us to entertain him. I would give him something to play with, play with him for a few minutes, and then tell him that I had something else to do and would come back to him later. At first, there was very little improvement. Finally, however, something started clicking with him. Now he plays by himself for long periods of time and is much less fussy. Sometimes he even tells me that he wants to play by himself in his room. Just be persistent with your ds, and things should eventually improve. In the meantime, vent to us anytime.

By Ladypeacek on Friday, February 6, 2004 - 09:03 am:

Thanks for that, its nice to know my son isn't the only terror!! I don't scream at him but I feel like it alot. He plays okay alone as long as we are just sitting doing nothing, if we begin to do something he stops and starts to scream, i have an 8 year old daughter and she never did this, she had a very sweet nature at this age, now she starts to throw fits like him at times but with her its easier to fix, i just send her to her room till she is done and she quits pretty quick but i can't really do that yet with my son, and he is a climber so the crib doesn't keep him either. Right now i have been ignoring him but he just hasn't caught on that his screaming isn't working for him!

By Gammiejoan on Friday, February 6, 2004 - 11:10 am:

Kenna, your ds does sound a lot like my grandson. At that age he was the most prolific climber I had ever seen. We were constantly stopping him from climbing or getting him down from some place he had already climbed. I'm talking about places like counter tops, stove tops, dresser tops, and even window sills. This climbing went on for months despite our constant efforts to stop it. I still don't know if it was anything we did or not, but for some reason this behavior gradually decreased to the point where it is much more manageable now.

By Mommmie on Friday, February 6, 2004 - 02:07 pm:

Sounds like my son (now 9 years old). I remember when he was a baby/toddler and he saw me putting food to my mouth he would scream and tantrum. He didn't like I was doing something for me and was not paying attention to him. I had to sneak bites of food and I ended up losing a lot of weight. I was like Pavlo's dog and associated me eating with unbearable temper tantrums so I didn't eat.

And it wasn't just that. He was so clingy, so demanding, it was just horrible. He would kick the back of my seat in the car and tantrum if I went straight and he wanted me to turn right. This started at age 2. Oh gosh, I could give you so many examples.

I ended up putting him in daycare fulltime at 23 months of age. It took him 6 weeks, but he finally understood the world didn't evolve around him, somewhat, and he stopped screaming there. The teachers were able to pass him around as they grew weary with him so no one person would lose their minds. I went home each day and laid in bed in the fetal position trying to recover from 23 months of that. I eventually got a job.

Now at 9, he is still a challenging child. Better, but not an easy child. He has ADHD and learning disabilities and speech problems. He is pleasant and cheerful and happy. He's still clingy and somewhat demanding and still expects all of the attention. For example, our next door neighbor's b-day party is Sunday. Besides being neighbors, they are classmates. My son has no desire to go because the b-day kid gets all of the attention and he gets none. He will tell you this. So, I'll take him. If he does something wrong bec he doesn't want to be there, he'll be grounded from video games. Nothing is simple or easy.

Good luck to you. I kept thinking my son would grow out of it, but he hasn't. He's tolerable, even pleasant and fun to be around. But he's still high-maintenance.

By Ladypeacek on Friday, February 6, 2004 - 02:58 pm:

well when my son is in the daycare at church he is great and they love him and laugh when i tell them he is so bad at home!! I thought about going to work but now that i am here in England it is very hard to find a job, i desperately want to take some online classes to finish my degree but i am scared he will distract me so much i won't be able to do it right. He better out grow this or i will be in the looney bin!!