As most of you know, my oldest ds (10) has some problems. He's been dx'd ADHD and Bipolar, and he's not yet stable on meds. I did finally get an IEP in place for him a little over a month ago. What good it did, I don't know. We had a meeting yesterday and the school he's in now is basically forcing him out. They say they don't have the personel or resources to handle him, but in reality I don't think they want to even try. So he'll be changing schools and going to a different elementary school in the same district that has a self contained classroom. There is one teacher and two full time aides and Robin will make the tenth student. He will have to ride the bus for about 45 minutes each way (now we're three blocks from his school). I am NOT happy about this, but Robin's therapist thinks the school is done with him and they're not going to do anything else to help so this is our only real option. They did give us two other options that really aren't, if ykwim. I hope this helps him. I'm upset with the school, but afraid if I do anything about it my younger son will suffer for it. Legally they're wrong. But again, I don't want younger ds to pay for it. Thanx for letting me vent.

By Melanie on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 10:49 am:

(((((((HUGS))))))))

I hope this turns out to be a much better situation for him. How sad and frustrating that this school isn't willing to help a child.

Keep us posted.

By Gammiejoan on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 11:49 am:

I can understand the position you are in. You could fight it, and the school system probably would be forced to take steps to accommodate your son in his current setting. It is my understanding that they are required by law to do this, but I might be wrong. My dil has been concerned that there may come a point in time when a self contained classroom might be suggested for my five year old grandson. She is a school teacher, and she says that she will fight to the end to prevent that from happening. We are very pleased that he seems to be doing much better this school year than last, but thus far I feel that his teacher is making most of the difference. She just seems to handle him better than any teacher he has had in the past. Vent to us anytime you want. I know it helps me to vent about my gs's situation. I know that my gs's situation is different from your ds's, but I really wouldn't like the self contained classroom or the forty-five minute bus ride each way. Let us know how everything goes.

By Conni on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 12:09 pm:

Cat, This is what we did w/Brandon his last 3 yrs of elementary school. The district here has certain special ed classes at each elementary school. It is not uncommon here that a child is transferred to the school that has the program he needs to be in. It is all to do with budgeting i am sure. For us it turned out to be very positive! I had to drive Brandon about 15 minutes to his new school. It was the only school that had the 'self-contained classroom' for behavioral issues. He stopped getting negative feedback from his teachers and peers immediately and was finally gettting the help he needed to succeed. At first I wasnt happy--but it didnt take long to see the positive side of things. He was in a class with 2 teachers and 1 full time aide. They were all 3 excellent. He was in a class with a wide range of students--from alot worse off than Brandon to kids that were doing better than Brandon. They were much more understanding and tolerant of Brandons issues. They got the IEP in place (the school he was at never even mentioned an IEP!) and began working FOR Brandon and not AGAINST Brandon. The goal was to work his way back into the mainstream classroom. By 4th grade he spent most of his day in the self contained class and slowly moved into the mainstream class that was right next door.
By 5th grade he was in the mainstream classroom for the majority of the his day and went into the resource room for 30 minutes at the end of the day. God blessed us that yr with a christian teacher that had a special ed child of her own!! She was so understanding and worked with us so well. She allowed Brandon to decide if he needed to leave the room on his own. Sometimes he would have a day where he simply couldnt focus in the classroom with all the other kids and he would take his work into the resource room where it was quiet and cozier and he could calm down, focus and do his work. Sometimes the resource teacher would help him one on one with work when his regular teacher could not (with 28 other kids in the classroom to tend to).

They gave him much more freedom to be Brandon.
Where the other school was pushing him to conform and behave just like all the other students--which he couldnt do at that time, because he isnt like all the other students!

He is now in Middle School this yr. He is in the mainstream classroom full time. He has 2 periods that have 2 teachers in the room. The extra teacher is there for him if he needs her. (and any other kids that need her of course!)He still has an IEP-- the goal now is to be off of the services by next year. It all depends on Brandon of course.

So, that has been our experience so far with IEP's and self-contained classrooms. I am kind of excited for Robin (I know you are upset), I think he might get some pressure off of him to be 'just like all the other kids'.

Brandons self-esteem was so low by the time we put him in the self-contained classroom. Those teachers were so good for him--Ironically one of the teachers is now teaching at the middle school that he attends. She has no idea how she has touched my son's life.

God really does have a plan even when we cant see it. I'll say a prayer for Robin and you!

By Cat on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 01:09 pm:

Thanx, Melanie, for the hugs. It is sad the school won't help him. I don't blame the principal or the classroom teacher, because I feel they really did want to help. The rest, I think, are the ones that pushed this. His poor classroom teacher--this is his first year teaching and Robin's therapist said he looked like he was about to have a nervous breakdown. You have to question the placement there, since there are five other 5th grade classrooms. Poor guy. I hope this doesn't make him quit teaching. I told my dh the first week of school that Robin was going to chew him up and spit him out.

Joan, at least the bus is a smaller one just for kids like Robin (being bussed from other parts of the district for special reasons) and it has seatbelts and a monitor and is door to door meaning he doesn't have to go to a bus stop 1/2 a mile away. The school itself is only about a 10-15 minute drive. I'll let you know how he's doing.

Conni, your post made me feel so much better. I wish you lived closer! I'm glad Brandon is doing so much better and hope the same happens for Robin. I've been trying to make this a positive thing for him and even told him about your son and how the class was so much better for him and let him be himself. He seemed to like that. Thank you so much for your post. Did you get my new email address? It's cathyliz@falconbroadband.net Hugs

By Sunny on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 01:09 pm:

I'm sure I know what a 'self-contained' classroom is, but could someone define it for me? I'm also curious why it took so long to put an IEP in place.

Cat, I don't know the full extent of your situation, but I can understand your frustration. Legally, the school has to accomodate him, and by sending him to another school in the distrct, they probably feel as if they are doing just that. I'm going to guess that it was presented to you that way, but "felt" more like they were passing it along and dropping this on someone else's lap. Who knows, it may be the best thing for him right now, but there are so many unknowns and apprehensions with a change like this. Call the school and ask to sit in on a class, meet the teacher and discuss the rules, curriculum and whatever else you are concerned about. THEN and only THEN can you decide if this is the best thing to do. Remember that you have the final say.

I also understand your fear of creating problems for your younger son, but don't let that fear dictate how you handle the situation with your older boy. While it would be nice if teachers and staff saw each sibling as an individual, it does happen that certain expectations (both good and bad) are put on the younger siblings by a select few. Don't let them scare you into keeping quiet. The squeky wheel does get the grease and for whatever negative feelings you presume they may have because of it, they'll know that they have to make sure to get it right with your other child, or you'll be banging on their door!

Good Luck. (((hugs)))

By Sue3 on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 02:05 pm:

Cat
I hope this school will be better for you and your ds.
what a trying for you and your family,
hope things go well,keep us posted!

By Trisa on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 02:14 pm:

I am sorry you have so much to
deal with. I also hope things get better real soon.

By Bobbie on Tuesday, November 11, 2003 - 11:00 pm:

Cat, I don't think forcing the school to set up something special for him would do any good for either of you. In our district the "special" children are bussed to one school. They are given smaller class sizes and more one on one. I know of several children in this program and I know of two aids and it is a much better situation for the kids. He will do fine... And they are trained to deal with him better and once he is handled correctly then he will learn and grow better. You really don't think you will regret this later... Big hugs Cat...

By Cat on Wednesday, November 12, 2003 - 12:38 pm:

Sunny, a self contained classroom is just that. Every subject is in the classroom with the same teacher. They don't leave for PE or art or music or anything else--until they start to mainstream (or what's called partial inclusion). Then they leave the classroom for one special or subject at a time. Eventually they are total inclusion at which time he can come back to his neighborhood school.

Sue and Trisa, thanx for thinking of me.

Bobbie, I'm hoping he does well here. We've talked and he seems okay with it for now. We'll see how he reacts when he's been there a few days.

I told his principal and teacher this morning and cleaned out his desk. I left the classrooom just as the other kids were coming in. I don't envy the teacher explaining to his class why Robin's gone and won't be back. His teacher seemed a bit upset. He's really a sweet and sensitive guy and I know he's struggling with this. We're going to visit the new school tomorrow morning first thing and let Robin meet his new teachers. They're hoping he can start Monday. He's actually going to be the 11th student. I asked what the max was and the teacher said if they get more than about 15 they will either hire another full time aide/teacher or split the class (it's 4th and 5th grades). I still have no idea what's going to happen for 6th grade but I guess we'll deal with that when the time comes. Thanx again for all the thoughts and prayers.

By Debbie on Wednesday, November 12, 2003 - 02:05 pm:

{{{{Cat}}}} I hope things go well at Robin's new school. Hopefully, you will have a great experience like Conni did. Keep us updated on how he is doing. I will be thinking of you both.

By Cat on Thursday, November 13, 2003 - 03:37 pm:

Thanx. Debbie. I will keep you updated.

We visited the school this morning and met all three teachers. Robin went with us and gravitated to the fish tank. We talked with the main teacher for about 30 minutes and the principal and vice principal both made time to stop in while we were there (the principal of the school Robin's leaving used to work at the new school and gave them a heads up and even talked to the new principal about what 5th grade teacher would be best for Robin when he's ready for inclusion). When we were leaving, Robin walked aheah with dh while I stood at the classroom door still talking to the teacher and there were two boys with an overhead projecter in the hallway tracing things on the opposite wall. The new teacher looked that way and said "That was very respectful." I told her I didn't see and she said Robin crawled under the table the projecter was on so he wouldn't cast a shadow on what the kids were working on. Now, I think any other teacher would have just seen a child crawling and goofing off. She paid attention to why he was doing what he was doing. I think this probably will be a good placement for him. She also said the first thing they work on is communication. He really needs that. Thanx again for all the support.

By Cat on Friday, November 14, 2003 - 11:29 am:

A little update.

I just talked to transportation and Robin will be on the bus for about 20 minutes in the morning and about 25 minutes in the afternoon. Not as bad as we thought.

By Bobbie on Saturday, November 15, 2003 - 09:21 am:

Cat that is good news...

By Lauram on Saturday, November 15, 2003 - 03:59 pm:

That's good that the bus ride is shorter. I'm not sure that legally they are doing the wrong thing though. I just wanted to mention that. If they were forcing him to stay in his school and not servicing his needs, then they would be acting illegally. In my district this happens frequently with kids with extreme needs. The next step is out of district placement. It's when the district drags their feet that you have a legal edge. I hope this works out for him! BTW- what did they label him? SED? OHI? Does he have learning issues as well?

By Cat on Saturday, November 15, 2003 - 07:12 pm:

His official label is SIED and no, he doesn't have any learning problems other than not wanting to do the work. He's an incredibly bright kid. Classic underachiever. As far as them acting legally or not, I just think they didn't do everything they could have where he was. Reading through the IEP they sure covered their butts, though. Like I said, hopefully this is the right decision.

By Bobbie on Saturday, November 15, 2003 - 10:09 pm:

Cat anything but sitting on your hands is the right decision. And I think he will do well with the smaller class size. After dealing with Bipolar all these years. I can tell you that I am sure he is having mini issues through out the day that are building into a huge issue. And with the teacher not being able to focus on him and put out the small fires as they occur he is having a ragging fire before it is brought to the attention of the teacher. Where as in the smaller class setting the teacher and aid will with time start picking up on his triggers and will there to help him learn to deal with the issues before the fire starts. I just really think this is a very good idea and that you should run with it. Get involved and try to stay constant at home and in school. Something you couldn't do with a teacher trying to control a class room of probably 20 plus students. Kind of sounds like Robin might have only gotten the attention when he was loosing it.

By Conni on Sunday, November 16, 2003 - 06:07 pm:

Ditto what Bobbie said!!