Okay.. Here's the situation. My ds has been waking up earlier and earlier and/or refuse to go back down w/out nursing. B/c I work during the day, I try to give him the closeness by nursing at night before he sleeps and at least once in the middle of the night if he wakes. DH will usually handle the other feeding with a bottle of formula in wee hours of night and put him back in bed. The thing is, sometimes ds wakes 2 times at night, sometiems he's awake every other hour! Before he sleeps for the night, we put this relaxing CD music on for him and he snuggles with us and leans towards his crib to signal that he's ready to lay down. As long as the music plays..he's fine. When he wakes in the wee hours of the night and won’t go back to sleep (with or without music) he will keep crying and screaming.. which I don’t want to do- I can’t shake the feeling of selfishness and guiltiness that just b/c it is 3am and I’m tired, that he should CIO and learn his lesson. DH says to let him CIO so that he’ll learn..but I just can’t do it. (Of course..DH is also back asleep as soon as he finishes the statement..) The only thing left to do is: 1) rock him until he sleeps—anywhere from 30min to 1 ½ hr.. or 2) nurse him to sleep with him next to me in bed. (It’s not that ds just wants to sleep with me..b/c I’ve tried just snuggling with him in bed to sleep, but he refuses and sits up and gets mad until I give him ‘the goods’.) DH and I both have schedules that requires us wake by 6am to get out the door by 6:30am.. so therefore the kids wake up early as well. (Don’t get me started on dealing with other sleep issues on weekends when DH complains we have to get up at 6am still b/c the kids’ are used to it from the week’s schedule) The thing is, I know that it’s normal for ds to wake b/c his internal clock is used to the 6am schedule.. but it has gotten earlier..and earlier..and it’s now at 4am??!! What do I do?

By Mommyathome on Friday, October 24, 2003 - 05:50 pm:

I'm totally w/you on the DH thing. My DH can sleep through a crying baby for hours. We actually did the CIO thing with my 2nd and 3rd babies right about 10-12 months of age. With my first, we let it go on for way to long. She was over a year and we were still getting up with her several times a night. Our doctor gave use his *personal, not medical* advice to let her CIO. It worked. Within 3 days she was on a normal sleep schedule. So, with my next 2 kids, we started the process a lot earlier LOL.

By Sunny on Friday, October 24, 2003 - 08:30 pm:

Why not bring him to bed with you at night? I'm not a fan of CIO, but I know there are times when it seems like the only solution. I tried it once with my oldest and decided it wasn't for me. Instead, I brought him to bed with me; it's the only way I could get any rest. With the rest of my kids, I brought them in my bed from day one ( and never looked back! ) I am still nursing and co-sleeping with my youngest (15 months).

By Kate on Friday, October 24, 2003 - 08:40 pm:

What is CIO???

By Sunny on Friday, October 24, 2003 - 08:49 pm:

CIO - Crying it Out

By Battykatty on Friday, October 24, 2003 - 09:42 pm:

Sunny, I did bring him to bed with me in the earlier months. In fact (this may seem extreme to some, but I'm okay with it) I set up a bed in ds room where I slept with him for 6 months so that he'd know it was his room but still feel safe and comfortable there. (DH and I joke "Already sleeping in separate quarters at the tender year of 5 yrs of marriage?!) But, he was sleeping with DD in our big kingsize bed.. It's an odd arrangement, but our kids are happy. DH and I did the family bed thing with DD when she was born until she was about 2 1/2 yrs..which she slept in her toddler bed at the foot of our bed and still climbs up into our bed in middle of night. I would LOVE to sleep with my dk every night b/c it is really the only way that I feel COMPLETELY safe and relaxed knowing that they are next to me. (Can you say..N-E-U-R-O-T-I-C). DH does not want to go through what we went thru with dd which is she has hard time falling asleep on her own. He's very particular about 'his unwind' time. Don't misread though--he's a wonderful dad.
I just don't want to be a sleep-aid to my ds..or rather, I don't want be a human pacifier. DS does not take pacifiers or suck his thumb-gag reflex on anything artificial. He's a true boy through and through!
Sorry to post such long threads..I just feel as if I've found kindred spirits to release my worries and thoughts that hasn't had a decent outlet..
TIA for your views and listening.