Help!!! ds wetting his pants at school
Moms View Message Board: Parenting Discussion: Archive July-December 2003:
Help!!! ds wetting his pants at school
I want to start off by saying that I don't know what I am looking for in this post. My ds is in full day kindergarten. He came home wet a few weeks ago. He wet his pants and didn't tell anyone and hide it for part of the day. We had a long talk about how accidents happen, but it is not acceptable to sit in wet clothes all day. He does have a change of clothes in his backpack, so he needs to quietly tell his teacher so he can change. I agreed not to say anything to his teacher because he was very embarrassed. He is a very shy/reserved kid. Well, the last two days he has come home wet. I am really suprised that no one at school notices. I can tell the minute he walks in the door. We are going through a lot right now. We are moving out of state soon, the house is up for sell and dh is already at his new job(so he is gone). I am stressed to the max and by the way my other ds(he is 3) is acting, so is he. I am not sure if it is stress, if he is too shy to raise his hand to go to the bathroom, or what. He doesn't want to talk about it and he doesn't want me to tell his teacher. I told him I would think about things and we would talk later. Okay, feedback please. What should I do??? He was in preschool for 2 years before this and never had a problem. I am not real sure what is going on. Could it be a bladder infection?? I just don't know. I do know that I am going to have to talk with his teacher if it keeps happening. But does anyone have any suggestions to put a stop to it?? Has anyone else gone through this?? Thanks for all our help.
It's definitely time to tell the teacher. Write her a note or call her, but tell her it's become a problem and that you think it's due to the major changes going on at home. I'm sure she'll understand. At any rate, you need to solicit her help in having your DS use the bathroom maybe once in the morning and once in the afternoon. She's just going to have to quietly tell him he needs to use the bathroom now. Tell your DS that it would be far more embarrassing that the KIDS know, and that they will if he keeps wetting and hiding it. If the teacher can remind him to go, he can hopefully avoid accidents and then the kids won't have to know.
I think you should talk to the teacher either by phone or in person. Maybe she can help remind him a few times a day to take a break and use the restroom. (she could do it privately, not announce it in class) They do make pull ups for bigger kids. Maybe he could try those for a day or two. That may be an incentive for him to remember to potty when he needs too, so he can wear his regular underpants again. Sometimes accidents are caused by Urinary tract infections too. If it continues, check with your doctor too. It's very possible that it is caused by the stress in his life right now. My nephew had that problem. (((hugs)))
I was thinking about Pull-ups, too. He is probably stressed out over the move. It would just be a temporary thing. Although, maybe having the teacher remind him once in a while wouldn't hurt, either.
I would let the teacher know whats going on!! Poor little guy. I hope this move goes quickly and smoothly for you Debbie. Tell your ds you know a lady that got spanked by a mean principal in front of alllll the 'walkers' after school one day. AND she got sooo embarrassed/scared she pee'd her pants right there and had to walk home all wet and gooshy. Yep, happened on March 23, 1979 at around 2:45pm... lol (i dont remember the date-- but boy do I remember how bad I felt!!)
Oh, that's really sad, Connie. What had you done? How humiliating!
Former K teacher here... Definitely talk with the teacher. This isn't unusual in K. The teacher can make a point of having your DS visit the bathroom more often. Poor kiddo! Sounds like he's stressing out from everything that's going on concerning the move.
I also say, tell the teacher, just don't do it in front of your ds or he will be all the more embarassed. Definitely let her know about all the stress and changes going on at home. I'm sure she has had to deal with this problem before and she will probably know what to do. I have a friend who's ds had this problem, but it was because he was too shy to let the teacher know he had to use the bathroom and his teacher set up bathroom breaks for all the kids a couple of times during the day and she would line the kids up and take them all at once so that way no one was singled out and he didn't have to ask to use the bathroom. Problem solved. Good luck to your ds!
Ditto what Trina says. Totally common. Let the teacher know so she can look at his bottom. She needs to be tuned into it- especially if he's not speaking up. Sometimes accidents happen on the bus on the way home- are you sure it happened at school?
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