I know that I'm considerably older than a lot of you, and raised a daughter in a different time. However, is it me, or are the clothes that they are selling for little girls today,inappropriate? DH, the boys, and I went to our county fair last Saturday. There were groups of kids hanging out together. Some of the girls only looked to be 12, 13, 14. They had these skimpy little camisole tops, with the 'spaghetti straps', and SHORT shorts! And what's with the writing on the back of the shorts? Some had skin tight hip-hugger jeans. One girl had a shirt on that said "sixty nine". Don't the parents CARE what they wear? For that matter, some of the boys wore t-shirts with VERY inappropriate sayings on them. Down right OFFENSIVE> "In my day", you could even be ARRESTED for wearing something like that in public!
Also, my Mom was a school teacher when I was a kid. We had dress codes for school, and strict ones. When we would complain, my Mom would say that people ACT the way they dress. She was right, if what we saw last weekend was any indication. The girls and boys, of the 12 to 14 group, were smoking cigarettes, and throwing the "F" word around, like it was nothing.
I was also in Old Navy buying school clothes for my ds's, and we walked thru the toddler section. They had the same skimpy, short shorts and camisoles for LITTLE girls! Come on!! Can't we let kids be kids??!
Like I said, I'm probably a dinosaur compared to most of you, but there don't seem to be any STANDARDS anymore! What's next?

By Marcia on Saturday, August 23, 2003 - 11:19 pm:

My girls have cute short sets with words on the butt - soccer, trouble, dance, etc. Nothing rude. They wear clothes that suit their ages. (7,8,9,10 and 20) They do have shirts with spaghetti straps, but they're just little summer t's. Nothing sleezy about them. No low cut jeans, because I think they look like crap. I know there's lots of innapropriate stuff out there, but we stay away from it. I want them to be little girls for as long as they can be.

By Mommmie on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 12:10 am:

I don't have a girl, but my friends with girls say it is difficult to find clothes that is NOT in this fashion you describe.

I look at the inserts that come in the paper advertising back to school clothes and a whole bunch of the clothes in the ads are not even allowed in the schools bec of dress codes. No exposed middles, no spaghetti straps, no baggie jeans on boys, for example, and there it is advertised as back to school clothes!

By Boxzgrl on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 12:47 am:

I definitely agree. Girls clothes are getting smaller and more profane as the years come and go. I cant say much because I probably fell in that category for a while. And its all about the sexual image. What sexual image can a 12 year old girl have anyways??? I can only imagine what will be "cool" when DD is that age. God help us......

By Hol on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 01:12 am:

Laura, you're lucky that you live where the public schools HAVE dress codes. Here, on the liberal East Coast, dress codes in public schools are considered a violation of civil rights!

By Dawnk777 on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 02:54 am:

This drives me nuts! I hate that my 14 yo's tummy always shows! She will have to be more modest once school starts. She knows that, too. I bought some shorts for her that ended up being really short. She already knows she won't be wearing them to school. It is harder to find modest clothes in the junior sizes. Not every kid wants to dress like that. Neither one of my daughters likes the shirts with the rude sayings on them. They don't even like the ones that say "Princess" on them! LOL!

By Lauram on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 07:48 am:

Totally inappropriate. I'm actually having trouble finding good clothes for my first grade (size 8). So much has totally inappropriate decals on it (devil worshipping type) or is just plain cheesy.

By Dana on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 08:14 am:

I totally agree. Thankfully, we are required to wear standard uniforms at DDs public school.

Also, I am lucky that she is still small, so we can still shop in the toddlers area. I must say that once we leave the "T" sizes, the choices are already getting a bit "slutty". It's going to be difficult to say the least as she grows.

This is not the first time I have seen this conversation. And always, there are many of us moms saying we want more traditional styles for our children (esp girls). If this is so, and it is our buying power that dictates the styles (at least that is what I hear) WHY OH WHY are there still so vew choices out there?

By Ginnyk on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 08:27 am:

Personally, I think the clothes for little girls, adolescents and teens (and often for women) are sluttish. I don't see any reason why schoolgirls should be showing their midriffs or wearing skin-tight short-short skirts or shorts unless they are being filmed for a rock video. I will admit, I have no daughters, but if I had I would never allow them to wear such clothes. Nor would I allow pants or clothes with words on them, even harmless ones - the words and decals are intended to draw attention to the "sexy" parts of a girl's body - her breasts, backside, midriff, etc. - that is the only reason for putting them in such places and making them prominent. I belive very strongly that the way a girl dresses should not make her a target for molestation, any more than a man in a Brooks Brothers suit in a poor neighborhood would be considered to be "asking for it" if he were robbed. Nonetheless, I think girls and women should dress with a certain amount of modesty, and leave some things to a man's imagination instead of laying it all out on the cafeteria counter. What I see at Target, Kmart, Penney's, Sears, Macy's, etc, is appalling, imo.

Philadelphia recently started a uniform/dress code for public schools. Mostly, I think, to prevent the kind of hassling that goes on when a kid isn't wearing the fashionable stuff, and also to help prevent kids being literally robbed of the clothes they are wearing.

I also get frustrated with what is being sold as "office" clothes - with spandex leaving nothing underneath to the imagination, slits up to there, skirts that look like slips, sheer and semi-sheer, etc. And those long skirts with one, two, three or more slits. As a feminist, I was one who fought to have women considered to be equal and to not be objects of sexual attention in the workplace - clothes like these are, in my opinion, intended to draw attention to women as sexual objects and have no place in the office. It is really hard to find anything else, though, unless you shop the catalogs and mostly sportswear catalogs like Lands End, etc.

Personally, I won't buy clothes which display the manufacturer's name or logo on the outside. If you want me to advertise your product, you should pay me, not me buying the advertising from you, imo. When we bought our car, I made sure that I added to the purchase contract "no seller's advertising, name or logo is to be placed on the vehicle". When I had the car repainted at Maaco several years later, they replaced my license plate holder with one advertising Maaco and I made them take it off and put on a plain one before I paid them.

By Kaye on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 09:05 am:

I hate the shorts with writing on them. Pretty much for the reason ginny mention. Plain and simple, the writing is there so people look at their butt! Dont' look at my daughters butt! Now for an older high schooler, college age girl, she is trying to find a boy, so maybe that isn't so bad! I buy traditional, we have a couple of spaghetti strap shirts, but only because we live in the armpit of america (houston) and you just have to keep cool. But I don't let her wear those ribbed tight shirts...YIKES!

By Karen55 on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 09:53 am:

I'm sort of in the middle on this one. First of all, for school clothes, I do agree that certain things are inappropriate and are, in fact, a distraction. Almost all of the public schools in Louisiana have gone to mandatory uniforms for students. Years ago they had all the parents vote for or against this, before it was actually implemented, and my kids were furious with me because I voted FOR it. But even before uniforms, our schools did not allow sleeveless shirts, tank tops, shirts with profanity, etc., bellies showing, etc.

I do agree that girls are beginning to wear skimpier things at younger ages, and it's up to the parents to control that. I see nothing wrong with spaghetti strap tops on girls in the summer, and low cut jeans/pants with proper tops look nice.

However, there's a difference between slutty and tasteful, and unfortunately, some people seem to not know the difference, or just don't care.

I grew up when halter tops and P-nut jeans were in fashion. That's what we wore (outside of school - in school the dress code was very strict). We wore shirts that showed our tummies and I never gave it a second thought, and to be honest, I don't think anyone I knew did either.

But I have to say that now, 30 years later, sex is used to sell literally everything, from makeup to clothes to cars to food - and it's reflected in the clothing styles, even for todders. I've seen outfits for little girls that look like something Madonna wore 15 years ago.

Bottom line is, parents *should* have control over what their kids are wearing, certainly over what 12, 13 and 14 y/o are wearing. If people don't buy the crap that's out there, then designers/manufacturers/retailers will take a loss and have to supply something else.

I'm one of those *pick your battle* parents, and when it came to experimenting with hair color, or wearing some styles that I personally thought looked ridiculous, I let mine give it a try. I'm NOT talking about slutty, revealing clothes though, that's where I drew the line.

By Bobbie on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 10:04 am:

It is hard to by clothing for girls. My kids all have dress codes at their schools and I am not kidding when I say atleast 75% of what they sell is not something they would be aloud to wear. DD has spaghetti strap tanks but I buy them a size to big so her belly is coverd and her Boobs aren't hanging out. She has a few shirts with sayings but she wears them at home only. When I was a kid we could buy just plain T-shirts and just plain jeans. You are hell pressed to find these things for any age group. The are either belly shirts or they have sayings or they are just plain ugly. And jeans are low rise, have designs, or are just plain ugly. And another thing... Dressy clothes come in one style. Sheer...... And Shorts DD is 5'7 and it is hard to buy shorts for her. Everything seems to be too short. We shop and shop and might find one or two pairs. I agree if we are the power behind the designs then what happend to the cute little outfits they sold for little girls?? The girls department could easly be mistaken for the womens. And I am really concernd over what will be the "fashion" when dd's (6yr) are in high school. So Hol It is not just you....

By Boxzgrl on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 11:39 am:

Bobbie, I know exactly what your talking about with shorts. I'm 5'8" and I cant remember the last time I bought a pair of shorts that were long enough. Its virtually inpossible!!! I dont really shop in the womens dept. yet because i'm a size 5 so most of the clothes that fit me are in the teen area. Poor me, no wonder why I never go shopping. I've actuaaly bought some "normal" looking clothes at Old Navy and their prices are great too. And actually I think I have bought a few shirts out of the Lands End catalog too. There are clothes out there, it just takes forever to find them! This is why I love winter, I can stick to jeans and a comfy cashmere sweater. I've always loved winter trends.

By Hol on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 04:29 pm:

DH and I picked one of our ds's up at HS one afternoon, and watched "the show" as school let out. First, they all spilled out the door and pulled out their cellphones, like they hadn't heard a human voice in a year! LOL. Since it is a non-smoking campus, the smokers gathered accross the street. Then we observed the styles. One girl had a short, SHORT mini-skirt on, and big platform shoes. Dh said,"If she doesn't fall off her shoes and break her leg, how does she SIT DOWN in that skirt?" He also said that it would be very difficult to concentrate on school work, as a teenaged boy.
Some of the boys had jeans on that looked like a size 40 waist. They were hanging off them. The top of their boxers showed. And what's with "the pimp walk", as DH calls it? LOL. One of our ds's is VERY thin, and almost EVERY pair of jeans hangs off him, but we try to buy them to fit. He has a 28 waist, and it's getting hard to find them. The smallest I can find in some stores is 32. DH says that's because they all want them baggy. Again, thank goodness for Old Navy. The prices ARE great, and the stuff holds up.
I agree on the office wear for women. I am a SAHM now since our boys came to us, but when I was working outside the home, it was difficult to find just nice, conservative attire.
Oh, and a MAJOR fashion pet peeve of mine is grown men wearing sweatpants in public! GROSS! LOL

By Karen55 on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 04:51 pm:

Well, then, you don't want to see my DH at the grocery store........he loves his sweatpants. :-)

By My2girlygirls on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 07:46 pm:

Am I the only one appalled by the new Joe Boxer ads in the Kmart ads? Why does a child need a bathing suit, underwear, or a bra with a face with the tongue sticking out of it's mouth? Hello! I don't get offended too easily but I saw a Kmart ad recently that was a young (maybe 10 yr. old) girl with Joe Boxer underwear on and the tongue was sticking out of it's mouth. Hello, it's a kid. If you haven't noticed, look at the ads sometime. I won't shop there now, it just really offended me.

By Mommmie on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 09:12 pm:

Did you see the Seinfeld episode about wearing sweartpants in public?? Too funny!

About the clothes - even with our dress codes, the kids push it as far as they can. I drive past a junior high on the way to my son's private school and it is a world of difference between those boys' barely hanging on jeans and exposed boxers and my son's fitted khaki's, tucked-in button down pin stripped shirt, and belt. I was not looking forward to the uniform part of his school, but now I see the benefit. Still I think the moms of girls have a much bigger war to battle...

By Bobbie on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 09:13 pm:

LOL about the platform shoes. I was talking to one of the ladies I go to church with her DS is a sophmore this year. He was telling her about how hard the girls make it for the boys to concentrate. That they come to school with everything showing. And what isn't acutally hanging out is in something so tight there is no need for an imagination.

By Pamt on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 09:55 pm:

I totally agree about the whole clothing thing. I couldn't buy any shorts this year because I couldn't find any long enough that came at least to mid-thigh. And I refuse to wear low rider jeans because they are (a)uncomfortable (b)don't want to show my belly, I'm 35 thank you very much and (c)I don't think they are figure flattering to ANYONE. They make girls and women look straight and thick, not like they have a waist at all. I have 2 boys, so I don't have to worry *as much* about clothes and they do wear uniforms to school. My dh and I laugh though because this K-12 school has sweats with the school logo as an acceptable uniform in the winter and fall. HIgh school boys in sweat pants...not a pretty thing and very risky too, if you get my drift.

As for the girls...my dh is a youth minister and I teach 9th and 10th grade girls in Sunday school and have a weekly Bible study in my home with a small group of sophomores-seniors in high school. I am around teen girls alot. These girls are for the most part wholesome girls who dress fairly conservatively with the exception of the occasional short skirt/shorts, and tight or midriff-baring top. I have talked to them often about how they can dress fashionably without being slutty. I was explaining to them have visually excitable males are, esp. teenaged boys at their sexual peak. I was telling them how frequently guys have erections simply from looking a pretty girl, much less one dressed provactively. They were flabbergasted! They couldn't believe that "nice boys" (yes, even their brothers, dads, best guy friends, etc.) would dare think about, notice, or definitely not be aroused just by looking at a girl. I had to explain to them that that's just how guys are wired and it was part of their responsibility not to make life harder or more frustrating on these guys than necessary. That brought a whole new light to how they dressed and I think they take it a *little* more seriously now. (although I still don't think they realize how guys always have sex on the brain)

By Hol on Sunday, August 24, 2003 - 11:44 pm:

Sarah- I TOTALLY agree about the Joe Boxer underwear. I had never heard of it. However, last August, when our two adoptive sons moved in with us, the older one had the boxer shorts with the big tongue right in the crotch area. He was 14 at the time. Both boys lived in a group home prior to moving in with us. The staff at the home are usually pretty conservative. (They HAVE to be). Since they shop for the kids, I was surprised to see those boxers. They looked like a gag gift that you'd buy for your dh for Valentines Day. Certainly not appropriate for horny teenaged boys.

By Jtw on Monday, August 25, 2003 - 12:41 am:

Hol, you are not a dinosaur!!! I am only 26, and I totally agree! I never wore those kind of clothes. Personally I think that girls who dress like that are advertising themselves. Why would you dress like that unless you wanted everyone looking at you? Recently DH and I were driving through downtown Minneapolis on a Friday night. I was appalled at the way these women looked. Most of them were probably my age or younger, and they all had on mini-skirts, halter tops, skin tight leather outfits, and pretty much any other slutty outfit you can imagine. My Dh (who is also 26) said, "Well, I know what those girls want." ICK. As for the younger girls, they are only trying to imitate what they see older "women" wearing because they think they look grown up. It is really sad that girls and women in our society have such little self respect that they think that they need to dress trampy to get attention. By the way, I am not at all a big feminist, but this really bugs me! I agree with Ginny about the objects of sexual attention. Do we really want that to be the kind of attention our dd's are getting? NO!

By Anonymous on Monday, August 25, 2003 - 09:43 am:

I am glad I am not the only one that feels this way. Of course I am a Mom to all boys. My 6th grader has had girls calling him since 4th grade. I mean in the middle of the night, on their mom's cell phone, on a school night? Of course I put a stop to it. And explained to my ds that it wasnt the girls fault, its her parents fault for not setting any boundaries. Funny thing is, he agreed with me.

I totally agree it is up to the parents to teach their dd's and ds' some self respect. Teach them how to dress appropriately and behave appropriately. It is also a matter of respecting others-- why make other people feel uncomfortable because you are half dressed?? Not everyone wants to see you.

I remember visiting my sil's house the first couple of times. Keep in mind her dh is a preacher. She says to me (about her teenage dd's) 'My girls arent modest, so dont be embarrassed if they walk thru the house with no clothes on.' I reallllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy bit my tongue as it wasnt my home. lol My BOYS havent been back since. ;) They did walk thru the house in their towels and bras. One of her dd's walked out the door for CHURCH in a skirt that literally barely covered her butt cheeks. My Dad would have sent me back to my room to find something more appropriate for church. Here is the irony... they arent allowed to be in cheerleading because the outfits are skimpy? LOL! Whatever. Her dh ended up having some sexual problems that had to do with teenage girls, and they are now divorced. I remember my mil saying 'If I had a body like (16yr old granddaughter) hers I'd flaunt it too.' yuk! What a mature thing to tell your granddaughters. By the time I was 10 yrs old, I wasnt allowed to walk thru the house without my robe on, or I had to be dressed. And it was all girls at my house no brothers. If we had company we were taught NOT to leave the bathroom without our robe.

There are alot of stores that do sell some classic nice clothes for kids. But I guess I havent really been shopping for girls clothes. lol I did get my niece a really cute outfit for her birthday, at Dillards, that wasnt skimpy.

Ok thats my 2 cents. I better go anon, in case any family reads this post.

By Mommyathome on Monday, August 25, 2003 - 02:47 pm:

I agree, there are lots of "little girls" out there wearing things that are very innapropriate IMO. And, caking on the make up doesn't help the look at all either.

My DD's also have flare leg sweats with writing on the bum. One of them says "star", the other says "princess". I am looking for a pair that say "dance". I think they are in good taste and not offensive. They also have some "spaghetti strap" t's that they wear in the summer. They don't show the belly and aren't real tight around their chest. (as if they have a chest lol, they are 5 and 4)

I won't put them in "daisy duke" shorts or skirts that are really short. I like the shorts to hit them about 1/2 way between their knees and the top of their legs. No belly button shirts. We definitely don't buy them offensive shirts. The shirts that say "brat" on them drive me nuts. I won't ever buy them one of those. And, the bratz girls line of clothes isn't on the top of my list either. I don't like the way that they dress.

I feel like I dress my kids modestly for their age and that the clothes they wear are appropriate for them.

Anyway, there is my input

By Beth on Monday, August 25, 2003 - 03:02 pm:

My dd is 2 and I have already noticed this also. I usually by things at JcPenney and its not to bad there. But some of these specialty shops is where I think it is the worse. I am dreading as she gets older.

By Bellajoe on Monday, August 25, 2003 - 03:19 pm:

Have you seen the underwear they have for little girls too? They are supposed to be sexy. They are silky string panties!! That is just wrong. Little girls are not supposed to be sexy. They are KIDS!

Imo, There is nothing wrong with the spaghetti strap shirts for girls as long as it fits them and covers their bellys. Heck, it's HOT out side, i wear them! LOL

Robin, i am with you on the Bratz stuff. I do not need my dd to wear a shirt that says "brat" on it. And whats up with those dolls?

By Susan10 on Tuesday, August 26, 2003 - 12:56 am:

I agree with all of the above, especially about the underwear. Here's another pet peeve for those of you who have daughters that dance and can relate. Maybe this bugs others, too. What's with the Las Vegas showgirl costumes on 7 year olds? It makes me nuts. They wear these little crop tops with fringe and leather mini skirts and then they do these hootchie-kootchie dances. It's so wrong. If you're a pedophile the best place to be is a dance competition. I've written a lot of letters but it's just way too prevelant. Shouldn't little girls be dressed like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, or in a raincoat with umbrella, or something cute like that...not like a hooker?

By Bobbie on Tuesday, August 26, 2003 - 07:09 am:

LOL Susan. Agreed. DD was in the 8th grade last year. The girls actually wore thongs. DD was still wearing fruit of the loom. LOL. I did buy her nice bra and panty sets this year though. But she is fully coverd. She will be a freshman and I remember having to dress out in "granny" panties and an old woman bra for Gym. I hated it. And won't do that to my child. I have seen thongs for children at a novilty shop at the mall. WHO buys those and WHY?

By Conni on Tuesday, August 26, 2003 - 11:00 am:

I dont have girls so have not seen the thongs for girls. That is really sick. Yuk!

And we dont do dance competitions either. I had no idea. That's pretty sad as well.

By Juli4 on Tuesday, August 26, 2003 - 10:38 pm:

I went and was looking at wal-mart for some clothes for my 2 year old. She wears size 4 in dresses, but I have been looking for larger sizes becuase she grows out of them so quick and could not find clothes that I considered appropriate for little girls. They expanded their Mary Kate and Ashely line and a lot of their stuff I do not like at all. I do not dress my daughter in backless shirts and short shorts and so on. I admit I am a bit more conservative than most especially in summer but I agree I would like to see them dress little girls as little girls.

By Dawnk777 on Wednesday, August 27, 2003 - 10:34 pm:

My kids think the Mary Kate and Ashley clothes are ugly! They wouldn't be seen in it! I think the colors are ugly and the styles not that flattering. Yuck!

Kohl's Department Stores in WI have very cute toddler and 4-6 clothes! I'm sad I can't buy those anymore. I don't have a problem with the 14yo because she doesn't want to wear revealing clothes herself. I end up buying most of her clothes at Kohls because they have attractive clothes for Juniors and they have a mix of clothes that are revealing and some that are more modest.

By Jtw on Thursday, August 28, 2003 - 01:51 am:

Here is something funny, one of our news channels had a story about this last night. Seems that us "dinosaurs" aren't the only ones who feel this way. Lots of teen girls think it is totally inappropriate too. Not to mention that lots of schools are banning these type of clothes. Sounds like manufacturers need to start listening to the consumer instead of trying to tell us what we want.
P.S. Thongs - major snuggy! Why would you make a little kid wear underwear that causes that problem? They definitely don't need to picking around down there all day. Gross! Even I don't wear those beacuse of that.

By Dawnk777 on Thursday, August 28, 2003 - 07:00 pm:

When I started working at the clinic a year ago, I was specifically told by my boss that thong underwear was not allowed. I think that white pants would show the lack of coverage over the butt cheeks and that is why. I don't have the body for thongs and don't think I would like my underwear where thong underwear ends up! Eww.

By Bobbie on Thursday, August 28, 2003 - 10:34 pm:

LOL about the thong underwear. We have some moms on the list that LOVE them... (I will add that I am not one of them)

I will say that probably about 3/4 of the stuff you see in the store is not something a child can wear to school. No belly, no but and no boobs. They aren't aloud to wear tanks of any sort. So the selections are limited. Which means that every other kid you go to school with has the same outfit. Nice... Not cool when you are 13/14 years old. And you buy a shirt that fits right and throw on a pair of low rise jeans and what do you get??? A belly hanging out and a banned outfit...

By Karen~moderator on Friday, August 29, 2003 - 09:39 am:

I'm one of them. Should I be embarrassed? LOL

However, I would NOT buy them for a young child. Jen wears them, but she is 18 now.

By Bobbie on Friday, August 29, 2003 - 10:45 pm:

Yes you should be very very embarrassed... After all you are BARE A**ED so it fits you well. LOL

By Ginny~moderator on Saturday, August 30, 2003 - 07:09 pm:

Kaye, I was just re-reading your post, and your comment, about shorts with writing on the backside: for an older high schooler, college age girl, she is trying to find a boy, so maybe that isn't so bad!

I understand what you are saying, but my reaction is that if the reason a boy notices a girl is because of what is written on her backside, is this really a guy she wants to find?

Honestly, the way so many young women dress today, they are not marketing themselves as potential wife material - but rather as potential one-night-stand material - imo.

It took me a long, long time to convince my youngest that if you dress to give a certain image, that is exactly how people will perceive you. He spent a long time dressing in combat boots, fatigues, army type shirts, with a chain in his belt loops (but only after he moved out - I wouldn't tolerate it while he lived with me). And then he'd be surprised if shopkeepers treated him with suspicion. Thank whatever moved him to change, he did change, and now dresses appropriately for his job and whatever else he is doing, and nothing visually outstanding in any way (as long as he keeps his shirt on to cover his tatoos - a whole other story!).