I'm writing invitations for DD's 5th birthday party and am tempted to add, "Parents VERY welcome to stay." DD wants to invite her entire class (10 students) and the party will be held at our house without any professional help. I would appreciate parents staying to supervise their kids. The reason I'm concerned is because DD and I attended a party for one of her class mates last week. Four children were simply dropped off. No surprise, those four children were the most challenging behaviorally in the class! They were disruptive and made things very difficult for the hostess and the hired staff who were running the party. I don't want the same thing to happen at my house! As it is with all the planning and preparations, I don't want to be a free baby-sitter on top of it all. Would it be proper to encourage parents to attend? Am I asking too much? I always attend parties with my kids and help supervise and clean up. Any advice and/or suggestions would be appreciated. TIA!

By Karen55 on Wednesday, May 21, 2003 - 10:17 pm:

At that age, I don't see a problem with extending the invitation to parents too. When my kids were that age, usually 3 or 4 of the parents would stick around for the parties. Fortunately we never really had problems with kids not behaving, and I really appreciated those few parents helping out. I say go for it, and I like the way you worded it above. :-)

By Palmbchprincess on Wednesday, May 21, 2003 - 11:17 pm:

I would put "Parents are welcome to stay and enjoy the festivities!!" and offer coffee or something when the parents arrive with the children to encourage them sticking around. I personally wouldn't drop my kids off at a party at such a young age... but that's just me.

By Semperspencer on Wednesday, May 21, 2003 - 11:37 pm:

I read this post, and thought you had said she was in fifth grade...

But turning FIVE! If I were a parent I would stay for the party, to both help out and to keep a good eye on my child.

I suggest you do as you mentioned and I agree with Crystal, offer food and beverages to the parents and engage them in conversation to hint around for them to stay...

By Tunnia on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 08:01 am:

You can address the envelopes to the child and his/her mom (ex. Child and Mrs. Whatsthename, 123 any street, any town, state, 00000) and then put a line on the invitation that says something like "We would be so pleased to have you both attend" or "we can't wait to see you both". That way it takes the option out of staying and replaces it with a polite request for attendance. Have drinks and snacks for the parents (coffee, tea, veggies and dip, fruits, etc) so that they feel like they were invited to the party to celebrate instead of just making sure their kid behaves. Have a great party!

By Semperspencer on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 03:07 pm:

EXCELLENT advice Tunia!

By Melanie on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 04:15 pm:

Absolutely include that line, Trina! There is nothing wrong with encouraging parents to stay. I think most will understand completely!

By Mommyathome on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 10:49 pm:

I also think they would understand. If my DD received that on an invitation I would get the point ;)

I like the ideas about having a seperate little deal for the parents. Seperate foods and drinks is a good idea.

We, however are on the other end I guess lol. My DD's ages 4 (almost 5) and 3 go to parties where parents, including myself, don't stay. The parties are usually 5-7 kids and we all just drop the kids off and pick them up an hour later. My DD will be having her first "friends" birthday party (up until now we've just done extended family and a couple friends w/their families) I won't be inviting the parents to stay, but they are more than welcome if they feel like they want to.

One thing that could be different in our situation is that we are all pretty close, we go to the same church, live in the same neighborhood, and we know everyone very well. I wouldn't however drop my child off at someones house that I didn't know well. Not at age 5 anyway.

Have a fun party. Ours will be coming up next week!

By Colette on Thursday, May 22, 2003 - 10:56 pm:

I think that would be fine Trina. I would prefer to attend a bday party w/my kindergartener than to be expected to drop her off.

By Vicki on Friday, May 23, 2003 - 07:44 pm:

I also think that it is fine to invite the parents to stay. Just one word of caution. If you want the parents to stay, you are also opening the door for siblings to come with the parent. You need to either decide to buy a few extra treat bags etc for them, or decide to not include them. It can be a sticky situation!!

By Paulas on Saturday, May 24, 2003 - 03:41 pm:

I, too, think that would be fine. Personally, I'm under the belief that how ever old you are, that's how many kids can come. But, that's just me. Around here many parents just drop off their children and I don't want to supervise that many kids.

This year, DD is only having three kids b/c that's all that will fit into our van. We are going swimming and to a restaurant while the movers load the moving van. Only three extra kids is just fine with me.