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Moms View Message Board: Parenting Children with Special Needs: A Question for Parents of Children with ADHD
I am interested in knowing how young your child was when you began to suspect that he or she might have some component of ADHD. I am particularly interested in knowing about the hyperactive component of the disorder. Exactly how did it present itself in your child, and when did you start to suspect that it was something more than just behavior indicative of a very active, energetic child?
Joan, my DS does not have the hyperactive component of ADHD, just the inattentive type, which I began to suspect at the age of 8 when helping him study. I know this is not what you're looking for, but that's an excellent question. Hope someone else comes along to shed some light on their experience.
My 10yo has always been extreamly active. He pulled himself up at 4 months, crawled at 6 months, walked at 10 months and climbed out of his crib at 11 months. He was climbing gates at 18 months. He kept me VERY busy! lol He even climbed over our chain link fence when he was 2. My parents and grandma were visiting at the time and he totally shocked my grandma with that one! The amazing thing is, most active/hyperactive kids don't sleep much, which ds doesn't now, but as a baby/toddler, he would go to bed at 8pm and sleep until 8am, plus take a 2-3 hour nap every day until he was 2 1/2. Now of course, we have to give him clonidine to help him get to sleep and it's still usually 9 at the very earliest (midnight if we don't give him meds) and he's up at 7am at the latest. But he's always been a very busy kid. He was constantly into everything. He figured out child locks at 18 months and even hook and eyes on closets wouldn't keep him out. I had to get the locking hook and eyes (with the hinge) or he'd just take a toy and push the hook out. He was one of those kids that you could never leave alone for more than a few minutes. Heaven help me if I wanted to take a nap or rest. Not unless he was asleep! If I didn't take a shower before dh left for work and Robin was awake, forget it. I didn't get one. Once he started school he couldn't sit still. He'd fidget and bounce on his chair. Or he'd be playing with a pencil or something. I don't know how much of this was the ADHD and how much was the bipolar, or how much is just the fact that he's an extreamly intelligent kid. I hope this helps you a little.
I have seen 2 year olds at ds old school that never ever stop moving. You get tired just looking at them. Get into everything. It is like 5 preschoolers in one child.
Cat, your description of your ds's behavior as a baby/toddler reminds me in many ways of my two year old gs. I take care of him while his parents work, and he is sometimes almost more than I can handle. My ds, the father of this child, was very active as a baby/toddler; but there is a definite difference. I really doubt if we could find a sitter anywhere who would keep this child; and, in fact, I fear that there would be a very good chance that this child could receive serious injuries because you cannot afford to take your eyes off him for any length of time at all. I love him with all my heart, but I find myself becoming so very frustrated at times that afterwards I am ashamed of the way I respond to him. I feel that I am constantly removing him from some dangerous situation, forcing timeout on him, or yelling at him. Like your ds, he seems to have reached most of the developmental stages very early. He walked before ten months and was climbing everywhere and getting into everything before then. We put locks on practically everything and had to change them a time or two before we found any that he couldn't manipulate. We fenced in the yard so that he could play outside without us having to be right beside him, but he started climbing the chain link fence right before he turned two and in a couple of months could already climb over it. You absolutely cannot take your hand off him when you have him out anywhere or he will suddenly bolt away. I am very afraid that he is going to get hurt. Inside the house he is either running back and forth, opening or closing drawers, or climbing up to get something. He can climb up into the window sills or on top of the kitchen stove. If it were not for the fact that he takes a three hour nap every afternoon, I have no idea what I would do. His nap allows me time to rest and rejuvenate myself.
Joan, it sounds like you're living through what I did with my ds! I swore he'd have me gray by the time I hit 30 (didn't happen, I have very healthy hair! lol). I remember when he was 3 calling the public health nurse on base and crying on the phone with her because I wanted to hurt my son. I couldn't take it! I put him in preschool at 4 because I needed the break, then he'd cry 1/2 the time he was there because he wanted me. Why??? So he could tourtue me some more? I know it sounds awful, but that was my life. I wish I had more advise for you, but I don't.
Cat, you don't know how much I appreciate your being so forthright concerning your feelings. It helps to know that these feelings of mine are normal. By the way, I failed to mention earlier that this child's maternal grandfather suffers from Bipolar Disorder. So then I wonder if there is a genetic component going on here too. My gs's five year old brother has been diagnosed with Sensory Integrative Disorder with the possibility also existing for something along the autism spectrum. He seems to have some hyperactivity too, but it is nothing like the two year old's. We were already dealing with the older gs's behavior when the baby came along, and we just couldn't believe that there was also something going on with the younger one. By the way, the five year old's IQ is 145.
bipolar
Thanks for the information, Cat. I'm sure that I will want to talk with you more later.
Honestly, the ADHD thing took me by surprise. My ds was the opposite of what I would expect of an ADHD kid- more of a couch potato. Once he was diagnosed with Tourette's, that's when the ADHD suspicion arose- since there is a high incidence of co-morbidity. Looking back, I can see signs though. He watched (and still watches) TONS of TV. The visual stimulation is almost theraputic for him. If I threaten to throw it out the window (that's happened!
Oh- This book was just recommended to me "Learning outside the lines" (I'm not sure if I have that preposition right). It's awesome. Here's the link!
Laura, Robin will "hyperp-focus" on things also. His therapist thinks he's a bit OCD. He spent about 6 months last year learning as much as he could about the Titanic--he wanted books, models, stories, the movie, you name it. While it was a bit obsessive, he learned a LOT. You can ask this kid anything about the Titanic and he'll still be able to tell you. I'll have to check out that book.
OCD is something we are concerned and watching for with my son as well. His therapist did tell me that ADHD kids can hyper-focus on things of interest as well.
Laura, I was once told that ADHD wasn't a short attention span problem, it was an abnormal attention span problem. That would cover hyper-focusing, I would think. Now how much that is true, I don't know. All I know is it's not a lot of fun at times. Sometimes it is rather funny, though! Robin comes up with the most interesting things...
I thought my dd had some problem at 18 months old when she just wouldnt sit still. She wouldnt even lie down for a nap and if she did, she tore up her room FIRST. This meant tipping dressers over, pulling clothes out of drawers and closet, and pulling her bed apart and moving the mattress and boxsprings across the room. I could not take her anywhere as she would not stay with me. I finally took her to Children's Hospital and had a workup done and they concluded that she had ODD and the beginning stages of ADHD.
Thanks to all of you for your comments. Renee, my dil will speak to the pediatrician about this, but this is the same pediatrician who downplayed the five-year old's problems until my dil went another route to get him evaluated.
Sounds like she needs a new dr. Mine did this too. But once I got involved with wraparound and other agencies, I got the help I needed for dd. I wish you and your dil success in getting the answers you need.
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The only thing I can offer is really try to ignore the little stuff. Take care of what you have to (safety issues and such) and ignore the rest (annoying things that won't hurt anything). It's so hard. Here's a link for a book that might be helpful. {{{{{Joan}}}}}